Good Things Obama Has Done

Obama told a fundraiser that members of the Tea Party should thank him for cutting taxes. I kinda get this idea that if you want to find out what Obama really thinks, you need to go to a fundraiser — not that what he thinks is particularly enlightening. I’m not sure where he thinks he cut taxes, but I know where he’s raised them. If there was anyone who thought there was anything to Obama’s pledge not raise taxes on people who earn under $250,000, he should spend the rest of the Obama administration punching himself in the junk.

Still, looking at the rapidly rising deficits, this year is kinda the calm before the storm in terms of taxes. Maybe we can take some time to point out some good things Obama has done this year and where our fears may have been overblown.

GOOD THINGS OBAMA HAS DONE

* Obama hasn’t literally collapsed the country.

* No one has nuked us yet.

* He may have bowed, but he’s yet to surrender to any dictator.

* Obama hasn’t accidentally burnt down the White House.

* He hasn’t spent half his term with a bucket stuck on his head.

* He hasn’t yet left Iraq in complete chaos.

* He hasn’t revealed himself to be a Muslim sleeper-agent set on destroying the country. (Then again, I guess that would be a more logical explanation for a lot of his actions.)

* He hasn’t traded our sovereignty for magic beans.

This isn’t all to say Obama has done a good job, but it’s just to help us keep perspective and realize he could be a lot worse. So yay for that not happening.

We’ll see how we feel again in a year.

25 Comments

  1. He hasn’t accidently released Godzilla from an iceberg.

    He hasn’t slipped up and altered the course of history by tripping into the Time Tunnel.

    He has yet to throw up on the Japanese Prime Minister.

    He hasn’t been caught booty watching. (Oh wait, never mind.)

    He hasn’t traded NORAD to swap fins for legs. Or anything else.

  2. I can’t wait another year to see how we “feel,” Frank. I’m just overflowing with good will towards him N O W.

    * Hasn’t crashed a Tea Party rally with deadly teleprompters – yet.

    * Has the DOD ready to respond to cyber attacks while Iran builds their bomb! Yay! We R strong. We love being strong.

    * Seems to have convinced his wife to stop wearing breast belts.

    * Keeps getting photographed looking like an evil, smiling clown. Clown colleges just love that.

    * Is keeping Biden on a relatively short leash without revealing his daily “STFU, Biden” admonishments.

  3. * He hasn’t literally mooned the American people.

    * He hasn’t given Michelle a lip-lock on national television like Algore did to Tipper.

    * We all thought that he was going to be a disaster for America…..and he hasn’t disappointed us yet.

  4. Excellent list of O-complishments! Here’s some more:

    * Given more Lenin-like poses than any US President. Come to think of it, he’s the only US President ever to pose like Lenin.

    * Make us look back fondly to the George W Bush administration. AKA “The Good Ol’ Days.”

    * Reminded us that when it comes to flushing the taxpayer’s money down the toilet, the GOP is small potatoes next to the real pros in the Democrat Party.

    * Took Jimmy Carter off the “Worst President Ever” hook.

    * So that’s why Joe McCarthy went after those @#$%&*! Commies like he did!

    * Make a legitimate case as to why teleprompters are evil and must be eradicated.

  5. But…but he DID cut taxes!!! All those unemployed people got their taxes cut to ZERO!! Now that is hope and change you can believe…in. He never said he’d cut them for people who actually pay them, like those thankless tea bag people, only that racist Bush would do that.

  6. He hasn’t held a gun to his head, and said, “Hold it! Next man that makes a move, the n***er gets it!”
    He has never kept a promise beyond it’s expiration date.
    He makes sparkly vampires seem manly.
    He hasn’t died in office, leaving Joe F***in Biden as President.
    Natural disasters are now blamed on Global Warming, not BOOOSH!

  7. I’m just happy that he’s demonstrated enough incompetence to quell any fears that he might have been the Antichrist.

    He seems to have done a good job shutting up the Clintons.

    Plus, he’s completely rehabilitated Dick Cheney’s image, and George W. Bush’s good name.

