Best newsish fakery you’ll read that’s not written by me:
“Media Votes to Expel Rod Blagojevich from Democrat Party”
Nice one, Rev. Right.
Best newsish fakery you’ll read that’s not written by me:
“Media Votes to Expel Rod Blagojevich from Democrat Party”
Nice one, Rev. Right.
Hey Harvey!
Here’s an outline for a possible story you could use:
Unnamed Georgia peanut farmer sought as ‘person of interest’ in relation to ongoing investigation of Salmonila poisoning case which has resulted so far in 500 + cases of sickness and 8 deaths. Shipment of peanuts turned back by Canadians described as contaminated with a “filthy, putrid, decomposed substance”. This person has been rumored to have had access to nuclear materials at some time in the past and if he’s gone rogue will be sought by the FBI and NEC as well as health officials.
In a unrelated news item, former president Jimmy Carter announced through a member of his staff that he’s going on an indefinite retreat to an undisclosed location. The prominent Democrat left an enigmatic message, “I have no regrets and I wish I’d done more!”
LOL Journalists Against Conservative Killjoys Allied in Support of Socialism (JACKASS)
NAIROBI, Kenya (Jan. 31) — George Obama, the half brother of U.S. President Barack Obama, has been arrested by Kenyan police on a charge of possession of marijuana, police said Saturday.
George ObamaInspector Augustine Mutembei, the officer in charge, said Obama was arrested on charges of possession of cannabis, known in Kenya as Bhang, and resisting arrest. He is scheduled to appear in court Monday, Mutembei said.
He is being held at Huruma police post in the capital of Nairobi.
Wait!! This one is true!! What they are not reporting is that the dope was inside a care package with a White House seal. There is no word on whether the Kenyan authorities found the crack cocaine also rumored to be in the package, along with a blackmail payment of $17.00 in return for Geroge’s promise not to ever come to dinner at the Obamas.
Stay tuned. You heard it here first!
Obamatown, Wisconsin (AP) – A man going by the name of Harvey Olson was arrested in Obamatown’s post office today for possession of teabags which police think contained a questionable substance. “They were definitely meant for Congress,” said Dick Buster, Obamatown’s police chief. “They were in a package addressed to a local Congressman and labeled ‘Up Yours + Dump In The Potomac.’ And it smelled funny – which tipped us off.”
Apparently, Mr. Olson refused to open the package for inspection saying he objected to a life size picture of President Obama, Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid staring at him from across the counter. “I can’t open this with them looking at me!” yelled Olson, waving his box around violently. Dick Buster, already in the post office, witnessed the fracas and intervened. “This guy really hates those Congressmen,” said Buster. “I don’t know why. They’re sending money to Wisconsin soon to bail us out. Why would anyone think of sending TEABAGS to Congress?”
The teabags are being sent to a laboratory in California for analysis along with advance payment due to California’s financial crisis. Meanwhile, Mr. Olson is in the city jail but Buster declined to say what Olson is being charged with. “We’re gonna let him cool off,” said Buster, “Then we’ll bust him – maybe on malicious mischief, or harassing a Congressman with tea, I don’t know.”
It’s not known yet if this is the same Harvey Olsen as the world-famous, mild-mannered newsish fakery reporter for a great metropolitan website, IMAO, fighting the never ending battle for truth, justice and the American way.
Mr. Olsen has accomplished something this administration has failed to do: he created jobs!