Be a Damn Leader

Posted on May 26, 2010 11:02 am

“Plug the damn hole!” That’s what Obama told people the other day. Because that’s what a leader does. He yells stuff, and then stuff gets done. He’s seen it on TV.


STEP 1: Yell what you want done.
STEP 2: ???
STEP 3: Things get done.

I’m not sure step 2 is actually important.

I wonder why Obama hasn’t used this power before. Like everyone wants the economy to produce more jobs, so I don’t know why Obama hasn’t stared the economy in the eye and said, “Create some damn jobs!” I guess he was too busy working on his damn health care.

Anyway, a lot of people thought Obama should be doing something about the oil leak, so this is him doing something. I don’t really get that though; I thought by now we learned that if we have something really important going on, we should keep him away from it.

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26 Responses to “Be a Damn Leader”

  1. hachie1 says:

    Why can’t he just ‘redistribute’ the oil?

  2. Rubeus says:

    Nah, just redistribute the hole, so that it’s fair to all the bottom of the ocean.

  3. MarkoMancuso says:

    I think he just likes to say “damn”.

    “Welcome to the Hoover Dam. This is your dam tour. Any questions about the dam tour?”

    “Where can I get my damn bait?”

  4. Burmashave says:

    We underestimate his mastery of the situation, foresight and clarity of thought in the face of panic. When he told the officials to plug the d*mn hole, the officials were like, “D*mn, he’s right! All this time we’ve been trying to widen the d*mn hole. Let’s plug it. Yay!!!”

  5. shiggz says:

    I think BP should walk off and say go ahead plug it yourself you F@#$n expert genius light-worker. Maybe he can fill that hole with his experience with hope and change after all those were the most important experience requirements the left insisted their leader needed to have. Hillary did not have enough hope and change so they picked Obama instead. I dont know about you guys but a see a whole bunch of disorderly oil that needs to be organized into communities. I am certain Obama is the right man for the job.

    Who in the hell gave the car keys to this bunch of psychopath overgrown children? When yelling does not get him what he wants is wetting his pants next?

  6. DamnCat says:

    I strongly object to being associated in any way with Obama, dammit!

  7. shiggz says:

    But have they tried yelling at the workers or the hole itself?

    Once again Einstein super man hybrid Obama must do it himself. You would think being related to Dick Cheney would have gotten at least a few how to do @#$# genes.

  8. shiggz says:

    I would love to see a test of conservatives versus liberals of how many of each can change the cars oil, flush the radiator or install a ceiling fan.

    I would bet a million dollars that conservative women would beat liberal men across the board. While there is plenty of moral equivalence and both sides this and that in the end we focus on reality while they focus on feelings. A giant @#$3n hole in the ocean is not about feelings. Like most women and men raised by women he has a giant mental toolbox filled with thousands of specific tools that work for adjusting emotions. However, they don’t have an actual toolbox nor the knowledge how to use actual tools. Galt these D-bags now! Let them be like the b@#tchy women who drives her husband out then has stuff around the house break and care repairs that needed done and suddenly realize they don’t know a dang that matters.

  9. BornLib says:

    Is it not wonderful to have such a brilliant intellectual as our President? This is the kind of subtle insight that we were deprived of during the last administration.

  10. Son of Bob says:

    Poor Obama. Things that are actually part of the job of being president are such distractions from his agenda of destroying the country.

  11. Rockhead says:

    You’d think that someone with all that high-dollar education would have used the grammatically correct “damned” hole instead of “damn” hole. But maybe he was simply parroting someone else’s outburst. Whitehouse insiders report that Michelle frequently is heard yelling the same thing.

  12. storm1911 says:

    Good to know Obama got his management skills watching bad TV. The reality disconnect is amazing. He’s bought his own hype and thinks if he says it, it happens. How about “North Korea, begone !!”, “Dick Cheney, leave me alone!”, or “Bucket, off my head!!”.

    “Plug the damn hole” sounds like a line used by the last democrat president.

  13. Proud Infidel says:

    I hate to tell you shiggz, but even though I’m a conservative, I’ve never changed a car’s oil, flush it’s radiator or installed a ceiling fan. I have flushed a toilet, but that’s about as close as I get.

    I’ve watched other people do it, does that count? I’m big into paying people to do jobs I won’t do.

  14. MartyK says:

    They should plug the damn thing with Michelle’s too-big-to-fail booty.

    BTW, even James Carville is criticizing President 0. I had no idea that Carville was such a racist!

  15. Cilla Mitchell, Galveston Texas says:

    Shiggz: I agree with you on all points. You are right. More than you will know.

  16. hachie1 says:

    Y’know, If y’all keep funnin’ them libbies about their manliness, yer gonna be in for some serious slappy-fightin’, an’ their wimmin folk may be too busy down at the welfare office to hold ’em back.

  17. EnemyoftheState says:

    The enlightened one should assemble a team of his best intellectuals and scientists to sit down with BP and calmly explain to them the importance, nay, the moral imperative of plugging the hole forthwith. Then when BP has shared his true enlightenment, it will be but a matter of hours until they cease their disorganized activities and recognize the one true solution which will make the world safe again for unicorns and butterflies. – If that doesn’t work, nuke the sumbitch.

  18. Thor says:

    Plug the damn hole.

    Insightful, Mr. POTUS. Did you read that off the teleprompter, or was that a rational thought that surfaced? Because I’m sure that never occurred to the BOD or engineers at BP. Did VPOTUS explain what a big effing deal this was? That must’ve been the catalyst for the outburst.

  19. Proud Infidel says:


    It was definitely on the teleprompter. Without it, all Obama can do is mumble something about the 57 states of the Union.

  20. Burmashave says:

    Obama has what I’ve always called the “Pointy Haired Manager Syndrome” (from the Dilbert strip). The Pointy Haired Manager Syndrome goes like this, “Even though I don’t know how to do it, it must be easy.” So, just go do it.

    I’m sure that those of you who are developers and engineers are initimately familiar with the Pointy Haired Manager Syndrome, although it definitely exists in other professions.

  21. Son of Bob says:

    Only a democrat, like Obama, could actually get away with stating that “We will not rest” until this problem is fixed, as he’s heading out the door on vacation…and the press applauds.

  22. Nephew Sam says:

    When the going gets tough, the tough get cussin’… Oh, wait, that’s not right…

  23. seanmahair says:

    Obama is not a leader he’s a megalomanic. He wants people to fawn and idolize him. Not only doesn’t he want to work for their regard he doesn’t want to make decisions or take responsibility for anything. After his reign he will become the “saint” of the Democratic party, setting aside Jimma’ Carter yet again.

    He is the largest waste of carbon on the planet. He’s make the US a joke and he’s the punch line.

  24. Terry_Jim says:

    The “GETTING STUFF DONE PLAN” is part of the overall master plan:
    1. Get elected POTUS without a record of accomplishment.
    2. ?????????
    3.Get RE -elected POTUS without a record of accomplishment.

  25. says:


    STEP 1: Yell what you want done.
    STEP 2: Build a Stage with Pillars
    STEP 3: Things get done.

  26. BobSmarts says:

    Its like the Underpants Gnomes from South Park.

    Step 1: Steal underpants.
    Step 2: ????
    Step 3: Profit

    Except in Obama’s case its

    Step 3: Destroy Private Enterprise.

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