[High Praise! to Tongue Tied]

Firefighter fired for putting Obama toilet paper in the stall at work.

Don’t know why. The stuff is pretty mainstream. They even sell it at Amazon.

Meanwhile ObamaToiletPaper.com even has a catchy (if in questionable taste) jingle about the product.

Kristen Stewart and Tobey Maguire should get together and form an expression.

— Ken Plume (@KenPlume) December 12, 2012

if will. i. am’s eventual epitaph isn’t “will. i. was” then we have failed as a society

— Andy Levy (@andylevy) December 12, 2012

What’s the big deal? Pat Moran’s relationship with his girlfriend was “mostly peaceful,” just like union protests and Occupy Wall Street.

— John Hayward (@Doc_0) December 12, 2012

The N-word is used repeatedly in Tarantino’s new movie “Django Unchained”. It’s pretty shocking unless you’re watching at Mel Gibson’s house

— MancowMuller (@MancowMuller) December 13, 2012

In continuing with the theme of blogging about stuff I actually care about, I don’t know why I don’t blog more about TV. I like TV shows, but don’t have as much time for TV these days. In fact, I currently watch no dramas as those are an hour long and I just can’t invest that much time in TV watching at once, so SarahK and I only watch half-hour comedies.

BTW, who made the law that comedies are a half-hour and dramas are an hour? If you see a drama that’s only a half-hour, that’s a good sign you’re in the Twilight Zone.

Anyway, my favorite comedy right now is Parks and Rec, because who doesn’t love Ron Swanson. We need people in government who hate government. Also, Buttercup could be in the middle of crying, but if she hears the Parks and Rec theme, she has to stop what she’s doing and dance. My favorite was Community — one of the most daring shows out there — but it has a new show runner now and doesn’t start again until February, so we’ll see.

For new shows, I’m really liking The Mindy Project. In fact, we’re now recording all 2 hours of comedy on Fox Tuedays — Raising Hope, Ben & Kate, New Girl, and The Mindy Project (I’ve yet to see a whole episode of Ben & Kate, but we always caught pieces on our DVR and ended up liking it enough to finally add it last week) — so good going Fox. You’ve now bested NBC Thursday (which was perfect back when it was The Office, 30 Rock, Community, and Parks and Rec). BTW, I’m almost ashamed to admit how much we like The Office considering how tired it should be by now. It’s definitely good they’re ending 30 Rock, though.

We also watch How I Met Your Mother. During the summer, we watched the first six seasons on Netflix and really liked it so we bought the seventh season on Amazon streaming and our finally watching it live this season (well on DVR). Barney is hilarious, but they definitely should bring the show to a close soon as Ted Mosby just gets more and more pathetic the longer it goes on.

And the only other shows we watch are The Middle and Modern Family. Incidentally, The Middle is the only comedy out of these I would consider a family show (we don’t worry about watching it when Buttercup is in the room). Raising Hope is close to being one.

So that’s all the TV I watch as I’m now admitting to myself I’ve stopped watching The Simpsons. The first ten seasons of The Simpsons are one of the biggest influences on my sense of humor, but just can’t motivate myself to watch them anymore and they’re cluttering the DVR. The Simpsons had a few bad seasons a while back, but I thought they’ve actually been pretty good the past couples seasons I watched (when they finally went to HD), but it’s just like in Poochie episode where at the end Bart and Lisa are watching an episode of Itchy and Scratchy and saying how it’s still classic and then turn it off because they’re bored of it. So maybe the upper limit of how long a show can hold your attention is like fifteen seasons.

Anyway, that’s the TV I watch. Oh, and Big Bang Theory. Absolutely everyone loves Big Bang Theory. Wow, it does seem like a lot of TV when I write it all out like that, but we usually just watch two shows a day — one at lunch and one at dinner. So an hour of TV a day which has to be well below average.

And one last thing: I can’t wait for the new Arrested Development episodes on Netflix and will probably rewatch that series for the millionth time before they come out and enjoy that more than any new TV series because it is the greatest comedy ever.

Oh great. Now the Mexicans have stolen my Mexi-Cannon™ and are using it for evil.

So Democrat Rep. Jim Moran’s son — same one James O’Keefe caught on camera strategizing about voter fraud — plead guilty to assault against his girlfriend and only got probation for fracturing her skull. And Jim Moran’s statement on the matter: “They look forward to putting this embarrassing situation behind them.” Because when you smash a woman’s head into a trashcan, it sure is embarrassing for both of you. We’re not talking Ted Kennedy level embarrassing hijinks, but at least one of them definitely had a red face after that.

And of course the left, so concerned about women are… completely avoiding talking about this whatsoever. Because they don’t want to embarrass the parties any further by acting like it ever happened — just like with Junaita Broaddrick. Liberals are real stand up people.

Well, remember, fathers, to make sure your daughters have self-respect and know how to use a gun. Then they won’t ever be a victim or vote Democrat — which is sort of the same thing.

The Democrats: “Vote like your lady parts depend on it, because your face definitely does.”