Straight Line of the Day: What Would You Put in a Relationship Contract?

OH MAN Girlfriend draws up 17-page ‘contract’ for man she’s been dating TWO WEEKS… including that he pays for everything
The Sun, UK | 10 Sep 2021 | Martha Cliff

A GIRLFRIEND drew up a 17-page ‘relationship contract’ with her boyfriend just two weeks after they met on Tinder – demanding he pay for date nights, buy flowers twice a month and work out five times a week.

Annie Wright first met her boyfriend Michael Head in October last year and after deciding he was ‘her person’ they agreed to be exclusive soon after.

Determined to make the relationship work after having her ‘boundaries crossed’ in a previous toxic relationship, 21-year-old Annie joked they should write down their ‘terms and conditions’ for dating – and law student Michael eagerly agreed.

Shortly after Annie and Michael, 23, sat down and read out their own terms – including asking for ‘a romantic gesture once every two weeks’ and ‘working out at least five times a week alone’.

Other clauses included ‘no silent treatment’ and him paying for date nights.

Now Annie credits the lengthy 17-page contract as the key to their relationship success and even suggested they might give each other a ‘yearly review’ when they celebrate their one-year anniversary next month.

Annie, from Atlanta, in Georgia, said: “This has been a game changer. I’d recommend all couples have one. It’s the best thing ever.

“I was still partying and I’m a junior in college. He was top of his class, very organised.

“I was like ‘this is the dude I want to marry but our lives don’t correlate well’.

Wait . . . are we sure “Michael” is his first name?

Friday Open Thread: The End of Morality

You’ll be relieved to know that I will no longer be harrassing you about morality.  I may harrass you, but not about that.

If you have hung in here this long, you will have already conquered the Big Three: not sinning, what to do with found money, and murder.

There is another consideration, though: what to do if there is no morality?

 

Priests will tell you this is bad business, and I assume prelates and confessors will as well. I’m not sure what rabbis do on their off-hours, but I highly suspect it is not wishing for all morality to come to an end. Imams? Meh. They’ve shown their stripes.

So what would happen if there is an end to morality?

 

We need look no further than Chicago, Los Angeles, Milwaukee, New Orleans, New York, New Jersey, and that place in Mad Max. You know, that guy from down Under. Great job, pal!

You must be able to defend yourself. What’s-His-Name in Mad Max could — in the movie — but can’t today, because they voluntarily surrendered their guns to the government.

Do not voluntarily surrender your guns to the government.

Have you ever seen a school board meeting, or a Homeowners’ Association, or contact tracers? Imagine them with guns, and you without.

I know the title of this was “The End of Morality,” but you see I am subtly advocating for more. It is a means to a useful end.  As I said only two paragraphs ago, “You must be able to defend yourself.” That is moral. Let’s say a weirdo is approaching with murder in his eyes. Do you want to stop him, or contemplate government programs that may or may not help him? Since you are alive, I assume the former would be your answer.

To conclude: if your government shows no morality, you must.

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Do you have something you’d like to share? A link? A joke? Some words of wisdom? A topic to discuss? It’s our nightly Open Thread, and you have the floor.

 

 

Rock ‘n Roll Throwdown : 1950s

Let’s round out the Final Four.

Polls will close on Thursday September 23rd.

Match 1

Sha-Boom vs Blueberry Hill

Sha-Boom – The Chords

  • Defeated Please, please, please 47-18
  • Defeated That’s all right 33-29

VS

Blueberry Hill – Fats Domino

  • Defeated Money honey 54-9
  • Defeated Ain’t that a shame 38-27

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
98 votes · 98 answers

Match 2

I walk the line vs Fever

I walk the line – Johnny Cash

  • Defeated For your precious love 56-42
  • Defeated Roll over Beethoven 44-28

VS

Fever – Little Willie John

  • Defeated In the still of the night 64-44
  • Defeated I only have eyes for you 48-40

