BTW, plenty is happening at the Alliance Headquarters, including a way to watch our traffic overtake Instapundit.
It’s time now to retire some of my rotating polls.
It’s official, people hate monkeys.
What is your opinion of monkeys?
I hate monkeys. – 175 votes (82%)
I am a Communist. – 38 votes (18%)
I say the introduction of caseless round firearms could solve this problem… it could solve a number of these problems.
What is the biggest problem facing our nation?
Ninjas – 18 votes (7%)
Ammo is too expensive – 108 votes (40%)
Dearth of sexy dames who want go out with me – 72 votes (27%)
Too many squirrels – 72 votes (27%)
But my neighbor’s dog is just a little chiuaua. I blame Whitey.
Who is to blame?
The Jews – 30 votes (13%)
Minorities – 36 votes (16%)
White people – 38 votes (17%)
My neighbor’s dog – 123 votes (54%)
I thought this one was pretty obvious if Ironman had to wear his helmet.
Who would win in a pie eating contest between the Green Lantern and Ironman?
The Green Lantern – 86 votes (52%)
Ironman – 61 votes (37%)
It’s a tie – 19 votes (11%)
I don’t know how people were voting on this. I would have said Mothra, because what the hell could it do?
If you had to choose which monster would attack your city, which one would it be?
Godzilla – 55 votes (28%)
King Kong – 29 votes (15%)
Mothra – 33 votes (17%)
Michael Moore – 81 votes (41%)
Okay; I’m so f–king sorry for asking.
What is your opinion on swearing?
I don’t give a f–k. – 85 votes (37%)
Only dumb f–ks swear. – 54 votes (23%)
Who the f–k are you to be asking this? – 92 votes (40%)
Wow, almost completely even split between all the answers, which adds up to 3 to 1 that the Dell interns should die.
What should be done to the Dell interns from the Dell commercials?
They should be executed by firing squad. – 58 votes (25%)
They should be thrown into a vat of boiling oil. – 55 votes (24%)
They should be drawn and quartered. – 58 votes (25%)
I like the amusing antics of the Dell interns. – 58 votes (25%)
Fine. Jesus kicks my ass.
What is your opinion of IMAO?
It’s better than Jesus. – 30 votes (16%)
It’s on par with Jesus. – 25 votes (13%)
I bet Jesus could write better satire. – 135 votes (71%)
Good. I’d rather be ruled by robots.
What do you think is the more likely future scenario?
Civilization is overthrown by robots (ala Terminator) – 105 votes (61%)
Civilization is overthrown by monkeys (ala Planet of the Apes) – 66 votes (39%)
Godbless the 28 people who said I’m the sexiest man alive… and you better have been women. I’m not a metrosexual.
What best describes Frank J.?
The sexiest man alive – 28 votes (13%)
The smartest man alive – 58 votes (28%)
Dumb as a mule and twice as ugly – 122 votes (59%)
How ironic.
How often do you vote in internet polls?
All the time. I love internet polls! – 52 votes (26%)
Occasionally, and only when the subject interests me. – 55 votes (28%)
I never vote in internet polls. – 93 votes (47%)
And here is the last poll I’m retiring today:
What do you have to say about Glenn Reynolds of Instapundit.com?
Damnable puppy blender! – 62 votes (25%)
He should link to IMAO more. – 32 votes (13%)
I stopped reading him after he got all “political”. – 17 votes (7%)
Indeed. – 135 votes (55%)
Indeed.
I’ll think up some more polls because I care about your opinions.
Yay! We want more polls!
Because we care about your questions as much as you care about our opinions.
IMAO is the funniest humor site on the Internet:
I agree somewhat with that statement.
I have been informed by my beautiful wife that I agree strongly with that statement (because she wants Frank J. to link to her more frequently).
I voted for Michael Moore attacking my city because it would give me a chance to get medieval on his big, fat, lying, hypocritical, money-grubbing, waste of O2, greasy, pimple-covered ASS.
And I think those who voted for the Moore-on voted for the exact same reason.
Yeah, Victor, I voted for the Moore-on for almost the same reason. I’m not sure if I could fit Godzilla’s body in the bed of the truck, but I ‘spect I might be able to cram ol’ Moore-on’s bleeding carcass in there for the ride to the taxidermist.
Well I figured Moore would get tired after walking halfway down a street in my city at which point he would collapse and be eaten by the various critters that roam these parts.
Indeed. So where do we go to vote in these poll things?
I think about half of the votes for you as the sexiest man alive were from me…the others were from Evil Glenn…
Hey, FrankJ, you’ve shot up to a Higher Being in the ecosystem in the past few days! #7 as I write! Wussup wit dat?
Wow, I’m a higher being! Watch out, Insta-evil!
The world being overthrown by apes is more of a time macine scenario… Oh! what the heck!
A burning desire for holy peace®
As the Blog War rapidly degenerates into stultifying trench warfare, the mediator in me wants to give the peace® process a little nudge. Considering that neither side has expressed the slightest interest in peace®, this means that I must take…
these polls are always one sided and have a perfect agenda, however eliminate the polls and eliminate politics-except bi-partisan and we (u.s.) would be so productive the whole world would be so envious of us they would buckle under and do the right thing–we could all live in euphoria before it’s too late//on a wing and a prayer to whom it may concern………
these polls are always one sided and have a perfect agenda, however eliminate the polls and eliminate politics-except bi-partisan and we (u.s.) would be so productive the whole world would be so envious of us they would buckle under and do the right thing–we could all live in euphoria before it’s too late//on a wing and a prayer to whom it may concern………
didn’t know i was in on a humorous site, ao my comment is wasted — right. of course it failed–nothing was wrong with the e-mail add//just youe faulty computer showing a hyphen that didn’t belong/////////