Hello, Aquafans.
Being underwater most of the time (I can breathe underwater), I don’t get the same news coverage. Luckily, I can talk to fish. Thus, through them, I keep informed. To help out, here’s the current news in brief:
* In London, if your skin is dark, they will shoot you multiple times in the head. I recommend vacationing elsewhere if you have a heavy tan.
* President Bush is having his annual vacation with crawfish – I never knew he was a friend of water-breathers! Also, I keep hearing there is some sort of circus near where he is staying. What a fun vacation!
* Israel has turned anti-Semitic and are now evicting Jews! They have they’re work cut out for them, though, because I hear the place is full of them.
* Apparently, before the 9/11 attacks, Mohammed Atta and a supervillian named Abe Danger were identified as terrorists, but lawyers prevented the information from being passed along. Luckily, we don’t have lawyers here in the sea. The closest thing we have are sharks! Ha ha ha!
That’s all the news for now, and I’ve finished drinking my latte at this internet cafe.
Remember, I talk to fish so you don’t have to.
This is Aquaman, signing off.