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
160 votes · 160 answers

Match 3

Bye bye love vs That’ll be the day

Bye bye love – Everly Brothers

  • Defeated 60 Minute Man 56-7
  • Defeated Mack the knife 40-30

VS

That’ll be the day – Buddy Holly

  • Defeated You Send Me 60-13
  • Defeated Don’t be cruel 42-30

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
94 votes · 94 answers

Match 4

Maybellene vs Folsom Prison Blues

Maybellene – Chuck Berry

  • Defeated Searchin’ 63-3
  • Defeated Yakety-Yak 48-22

VS

Folsom Prison Blues – Johnny Cash

  • Defeated Shake, Rattle and Roll 49-21
  • Defeated All shook up 39-31

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
106 votes · 106 answers

Thursday Night Open Thread: Not Particularly Funny

Even the New York Times is reporting this:

US drone strike that Pentagon said killed Kabul suicide bomber actually ‘killed aid worker and seven children who ran to greet him when he arrived home’: Video allegedly shows he filled car with water not explosives
Daily Mail | 10 September 2021 | Keith Griffith

The drone strike that the Pentagon claimed killed an ISIS-K suicide bomber in Kabul actually targeted an aid worker who had filled his car with water jugs, rather than explosives, according to a shocking new report.

Zemari Ahmadi, 43, was driving the 1996 Toyota Corolla that was destroyed in the August 29 drone strike, killing him and nine family members, including seven children, according to a New York Times investigation.

The Pentagon still maintains that only three civilians died, despite the family now detailing in the new report how their 10 relatives were killed in the blast.

Days after the attack, President Joe Biden gave a speech in which he marked the withdrawal of American troops in Afghanistan by the August 31 deadline. He touted America’s ability to strike terrorists and targets without boots on the ground. But he failed to mention the high civilian casualty rate from the August 29 drone strike, and he failed to mention that children had been killed.

Ahmadi worked for US-based aid group Nutrition and Education International, and spent the day running routine errands for the group, loading nothing into the car other than jugs full of water to bring home to his family, the Times reported, citing witnesses and surveillance video footage. 

‘All of them were innocent,’ Ahmadi’s brother Emal told the newspaper, noting that Ahmadi had sought refugee status with the US based on his international aid work. ‘You say he was ISIS, but he worked for the Americans.’  

Witnesses say he and his co-workers went to a Taliban-controlled police station that morning to request permission to distribute food to displaced refugees living in a nearby park. 

They returned to the offices at around 2pm, and surveillance footage shows that Ahmadi began filling up water jugs with a hose, which his family say he brought home from the office after water service was cut off in their neighborhood.

‘I filled the containers myself, and helped him load them into the trunk,’ a guard at the office told the Times.

US officials say that operator of the Reaper drone quickly scanned and saw only a single adult male greeting the vehicle, and therefore assessed with ‘reasonable certainty’ that no women, children or noncombatants would be killed.

A Hellfire missile struck the Corolla before its engine shut off. 

Ahmadi’s brother Romal was sitting on the ground floor with his wife when a sudden blast blew out the windows. They ran outside to discover a scene of devastation and death.

Six of those who died were inside the car, the others were in the garden of the home in the tightly-packed Khajeh Baghra neighbourhood. 

‘This was a righteous strike,’ said Joint Chiefs Chairman Mark A. Milley last week, claiming that Ahmadi was an ‘ISIS facilitator’.

‘It seriously questions the credibility of the intelligence or technology utilized to determine this was a legitimate target,’ Chris Cobb-Smith, a British Army veteran and security consultant, told the Times

Makes one want to throw up.

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Do you have something you’d like to share? A link? A joke? Some words of wisdom? A topic to discuss? It’s our nightly Open Thread, and you have the floor.

Spam! We Have a Possible Winner

In today’s trash:

Excellent beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your site, how could i subscribe for a weblog web site? The account aided me a applicable deal. I were a little bit familiar of this your broadcast offered shiny clear idea.

Depending on how she’d look in a knit miniskirt next to Bob Hope, we might have an apprentice in our future.

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On a side note, someone ought to tell these Chinese (or Japanese?) spammers that when they hear English-speakers talk like that, it’s a parody at best; it’s not how we really expect them to sound.

No Comment

‘Fully-Vaccinated’ Daily Wire Reporter Gets Covid for the Third Time (Pfizer’s Vaccine)
NOQ Report | 09/10/2021 | JD Rucker

Reporting on Covid-19 and the so-called “vaccines” is getting easier every day. As more people get vaccinated, there is no shortage of noteworthy breakthrough cases, adverse reactions, and generally bad news for those who have been jabbed. I don’t write that with any joy as an unvaccinated American. I’m just noting that from a journalistic perspective, the stories lately tend to write themselves.