  8. We haven’t been nuked yet…you’re missing a (,) And a few other words like “we haven’t been nuked yet, but its only because he realized we won’t all fit in the microwave at the same time. Let’s let Iran handle that one ok?”

    He hasn’t started singing the theme song to Barney & Friends (not Barney Frank I actually mean the purple obamanoxious dinosaur) during Televised speaking engagements.

    If he does that do we have a right to make sure that #12’s 4th statement becomes no longer viable?

  9. He hasn’t bowed to EVERY dictator in the world,
    only the ones he has met.

    While the President threw out the first pitch at a Nationals game,
    he hasn’t nationalized the team
    or baseball.

    He has mocked the Tea parties, but he has thrown some rocking parties at the White House.

    By ending USA manned space travel, Obama has saved American grain from
    being devoured by tribbles.

  10. I agree with Harvey (is that the real Harvey?) that more caveats are needed. “Yet” is a good one but “as far as we know” should also be used. Obama could have surrendered to a dictator when he dodged the press for 2 hours last week and we’d never find out until he announces it shortly after he loses the next election. Just for example, I mean.

  11. Pingback: Obama NASA Speech: No NASA Employees Allowed (Video) » Right Pundits

  12. Ten: President Obama has slowed down the recession. Nobody is talking depression anymore, and some are talking recovery. Trying to catch this economy from crashing was like trying to catch a 100 ton boulder dropped off a 70-story building. The nertia alone is going to push you backwards until you can slow the force. Most wouldn’t even step in front of a boulder coming at them like this. Obama stepped in the gap and stuck to a measured recovery plan of stimulus dollars and labor force transition.
    Nine: President Obama saved Wall Street. And Wall Street tried to punk him by paying itself first. He exposed the absence of regulatory oversight on Wall Street, and economic and financial investment reform is being discussed like never before.
    Eight: President Obama saved the collapse of the American automotive industry. By making GM restructure before bailing them out, and putting incentive money to help the industry, he saved the industry. People want to make jokes about “cash for clunkers” but the automakers aren’t laughing. They’re thanking him.
    Seven: President Obama shifted the focus of the war from Iraq to Aftghanistan, and putting the emphasis on reducing terrorism where it should have been all along-but now they want to say he’s making war, not peace. Well, at least he didn’t destabilize a whole region on a false premise. It’s better than what we had.
    Six: President Obama relaxed Anti-American tensions throughout the world. This was more serious than the previous administration was willing to let on. The President made good on his promise to make a major address on American-Muslim relations and he did it in a Muslim country, showing a good faith that America hadn’t shown in a while.
    Five: President Obama closed the prisoner “torture camp” at Guantanamo Bay. Holding prisoners for eight years without charging them was acceptable under the previous administration. It is not acceptable under this administration. Obama’s next challenge is what to do with the detainees.
    Four: President Obama has made the environment a national priority, and a primary source for job creation. The era of polluting industrialists is over, and with a President that understands the benefits of green conversion, America can become a leader in the industry of the future.
    Three: President Obama has made education a national priority by putting emphasis and money behind new ideas like charter schools, but speaking directly to school children in telling them they have to do their part. It’s what any President should be encouraging but Obama’s so popular, he was accused of trying to “socialize” or “prothelitize” the children. It’s a sad day when the President of the United States can’t speak to school children because their parent’s views conflict.
    Two: President Obama is on the verge of passing universal health care, with a public option, to insure everybody in America has care when they are sick. He’s doing it, despite villification of ideologues and while in the midst of an H1N1 epidemic where millions could get sick this winter. The people feel him on this.
    One: President Obama has restored credibility to the American Presidency where the world is looking to him to lead America out of unilateralism and back into multilateral global cooperation. The Nobel Peace Prize was an acknowledgment that Obama had led and is leading a non-violent cultural revolution in America. Everybody, except for a few in America, can see the change. Still, the world understands what happened one year ago, and they thought they’d never see such a shift occur. The election of Obama helped the world see the light that America wasn’t ready to self-destruct.

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