Obama sure loves his car metaphor. He keeps going on about how Republicans drove the car into the ditch, and now he’s gotten it out (skyrocketing unemployment is somehow “getting it out of the ditch” in this metaphor), and now you have to choose ‘D’ to go forward and don’t want to choose ‘R’ and go backwards… back to a time, you know, when 6% unemployment was high.
It’s pretty idiotic this is the metaphor Obama is clinging to, but maybe Republicans can expand off of it into some car metaphors of their own.
SUGGESTED CAR METAPHORS FOR REPUBLICANS
“Now it’s time to hope it’s a bond car and there is an ejector seat button.”
“We kept telling Obama to pay attention to the road to keep an eye out for jobs, but he was too busy texting about health care.”
“Take the keys away from him! He’s drunk on socialism!”
“So the car is in a ditch and he wants to drive it forward. Do we have any proof this guy even passed the written test before he got behind the wheel? Release his records!”
“The car is stuck in a ditch, and his solution is to give it an oil change.”
“I thought he said he was going to call a tow truck! Why is he at the golf course?
“Wait a second; he’s driving us to Canada! We told him we didn’t want to go there!”
“While that weenie Obama is spinning his wheels in the mud, our plan is to transform the car into an awesome giant robot and have it kill Decepticons.”
-Some states dont even have drivers ed.
-Just so I am clear decepticon is the new code word for closet socialist democrats and big government pro amnesty RINOs right? (Does Bush get a pass?)
-This whole metaphor is silly, like Michelle would let him drive
-Joe Biden left his dirty diaper under the backseat.
-Pelosi left her “my 733 botox playkit” in the trunk.
-Barney Frank censored censored censored censored censored Chris Dodd censored censored and that was just one stop light!
-Harry Reid keeps pulling hitchhikers in off the road through one side of the car and pushing them out through the opposite side door.
-Take Maxine waters with you if you need gas she will play the race card until you get a fill up for free
-Charlie Rangel has not sent an insurance payment in the last 15 years.
-William Jefferson hid the registration money in his “crisper drawer”
-Obama doesn’t care what kind of car it is along as its “fun” and has room for his golf clubs.
-Obama dropped the car off with his friends at BP who promised to give it a tune up but accidentally sliced open the fuel line so it is flammable and spilling everywhere.
“This guy doesn’t read road signs! He’s going the wrong way on the one-way road to prosperity!”
“His block is cracked, he’s thrown a rod, his radiator has boiled over, his battery is dead and the wheels fell off after the axles broke. Otherwise, he’s doing just fine. See, he’s already thumbing a ride.”
And,
“He’s blown a head gasket, his water pump threw an impeller, his injectors are clogged, his spark plugs are burned, and his gas tank is empty.”
“His problem is high methanol gasoline. The stuff sucks.”
“If he doesn’t hand back the keys quick, pretty soon its gonna be a Flintstonemobile.”
“But his tires are properly inflated.”
The American people (Adults) gave him the keys to the car, despite the fact he had little to no experience driving, because he sounded like he somewhat understood how to drive. It was for a short “test run”. He jumped behind the wheel, roared off down the road full throttle, and disappeared over the horizon. Phone calls almost immediately started coming in to the Adults with reports of hit and run accidents, liquor store robberies to buy more gas, pedestrians getting run over, and a massive car chase involving the cops. He calls the Adults on the phone and explains to them that he doesn’t intend on giving the keys back.
A black guy from Chicago? How much you wanna bet Obama doesn’t even have a license? So, why would anyone let him drive?
Obama drives an evil corporate machine that drinks the fruits of Mother Earth and gives back nothing but black polluting smoke in return?
R is for Retard
D is for D!ick Head
S is for Sport Mode which where my Passat remains at all times where I use my paddle shifters built on my steering wheel to burn as much fossil fuel as possible through my 3.6 litre!
“Obama’s car is in the ditch. What’s blocking the road there? TEA??!!!”
He took the keys to the car and he brought it back empty.
If Republicans drove the car into the ditch, it was only after warning those unruly Democrats in the back seat,”If you don’t stop acting like socialists, I going to drive this car into a ditch!”
