Our Military XXII: Greetings from Iraq on the 4th

My brother’s best friend from college and the Marines and – as I can say from my own experience – just a plain ‘ole great guy is currently serving in Iraq. He wrote this e-mail on the 4th July and I think it’s really worth reading to put things into perspective:

To All My Family and Friends,
Hello everyone. I am writing you today from a free Iraq. I want you all to know that I am doing well and are in good spirits as I fight for freedom and democracy half way around the world. For those of you who have not gotten a chance to see the other e-mails that I send or read the letters of my Commanding Officer, let me bring you up to speed on what I have been doing over here for the past four months.
My battery operates and controls the ground of an area larger than the state of Rhode Island. Within this area, we work hand-in-hand with the local community to repair and rebuild the infrastructure that has been neglected for the last 14 years. In the four months we have been here we have been able to stabilize and repair the power grid for the main town and its two suburbs. We have improved water production and created a sanitation department to start picking up all of the trash in town. We started a farming CO-OP to help local farms get the equipment and advice they need to plant crops in this region. We have delivered school supplies to the local schools and helped to start and adult literacy program. While this may not sound like much, this is more than what Saddam provided for his own people.
We have helped to stabilize the area by working with the Iraqi Police Service and the Iraqi National Guard. We conduct joint patrolling and training to create a secure and safe environment in this area. We have worked very hard to screen and evaluate Iraqi’s to serve in the Iraqi Security Forces. We will soon see the products of our efforts, as the first group will head to Baghdad to begin training in the coming weeks. We have also been working with the Iraqi Border Guards and Customs Police. Our efforts with them helped in the opening of the Iraq-Saudi Arabia border. This is allowing millions of gallons of fuel, heath care, and food to begin flowing into the country. This will provide much needed relief to the country of Iraq.
But the most important part of this whole process is that not one single shot has been fired at Coalition Forces in anger since October of last year. This is completely related to the aggressive and professional attitude of the Iraqi Security Forces in the area. We have become a team working for the improvement of a free Iraq.
This has been a very rewarding experience for me. I have taken some time to reflect on what we are trying to accomplish here. Especially on the Fourth of July and the 228th year of our independence. Just 6 days ago Iraq took its next step to becoming a democracy or at least not a dictatorship. Despite what you might see on the news, hear on the radio, or read in the newspapers, good things are happening in this country. The majority of Iraqis want to live a normal peaceful life with all the normal things that we have in America. There are only a couple of thousand people in a country of 24 million that are trying to stop the good things that are happening in this country. Just a few thousand have taken the attention of all the major news networks in the country and put an evil face on what is being accomplished over here. The terrorists never had better allies than the American News Networks!! It is because of the media that the terrorists continue to fight.
Please take everything you see on the news or read in the paper with a grain of salt. There are Marines, Soldiers, and Sailors in parts of Iraq that are having great successes in the communities that they are living around. Our story is not being told and it is the story that should be told the most. Please help the Americans around you to realize that we are struggling to create a free and democratic country over here and it takes time. It took 14 years for the United States to have a constitution that worked after we declared our independence. It then took another 150 years before everyone in this country could vote. After World War II we had troops on the ground for years helping to rebuild Europe and Japan. This is not an easy process. It takes time and a lot of hard work. Remind other Americans to be patient. You cannot buy freedom on the shelf in a store. It is paid for with blood and hard work.
I wish you all the best on this Fourth of July. I love you all very much. I will be coming home soon. My count down has me here for just less than 3 more months. Remember, Freedom is not Free!
Semper Fi
God Bless
Lt. Adam – From a distant outpost in Western Iraq

Late Night Shows Can’t Stop Stealing From IMAO

From a reader Lou I heard that Jimmy Kimmel LIVE made a reference to how Jackass: The Move beat out Fahrenheit 9/11 but didn’t credit me! I guess lowly Frank J. must sit here unnoticed while everyone else profits off his humor.
I’ll get them all one day…

Frank on Kerry’s VP Pick

Boooring!
Man, I was hoping he would have shaken things up and picked Hillary or Satan himself. Instead, Kerry just picked one of his servants – a trial lawyer. I can see all the other trial lawyers flicking their forked tongues in glee at the thought of having one of their own in high office.
There is good news though: I got a Ruger Vaquero. Bang! Bang!
UPDATE: Wait! Where was Edwards during Vietnam?
UPDATE 2: If he’s such a rich trial lawyer, why does he dress his wife in a blanket?

IMAO Flashbacks: Enter the Chomps

“In My World: Black Project Insano” was the first multipart In My World™, three parts posted in 2003 on May 28th, June 2nd, and June 4th (my birthday!). Multi-part posts happen when I get lazy and don’t feel like finishing the whole damn things in one sitting (orignally it was going to be one post, then I was going to finish it up in two, and then it became the final three). The name Black Project Insano, comes from a friend of mine who writes wacky internet comics.
This series is also notable for the introduction of Chomps, the world’s angriest dog. He was made for a throwaway gag in the second part, but, he was so much fun writing for, I brought him back in the very end and teamed him with Rumsfeld. The Chomps t-shirt is still in the designing phase, for those curious.
Chomps was based on an actual dog who chased me once when I went door to door for Cub Scouts collecting cans for charity. I tried to stop the dog by throwing cans at him, but he caught them in his mouth and ripped them to shreds. Eventually, I sought refuge by climbing up a tree, but the dog then gnawed at the tree trunk, trying to cut the whole tree down. He almost succeeded, but then a hippy walked by and the dog immediately attacked, ripping the man to shreds. I used the distraction to flee, and the incident has scarred my psyche ever since. Actually, everytime I write about Chomps, I feel my sanity slowly slipping…
Anyhoo, here is the special directors cuts of Black Project Insano, all three parts united for the first time. Enjoy!

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