WASHINGTON (AP) – In a bizarre, rambling internet video, former Cuban President Fidel Castro implored the “extreme right” to stop their constant attacks on American President Barack Obama.
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“How dare anyone out there make fun of Barack after all he’s been through!” wailed a tearful Castro, filming himself beneath a blanket, “His poll numbers are slipping! Fox News won’t even carry his press conferences. He had two kids and his wife turned out to be a political liability who feeds the homeless while wearing $500 sneakers. All you crazy racist right wingers care about is voters and scoring cheap political points off him! He’s a human! What you don’t realize is that Barack’s making the Democrat party a laughing stock and all you do is make a bunch of Joker Socialism posters about him!”
When asked later about his unhinged rantings, a more sedate Castro sheepishly explained that he’d just gotten carried away.
“Look,” he said, “I only meant to say that the extreme right hates him for being African-American. But then I started thinking about the how the racist right will do everything possible to wear him down, the tears flowed, my mascara dripped… not my most Presidential moment. Still, 26 million views on YouTube – TOTALLY worth it!”
Although some pundits speculate that the whole video was staged & scripted to draw attention to a lonely old dictator/attention-whore, Castro reaffirmed that he was deadly serious about defending the American President.
“Leave Barack Obama alone right NOW! I mean it! Anyone who has a problem with him, you deal with ME! Because he’s not doing well getting that bucket off his head.”
