I don’t know if I mentioned it, but I have a new t-shirt out that’s informative about terrorism. If you’re still on the fence about getting one, I’ll not only give you ten reasons to buy one, I’ll give you the top ten reasons to buy one.
TOP TEN REASONS TO BUY THE “KNOW THY ENEMY: TERRORISTS” T-SHIRT
10. If terrorists see you wear one, they’ll know you’re wise to them so they’ll instead terrorize the people next to you.
9. Buying my t-shirt helps the American economy… especially for me.
8. You can enjoy the confused stares from people wondering, “What in God’s name is ‘IMAO’?”
7. You help inform your citizens about terrorism by wearing one, thus performing a public service and making the t-shirt tax-deductible (I haven’t actually verified that with a lawyer; someone try deducting it and tell me if you get audited).
6. Dark color allows you to hide in the shadows in case of ninja attack.
5. Now when people point and laugh at you, you can convince yourself its just because they’re enjoying the humor on your t-shirt thus saving money on expensive therapy.
4. You can never have too many t-shirts… NEVER!
3. Quality cotton construction protects you from monkey bites.
2. Betting money says you don’t already have a t-shirt with the phrase “carpet bombing” on it.
And the number one reason to buy the “Know Thy Enemy: Terrorists” IMAO t-shirt…
I told you to.
There’s a problem with reason number 8, Frank. Isn’t the whole point of this shirt to help make you rich and famous? Doesn’t that mean instead of merely enjoying people’s confused stares, we should inform them of your wonderfulness instead?
“carpet bombing” — I still haven’t figured out why we’re so hot to bomb carpets. Do we think the terrorists are hiding all rolled up in the rugs or something?
What?
Geeze, I thought we were dropping all our old shag rugs out of airplanes onto terrorists because we didn’t want ’em any more.
What?
I would buy a T-Shirt, but I’m a broke College student 🙂
P.S. How often, or do you, update your Alliance links?
If you are paying $5,000 – $10,000 to attend college, you can afford an imao t-shirt.
Hey… I should get paid for saying that…
Whattya say frank? I’ll take my cheque in canadian funds too
Gee Frank, you hit number four on the nose.
My reason for not buying one yet is, nay, was that I had too many T-shirts. I mean, they’re bursting out of my drawers and closet, but you’ve got a point.
Damn you Frank J.! Now I need to spend my hard earned money on one of those shirts.
Andrew: The joys of living at home and attending the local community college to take General Ed classes :), less then $1k a semester 😀
Re: URLs on t-shirts: In 1999 I was working for a company called Fusion, a semiconductor equipment supplier. We had t-shirts with our nifty logo on the front and “fusn.com” on the back in large black letters. Travelling thru the airport in Korea, a bored security guard watched me and my coworker, both in our nifty t-shirts, for a moment then sidled up next to us and said in his wonderfully accurate but accented English, “So you work for F****d-Up, Situation Normal, eh?” then broke up laughing, along with us. We agreed, and had no trouble at customs.
Just a thought, maybe these FrnakJ t-shirts will help with airport security (although I would rather obsere than be the first test subject to try it on a busy day at O’Hare).
obsere: v., (not Latin, maybe Magyar?), to observe, but warily, as in, All readers of IMAO comments obsered his comment’s typo.
Reason #137: It’s a one-piece ensemble. That is, if Bill Whittle is correct…
Bill Whittle – “Of course, Frank J. wore his goddam NUKE THE MOON t-shirt — and nothing else.”
Reason #137: It’s a one-piece ensemble. That is, if Bill Whittle is correct…
Bill Whittle – “Of course, Frank J. wore his goddam NUKE THE MOON t-shirt — and nothing else.”
And just to be sure you got that here it is again!
Reason #137: It’s a one-piece ensemble. That is, if Bill Whittle is correct…
Bill Whittle – “Of course, Frank J. wore his goddam NUKE THE MOON t-shirt — and nothing else.”
You’re not the boss of me.
Buy buy buy, can I get a ripesuck government subsidy to buy one?
I’d buy one but I am too lazy to give you any money, maybe a little linkage on the Alliance would persuade me…