Thankfully, the car is a Chevy Volt. We wont get much farther down the wrong road, even if Obama’s still driving.
If ‘Drive’ is Democrat and ‘Reverse’ is Republican, we better put it in ‘Low’ Libertarian for a little while, because of the huge mountain of debt infront of us.
So, in Obama’s car, there is only one forward gear, ‘D’ for dumbass!
I’ll keep grinding the gears untill I find ‘Impeach’!
Typical man. He’ll keep driving forward, insisting he’s not lost. Shoulda voted Palin.
He may be heading in the wrong direction, but he’s getting there really FAST.
“Obama’s electric car needs a charge, but we don’t have an extension cord long enough to reach the ditch!”
“We’re Republicans! We can use our F-250 diesel 4X4 to tow Obama out of the ditch!”
“The bad news: Obama’s stuck in the ditch. The good news: Michelle has decided to stop henpecking him and ask someone for directions”
“Obama’s electric car is stuck in a ditch. Let’s build a windmill!!!”
“Obama’s only solution to the car being stuck in the ditch: A prime-time press conference wherein he lectures America on how to prevent future ditch excursions”
Dammit! Biden put the GPS in upside-down! Again!
If ‘R’ is reverse, I can’t wait to hear the ‘beep beep beep’ this November!
Our slogan should be “Back the Truck UP!”
Keeping it in D and looking for a spot for a U-turn will take too long. We need to use the e-brake and slam it in R to do a J-turn.
“Obama, ‘D’ wont work anymore because your policiy to continue driving despite what the fuel guage says has run us out of gas. GET OUT AND PUSH! I’ll take the wheel.”
America: We sat here right in this room and went over this and over this!
Obama: Yeah, but that
TruCoathealth care–America: I sat right here and said I didn’t want no
TruCoathealth care!Obama: Yeah, but I’m sayin’, that
TruCoathealth care, you don’t get it and you getoxidizationdeficit problems. It’ll cost you a heck of lot more’n five hundred–America: You’re sittin’ here, you’re talkin’ in circles! You’re talkin’ like we didn’t go over this already!
Obama: Well, we never done this before. But seeing as it’s special circumstances and all, I can knock a hundred dollars off that
Trucoathealth care.America: One hundred–You lied to me, Mr
LundegaardObama. You’re a bald-faced liar. A f*cking liar.Reference Link
Relax, when the repo man comes for the car, he will get it out of the ditch.
RINOS: “Can we change the radio station so we can listen to some GOOD music!”
RINOS: “Turn up the A/C – I’m hot!!!”
RINOS: “Are we there yet? Can we stop soon – I need to go to the baaathrooooooooom!!!”
Obama: “I am putting diesel fuel in this gasoline engined car because the car, and manufacturer of the car don’t know that it is best for this car and all other cars”
Us: “If you put gasoline in that car it will be ruined for us and anyone else who comes along in the future”
Obama: “You are a racist!!”
I got some stuff about where he can stick his gear shift, but I can’t quit figure out how to say it.
Problem is the left just dug up from some old hippies back yard a hundred year old rusted out broken down socialist engine that has blown up and killed most everyone that has used that series of motor in the past and forced installed it after yanking out and tossing the strongest known engine in all of history the “constitutional republic built on top of free enterprise.”
The free enterprise engine isn’t perfect but compared to the ugly broken mess of the socialist engines track record you’d be forgiven for thinking it might be.
You ALL miss Obama’s point. You assume he’s talking about cars, but he never uses the word.
It’s a BUS.
-For years he and his ilk have been leeching of other people to give them rides. They view it as they have gotten along just fine so far without a car of their own. What they dont grasp is that our car was how we made a living and when we lose our car they run out of people to leech off.
-I think I feel about the Constitution in their hands how my dad must have felt when as a dumb@#$ teenager I was out late on the weekends with his nice car and with little to my name but more b*ners then sense or money combined. Not a good combination.
@Keith oh no a hippie bus? With awful smells, sounds, crabs, and lice? Is that what is happening? If so I would like to be thrown under the bus please. I understand that is the one thing he is good at.
