Avoid phrases you will only say once:
“Hold my beer and watch this.”
“You’re bluffing, that isn’t loaded.”
“Woohoo! Aces and Eights! All in!”
“I’m not worried. I have Obamacare.”
“I ain’t afraid of no ghosts.”
“Why are we wearing red shirts, and why did Kirk ask us to dig graves?”
“See Jackie, we didn’t need to put the bubbletop on the limousine.”
“I have evidence against Hillary.”
And these few precepts in thy memory
See thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
Nor any unproportioned thought his act.
Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
Of each new-hatch’d, unfledged comrade. Beware
Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in,
Bear’t that the opposed may beware of thee.
Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgment.
Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not express’d in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
For the apparel oft proclaims the man,
And they in France of the best rank and station
Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
I saw a YouTube clip where a scholar was saying that “people quote Polonius claiming ‘brevity being the soul of wit,’ without fully appreciating that Shakespeare was using it as a comedic introduction: Polonius then goes on to talk incessantly about Hamlet, until the queen finally just shuts him up.”
Never go to school, your job, or anywhere else if you’re sick with diarrhea just because you want to be a ‘RealTrooper.’
Always… no, never… don’t worry about it – you’ll catch on eventually…
Laugh, and the world laughs with you. cry… and you’ll get a million hits on TicTok…
Trust, but verify…
Something about gas station sushi.
Don’t have kids…only grandbabies (not sure of the logistics of this though).
Givers need to set limits, because takers don’t have any.
Extra helping: ~~~
Live as though today will be your last day, because someday you’re going to be right
Avoid phrases you will only say once:
“Hold my beer and watch this.”
“You’re bluffing, that isn’t loaded.”
“Woohoo! Aces and Eights! All in!”
“I’m not worried. I have Obamacare.”
“I ain’t afraid of no ghosts.”
“Why are we wearing red shirts, and why did Kirk ask us to dig graves?”
“See Jackie, we didn’t need to put the bubbletop on the limousine.”
“I have evidence against Hillary.”
If you have to ask how much, you’re probably bidding for an hour of my time at Christie’s
I could see Ginger or MaryAnn saying that, but Fangbeer?
Oh, so THAT’s why they call it an hourglass figure!!
I have more of a sundial figure.
Pendulum here, baby.
(Baby sucks the “L” out of “Clock.”)
And these few precepts in thy memory
See thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
Nor any unproportioned thought his act.
Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
Of each new-hatch’d, unfledged comrade. Beware
Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in,
Bear’t that the opposed may beware of thee.
Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgment.
Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not express’d in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
For the apparel oft proclaims the man,
And they in France of the best rank and station
Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Hey, that’s good! Someone should write that down!
I recognize that as the wholly original product of AI Shakespeare…
Haven’t seen the Bot in a while! Welcome back!
Trivia:
I saw a YouTube clip where a scholar was saying that “people quote Polonius claiming ‘brevity being the soul of wit,’ without fully appreciating that Shakespeare was using it as a comedic introduction: Polonius then goes on to talk incessantly about Hamlet, until the queen finally just shuts him up.”
Be polite to cops on the street, you can argue with them in court.
If you’re gonna do something dangerous and stupid, be smart and safe about it.
And get it on film. (Or video, we’re not picky.)
Always carry a baseball glove in your trunk along with your bat.