“I’d like to buy a copy of the Steele Dossier, please.”
“I’ve got it right here – this is a government clearinghouse of irrelevant and inaccurate information, after all…”
“The expurgated version, please.”
“The expurgated version?”
“The one without the piss tape.”
“The one without the piss tape? They’ve all got it! This is the standard work of Democrat disinformation to bolster the Russian collusion story… Why would you possibly want that removed?”
“It offends me that they wet their nest!”
“All right! [*Sounds of tearing *] There’s your Dossier – now, buy it!”
“I can’t buy that one, it’s torn.”
“Well, there must be something we can sell you – this is a lie shop, after all… How about some juicy Kavanaugh scandals, how Antifa is a peaceful organization, Cuomo trustworthiness?”
“No, no…”
“What about how the deteriorating border situation is all Trump’s fault?”
“No, no one would buy that… we get crap like that free, every day from all the media sources.”
“Sorry we couldn’t be more help. It’s a shame! We ARE a disinformation shop, after all… Without the FBI, we wouldn’t have any gullible customers left…”
“I’d like to buy a copy of the Steele Dossier, please.”
“I’ve got it right here – this is a government clearinghouse of irrelevant and inaccurate information, after all…”
“The expurgated version, please.”
“The expurgated version?”
“The one without the piss tape.”
“The one without the piss tape? They’ve all got it! This is the standard work of Democrat disinformation to bolster the Russian collusion story… Why would you possibly want that removed?”
“It offends me that they wet their nest!”
“All right! [*Sounds of tearing *] There’s your Dossier – now, buy it!”
“I can’t buy that one, it’s torn.”
“Well, there must be something we can sell you – this is a lie shop, after all… How about some juicy Kavanaugh scandals, how Antifa is a peaceful organization, Cuomo trustworthiness?”
“No, no…”
“What about how the deteriorating border situation is all Trump’s fault?”
“No, no one would buy that… we get crap like that free, every day from all the media sources.”
“Sorry we couldn’t be more help. It’s a shame! We ARE a disinformation shop, after all… Without the FBI, we wouldn’t have any gullible customers left…”
“Do you have any more of Hillary dodging sniper fire?’
“No…”
“Trump colluding with Russians?”
“No…”
“Biden marching with Nelson Mandela?”
“Mmm… no.”
“Kamala Fweedom?”
“No.”
“It’s not much of a lie shop, is it?”
“Well, it’s not the New York Times, squire.”