-Have you seen the size of most jury chairs vs. the size of Al gore?
-Because he sold out to Al Jazeera (and the network).
-They didn’t want to keep hearing him complain that the hot air from the lawyers was contributing to global warming.
-No landing strip for him to arrive by private jet every day.
-He was just too damn arrogant (a side effect of having been around the Clintons for so long)
… he’s a lawyer (should exempt anyone from critical decision-making).
… on the questionnaire he couldn’t decide on Gender.
He had a fever.
He insisted on carrying a hockey stick into the courtroom.
His carbon footprint was getting out of hand, if you know what I mean.
Failure to be a peer…to anything.
It was a breach-of-contract trial, and he doesn’t know anything about playing bridge.
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
THE MAN IS INSANE FOR CHRISSAKES!
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
He has a tendency to reach conclusions before all the evidence is in.
Every time a lawyer or the judge tried to ask him a question, he held up his hand and said, “The debate is OVER!”
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
judge afraid he would fiddle with the thermostat in the jury room constantly.
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
Court didn’t want to close for freezing temperatures and record amounts of snow.
walrus, just ice for all?
The defendant was named Chad.
Kept snickering whenever the word truth was spoken.
Kept asking what the definition of is is.
Kept opening his “judges” robe to give an early release to his inner chakra.
A pre-emptory challenge was used due to prejudice against defendants that are half man, half bear, and half pig.
because he kept repeating “poor polar bears” every time he was asked a question.
The judge allowed him to leave after he informed the courtroom of his quest to find ManBearPig
He kept claiming he was a citizen of Planet Zyphoid.
Al is so dull that the attorneys kept falling asleep during the voir dire.
…cause that guy will believe ANYTHING
…lack of healthy skepticism
@1 – Al isn’t a lawyer. He’s creepy, as are lawyers, but he manages to be creepy without being a lawyer.
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
He asked the judge if the evidence was secure in a lockbox.
During voir dire, Gore gave the lawyers character references from Jimmy Carter and Hillary Clinton.
It was a fraud case. Gore was too familiar with the concept.
Today’s special guest villains were Mr. Freeze and The Penguin. Nuff said.
Every time the lawyers talked about finding the “truth,” he corrected them, “You mean ‘narrative’?” (Unfortunately, yes – yes, they did.)
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
he had rhythm
kept asking that the jury be recounted.
Kept asking, “Is it hot in here, or is it just me?” Turned out to be just him.
He made one of those football, celebratory crötch moves, saying, “Is it too hot in here, or is it just me?”
…no matter how advanced their AI may be, robots are still not considered sentient beings.
Because Al finds telling the truth inconvenient.
He and another prospective juror by the name of Chad did not get along.
Dammit, DamnCat! You win. Have a catnip cookie.
Why was Al Gore rejected for jury duty?
-Have you seen the size of most jury chairs vs. the size of Al gore?
-Because he sold out to Al Jazeera (and the network).
-They didn’t want to keep hearing him complain that the hot air from the lawyers was contributing to global warming.
-No landing strip for him to arrive by private jet every day.
-He was just too damn arrogant (a side effect of having been around the Clintons for so long)
@24 Cookies to Da**cat!!!!!!
That was classic. Awesome!
Being part of a controlling legal authority seriously messes with his chakras.
He’s too
judgementalWorried about the environmental damage from him flying in on his jet everyday.
He wouldn’t stop talking about Global Warming. And the size of his chakra.