The latest example comes from Tennessee where a reporter for the Daily Wire has become ill with Covid-19 for the third time despite being fully-vaccinated. Education reporter Chrissy Clark posted a little about her current situation on Twitter yesterday.

Well… after getting the Pfizer vaccine and having COVID twice, I have been diagnosed with COVID for a THIRD time.

Symptoms are bad this time around. Prayers are always appreciated.
— Chrissy Clark (@chrissyclark_) September 9, 2021

Staying positive in the ER, thanks for all your well wishes everyone 🤍
— Chrissy Clark (@chrissyclark_) September 9, 2021

Wednesday Night Space-Filler Until Midnight Special Comes Off Hiatus: “Crisis!!”

You want to talk about crises? I’ll give you a crisis:

Switzerland Is Running Out of Potato Chips Due to COVID and Poor Summer Weather
TheLocal.ch | 9 September 2021

2021’s mild summer has another victim: the humble potato chip.

As if the 2021 winter couldn’t get any worse, it’s now hitting us in the chip pocket.

Because of 2021’s constant rainfall and general poor weather, Switzerland’s potato harvest is disappointing.

When combined with a 30 percent increase in demand due to people sitting at home eating chips rather than going to restaurants, a chip shortage looms in Switzerland.

Sounds like a bunch of neutral people who can’t get Lay’s.

Rock ‘n Roll Throwdown : 1950s

We start our journey to the Final Four.

Polls will close on Tuesday September 21th.

Match 1

Johnny B. Goode vs Summertime Blues

Johnny B. Goode – Chuck Berry

  • Defeated Shout 75-36
  • Defeated Wake up little Susie 67-21

VS

Summertime Blues – Eddie Cochrane

  • Defeated Susie Q 75-19
  • Defeated Jailhouse Rock 52-37

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
93 votes · 93 answers

Match 2

Rock around the clock vs Whole lotta shakin’

Rock around the clock – Bill Haley

  • Defeated I’m Walking 66-38
  • Defeated What’d I say 58-31

VS

Whole lotta shakin’ – Jerry Lee Lewis

  • Defeated Goodnight, Sweetheart goodnight 78-25
  • Defeated Tutti-Frutti 67-15

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
90 votes · 90 answers

Match 3

Great Balls of Fire vs Rock ‘n Roll Music

Great Balls of Fire – Jerry Lee Lewis

  • Defeated Pledging my Love 72-1
  • Defeated Peggy Sue 55-33
https://youtu.be/BQa7wOu_I_A

VS

Rock ‘n Roll Music – Chuck Berry

  • Defeated Sweet Little 16 53-14
  • Defeated Rockin’ Pneumonia 60-18

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
89 votes · 89 answers

Match 4

Why Do fools fall in love vs Good Golly Miss Molly

Why do fools fall in love -Frankie Lymon

  • Defeated Rip it up 54-21
  • Defeated School Days 49-33

VS

Good Golly Miss Molly – Little Richard

  • Defeated Let the good times roll 59-11
  • Defeated Be-Bop-a-lula 59-24

This poll is no longer accepting votes

Which song do you prefer?
86 votes · 86 answers

Tuesday Night Open Thread: Omni Cum Laude

Best humor ever from the Babylon Bee (Smiley Face):

The Merit System in Academia Is Unjust Because It Rewards Productive Individuals, Professors Argue
Campus Reform | 09/09/2021 | Kate Anderson

Professors from the University of Arizona and the University of Colorado, Colorado Springs, are arguing that “success and merit” are “barriers” to the equity agenda.

“Admitting that the normative definitions of success and merit are in and of themselves barriers to achieving the goals of justice, diversity, equity and inclusion is necessary but not sufficient to create change,” professors Beth Mitchneck and Jessi L. Smith recently wrote for Inside Higher Education.

Oh, wait. It’s real. (Sad Face)

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Do you have something you’d like to share? A link? A joke? Some words of wisdom? A topic to discuss? It’s our nightly Open Thread, and you have the floor.