Chill’n Out Max and Relax’n All Cool…

Know what’s a fun things to do? Just before the plane touches ground while landing, stand up and shout at the top of your lungs, “We’re coming in too fast!!!” What are they going to do? Eject you from the plane? You’re already there.
Of course, I’m running out of airlines that will let me fly them.
It so cool to finally see mountains after being in flat, flat Florida all the time. Also, my dad got two .45’s – a Colt Mark IV Series 80 and a Springfield Stainless Steel Mil-Spec. I’m taking the Colt home with me, and, if my mom asks, my dad has had the Springfield since he was a baby. Anyway, everything was closed on the Fourth, so we went out into the desert for plinking. Nothing is cooler than firing dual .45’s while smoking a stogie. Can’t hit s**t firing like that, yet, but it’s still fun.
Well, spent the night drinking beer with my brother and friends and setting off those crappy legal fireworks. Ooh! They shoot sparks and whistle. Need more beer to make those entertaining.
Well, hope everyone is having or had a great Independence Day weekend. I’m putting up a new old post tomorrow. See you then.

July 4th, 1776

Since today is the observed holiday for Independence Day (i.e., the one lots of get off from work), I have a special post today. Ends up, I just got my hands on a tape recorder of when the Declaration of Independence was signed, and I’ve transcribed what was said so we can hear the founding fathers in their own words:

JEFFERSON: So we have like a declaration of independence now.
WASHINGTON: Yeppers. It’s pretty declatory alright.
MADISON: With this we will formally commit treason against England and stuff… you know… once we sign it.
WASHINGTON: Yeah… once we sign it. Well… go ahead and sign, Jeffy.
JEFFERSON: No way, dude. I wrote it… someone else sign first.
WASHINGTON: Uh… I got wig powder on my hands. You sign it, Maddy.
MADISON: No… uh… my arthritis is acting up.
JEFFERSON: I know! Let’s get Hancock! He’ll sign anything!
WASHINGTON: Dude! Good idea!
HANCOCK: You guys wanted me to sign something?
JEFFERSON: Yeah, sign this document here.
HANCOCK: What is it?
WASHINGTON: It’s a petition for… uh… Just sign it!
HANCOCK: Okey-dokey. Heh heh. I signed it big!
MADISON: You sure did. Now run along.
JEFFERSON: There, now if this new nation thing doesn’t work out, we can all blame Hancock.
WASHINGTON: Is that Ben Franklin running over here?
FRANKLIN: Dude! I like totally electrocuted myself! It was awesome! I almost died! Want to try?
JEFFERSON: We’re there, dude!

Thanks to all those who fought and still fight for our liberty, and especially to those who took the risk in starting this country in the first place. It’s from their courage and conviction that I’m able to say with certainty that no one kicks ass like America.
No one.