Someone could tell him if you throw enough retards, I mean socialists, I mean democrats, under the wheels the car eventually will gain traction and come out of the ditch if you get out and let an American drive.
The real American engine runs on Tea not on infant blood bought on credit.
“Relax, when the repo man comes for the car, he will get it out of the ditch.”
Is that “Repo” with a capital-R for Republican, spacemonkey?
But what if it’s a Repo woman? Sarah Palin?
When you are on the edge of a cliff and about to drive off, R is what you need, not D!
Chris Christie and Paul Ryan can be the Duke boys. Obama and Biden are Boss Hogg and Cletus. Palin or Bachman as cousin daisy. Thomas Sowell as wise old Uncle Jessie.
Heh! Sarah Palin: Repo Woman.
obama’s driving this country off a cliff at warp speed. He makes Thelma & Louise look like little old ladies out for a Sunday spin.
“While that weenie Obama is spinning his wheels in the mud, our plan is to transform the car into an awesome giant robot and have it kill Decepticons.”
Off topic, they’re filming Transformers 3 right outside my office today. My aunt and 11 yr old cousin were watching it while waiting to meet me for lunch and one of the crew gave my cousin a fake piece of bent up, burned up re-bar from the shoot.
The Republicans should point out that THE PEOPLE gave the keys to the car to Obama, he’s gone for a joy-ride, and now he has the balls to say he is not giving the keys back. THE PEOPLE can just look at the condition of the car and see if they want to go along with it, or forcibly take the keys back.
A somewhat large point of that is the fact that it’s THE PEOPLES CAR.
The Peoples Car was a Volkswagen endorsed by Hitler. Holy Crap! I see the light!
@Cilla – Good point. I didn’t quite mean that, but…
How about idea #2:
It can be argued that George W. Bush drove the car into a ditch. However, it was still driveable at that point and still had some gas in the tank. Now, it’s empty and questionable if it will ever drive again, let alone get all the way back up to speed.
Take my word for it, unless you can swim reaaaal good, you’re better off having your car stuck in the ditch than stuck at the bottom of the bay….The ghost of Ted Kennedy, shoveling, some where down below.
Obama turned a Cadillac into a Yugo.
Things Obama is trying to do to get car out of ditch:
*Pimp his and all his crony’s rides (Stimulus)
*Convert the car to a Canadian Ambulance (ObamaCar?)
*Replace still-working 8-cylinder with puny electric golf cart motor (Cap’n Trade)
The car is still in the ditch, but Obama’s managed to pay for hydraulics, NOZ, a new stereo, new interior, new Rims, a cool bumper sticker, a full tank of gas a steering wheel made of gold, and TV for his buds in the backseat…..Car is still in the ditch, but it looks good.
You can rename that ditch, and call it a highway sponsored by the stimulus, but it’s still a ditch. The passengers aren’t fooled.
While in the ditch, their engine mounts rusted out and the engine fell out of the car. At the same time, they are wandering around the neighborhood conning money out of people.
My comeback to the “D makes you go forward” thing is: Sure, D makes you go forward and R backward. And when you’re headed toward the edge of a cliff, which gear do you think you should be in?
If he were with Thelma and Louise on the brink of the Grand Canyon, he would still say “we must go forward!”
No offense meant to Chevy owners but this administration is just like a Chevy truck and is sinking “Like a Rock”.
The car’s stuck in the ditch up to its doors in mud, the radiator’s boiling over, the car’s black box is on fire (needless to say the “check engine” light is on)… and… a F5 tornado is heading straight for them.
Volkswagen may have been supported and financed by the Nazis, but it was engineered and operated by Dr. Ferdinand Porsche, a non-party member and a devout Catholic who was responsible for saving the lives of thousands of Jews who worked in his factories.
Henry Ford, on the other hand, was a notorious anti-Semite and a personal friend of Hitler.
Obama’s car is just like his opinion of himself: a Pontiac (Poor Old N. Thinks It’s A Cadillac)
The car’s stuck in the ditch, the tires are flat, the kids are throwing-up in the back seat and the wife is yelling at her husband, “You should have asked for directions 100 miles ago.”