Elephant to bartender: Please hire me, I will work for peanuts. Forget those Emu’s they want too much and can’t even pour a drink. I can.
Also, my trunk is like a fire hose.
The elephant left after a pint, seeking another bar where perhaps he can get some conversation…no matter what room he entered..no one would address him…
“Yeah, I work at the zoo. Six figures. Steady job, retirement, room for advancement. And this is what I’ll look like in fifty years. You? But, sure, you go home alone, or with the busboy.”
What ever happened to this mascot of the Grand Old Partiers?
Male witnesses: “What elephant?”
Nobody seemed to want to talk about Jumbo.
“Howdah you do, ladies?”
“Someone said there was a bull session at the bar, so here I am!”
“What I’ll be doing in your pajamas you’ll never know!”
Wildlife gathering at the watering hole…
Elephant to bartender: Please hire me, I will work for peanuts. Forget those Emu’s they want too much and can’t even pour a drink. I can.
Also, my trunk is like a fire hose.
Want to look skinny? Drink next to an elephant.
At closing time they’re all 10s.
The chic next to the elephant is totally hot….for a VULCAN! (left eyebrow)
An elephant walks into a bar…and all the girls made fun of him for his little tusks.
They just don’t realize what his trunk is capable of…
“Oh, man, I just bought a gross of flower pots. Who’s in?”
“Fat, trunked, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.”
“Who’re you calling stupid?”
Elephant: “Let’s see if I can approximate the grin Oppo would have if he were here.”
No need to crowd, there’s enough of me for everyone.
“I’m just here for a couple of nips.”
Horton Hears a Ho
The two closest to us would make the best interns. Very refined; ladylike. Sip their drinks delicately. Inexpensive to maintain.
The one in the hat rocks the hat very well. Shows a good spirit. Slurps. Hire her, too.
“How would you like to be by a secret elephant burying ground?”
“And who said an elephant never four gets?!”
The elephant left after a pint, seeking another bar where perhaps he can get some conversation…no matter what room he entered..no one would address him…
Hey, baby, want some of deez nutz?
“Yeah, I work at the zoo. Six figures. Steady job, retirement, room for advancement. And this is what I’ll look like in fifty years. You? But, sure, you go home alone, or with the busboy.”