Top Ten Al Gore Pickup Lines

Now there are rumors that Al Gore was having an affair. If so, maybe he’s better with the ladies than you’d except. In fact, here are some of his well known pickup lines:

TOP TEN AL GORE PICKUP LINES

10. “I created the internet, and now I’m going to create making love to you.”

9. “We’ll make sweet love until the compact fluorescent light bulb burns out… which is a long long time because they’re very efficient.”

8. “The science is settled: I’m dead sexy.”

7. “It would reduce your carbon footprint if you shared a room with me tonight.”

6. “If you just watch this slideshow presentation, I think it makes it pretty clear and indisputable that we should totally do it.”

5. “Lucky for you my lovemaking is a renewable resource.”

4. “It’s not only my personality and mannerisms that are stiff.”

3. “Carefully study your love making option, because I don’t want you to accidentally have sex with Pat Buchanan.”

2. “The rumors are true: I am a robot — The Sex Machine.”

And the number one Al Gore pickup line…

“Here’s an inconvenient truth: There’s only one of me to go around.”

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45 Comments

  1. Whoa! Mister Gore doesn’t pull any punches, does he?

    9. “We’ll make sweet love until the compact fluorescent light bulb burns out… which is a long long time because they’re very efficient.”

    Around two years ago, my Dad replaced his real lights with cheap fluorescent crap. I tried to talk him out of it, but he said he would save a lot of money. Recently, he’s been cursing every fluorescent light bulb in the house for their lack of advertised efficiency as he removes them, and cursing Wal-Mart for not having enough incandescents. It’s almost funny.

    5. “Lucky for you my lovemaking is a renewable resource.”

    Does that mean?…. EWWWWW!!!

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  2. “I’m going to do the same thing to you I did to climate science, baby. Screw you in the ass and ruin your reputation.”

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  3. When he goes out to look for tail, he changes his ringtone to Nelly’s ‘Hot in Herre’.

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  4. Two things have been stolen from me. Bush stole the election and you stole my heart.

    I actually have a second Nobel Prize. It’s for love-making.

    You know how Edwards had an affair with a transvestite? I need to make sure I don’t make the same mistake before I take you home.

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  5. “Is it getting hot in here, or is it just you?”

    “Have I shown you my Nobel PIECE Prize?”

    “Who’s up for some Coital Warming?”

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  6. “Once you go Hack, you never go back!”

    “They didn’t call me ‘The Vice’ for nuthin’ baby.”

    (WARNING: LATEST EWWWW!)
    “Hey honey, wanna recycle body fluids?”

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  7. I think I have proven my anti-communist cred here right?

    I replaced most of my bulbs with the new energy effecient ones. Saves money if you run them alot and they run alot cooler. I bought the first gen back in like 2003 and was not impressed but the new ones are fine bulbs and I doubt most people could tell the difference without looking. The problem was my TV setup was pouring out heat. (thanks to my Kill-A-Watt I bought after I saw it on Mythbusters.)

    120W TVPC
    40W Receiver
    170W TV
    3x 150W bulbs for light
    —————–
    780W.

    Needless to say this small toaster oven equivalent made watching TV in the summer unpleasant. With EE bulbs 150W=35W savings from the 3 = 345W.

    780W-345=435W

    I almost cut my watt draw in half just from a 4$ pack of light-bulbs. A new LED TV like my monitor will cut that draw even more but at the cost of hundreds of dollars. It is a upsetting that liberals have soured people on them because the light bulbs themselves are a design.

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  8. What say we throw off our clothes like we threw out the NOAA data?

    We could go back to my place and pretend we’re the last two polar bears alive.

    C’mon – I’m not as fat and ugly as Michael Moore!

    You’ll love this trick I can do with my Oscar statue.

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  9. I didn’t just invent the internet, I invented the internet porn.

    Want to see my rising hockey stick?

    Want to make out in-a-convienient booth?

    They don’t call my approach wooden for nothing.

    (now I’ll think i’ll vomit some. Thznk’s for the bad mental images, Frnack)

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  10. BTW the Rifftrax of “Day after Tomorrow” is pretty good.

    [It was hilarious; perfect cheesy, clichéd movie for riffing. -Ed.]

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  11. 14. DamnCat says:

    June 16th, 2010 at 3:52 pm
    “Come here often, handsome?”

    This one cracked me up the most. Thread winner, in my book.

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  12. I normally don’t like to make the atmosphere any hotter, but if you come over to my house tonight I think I’ll make an exception.

    We need to use our energy more efficiently – instead of sitting here making small talk we should be home making love.

    I think you just caused me to experience some man-made thermal expansion.

    Lets cap this conversation and trade phone numbers.

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  13. That was good, DamnCat. Not too gross (I don’t like being reminded of Al Gore doing the deed), not too cheesy, perfect.

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  14. You think “Love Story” was a great movie? Wait’ll you see the one they write about our romance!

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  15. As a busy globetrotter with little time for subtlety or formality he should just stick to tried and true classic pick-up lines that are guaranteed to work. Like…”Hey baby wanna f**k?”

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  16. Gore practices his pick-up lines in the mirror sorta like John Edwards actually uses his pick-up lines in the mirror.

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  17. Sex with you would be so great because your parents wont be there slapping a sticker on my ass when I start talking dirty.

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  18. I made a lot of boners while running for President, and you just made another one baby!

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