Scooby Doo: In todays reality, when you take the mask off, you don’t find a criminal mastermind that then goes to jail, you just find a useful idiot, who likely accuses you of some -ism related hate crime and you go to jail.
Beauty and the Beast: There are a lot of women who hooked up with an ugly, hairy, violent monster but are still waiting for him to suddenly change into Prince Charming.
The Little Mermaid: That one tried tricking us into thinking Gingers were good. Although… Ginger is pretty good, but push come to shove, I’d pick the brunette, Mary Ann.
I heard Biden is now a Spokesperson for Shotgun Dealers saying (for one million bucks)….”Buy a shotgun, you don’t need a hand gun or anything else. Just buy a shotgun jack!”
Roadrunner and Coyote – for thinking you can run off a cliff, and not fall until you notice that you are several hundred feet up in the air.
Also, coyotes can run at 40 mph, roadrunners top out at 25 mph, so it would have really been no contest. Also, roadrunners don’t eat birdseed. They eat lizards and stuff like that.
Not even a cheetah could catch a roadrunner because just as the cheetah is about to clamp down on him the roadrunner just flies up on a perch to get away and if there’s no perches in sight then, and only then, does he become dinner.
Lucy is a Karen of the worst kind. Charlie talks to his dog. Pig Pen may be the prototype of today’s homeless bum/addict/ne’er-do-well. There’s hope to be found in Peppermint Patty, as she exhibits no trans behavior, just tomboy ways that get misconstrued these days. Snoopy’s delusional Flying Ace is akin to Walter Mitty, suggesting the need for meds of some sort, or at least the need to lie down and talk about his childhood to a trusted mental health professional. Schroeder is a bright spot, as he’s a virtuoso without the ego or substance abuse issues, and he doesn’t take advantage of his groupie.
Mr. Pickles…need I say more? 🐶
Scooby Doo: In todays reality, when you take the mask off, you don’t find a criminal mastermind that then goes to jail, you just find a useful idiot, who likely accuses you of some -ism related hate crime and you go to jail.
Aladdin: Teaching young boys that if they steal enough, and rub one out enough times, they’ll get a beautiful Arabian Princess.
I’d settle for Barbara Eden if a Princess isn’t available though.
Beauty and the Beast: There are a lot of women who hooked up with an ugly, hairy, violent monster but are still waiting for him to suddenly change into Prince Charming.
The Little Mermaid: That one tried tricking us into thinking Gingers were good. Although… Ginger is pretty good, but push come to shove, I’d pick the brunette, Mary Ann.
Looney Tunes, for constantly making a mockery of proper gun etiquette…
I heard Biden is now a Spokesperson for Shotgun Dealers saying (for one million bucks)….”Buy a shotgun, you don’t need a hand gun or anything else. Just buy a shotgun jack!”
What’s the .410 percent for the Big Guy?
Spongebob for putting obnoxious stupidity on a pedestal.
Yeah — that’s our job!
Anything with anvils.
Roadrunner and Coyote – for thinking you can run off a cliff, and not fall until you notice that you are several hundred feet up in the air.
Also, coyotes can run at 40 mph, roadrunners top out at 25 mph, so it would have really been no contest. Also, roadrunners don’t eat birdseed. They eat lizards and stuff like that.
Not even a cheetah could catch a roadrunner because just as the cheetah is about to clamp down on him the roadrunner just flies up on a perch to get away and if there’s no perches in sight then, and only then, does he become dinner.
Captain Planet, for propagandizing a whole generation into believing that the climate is in crisis…
“Steamboat Willy”, Walt Disney, 1928, started all this cartoon crap.
Popeye. I mean, have you ever opened a can of spinach? Did it make you strong? No. But, did it make you gag?
The work produced by the first mangaka that thought to himself, “Self, I’ll bet there’s a market for something a bit weirder involving octopi”
And that very night, “The Dream of the Fisherman’s Wife” was born; dooming generations of Japanese men to some pretty weird fetishes.
Fisherman’s Wife: “I just wanted to cuddle, fish.”
In reality, do not stand in an enclosed room with a totally confused moose. Do not throw a squirrel out of a high window.
And if you piss off Mr Big there are no second chances.
I’m torn on submitting Peanuts for consideration.
Lucy is a Karen of the worst kind. Charlie talks to his dog. Pig Pen may be the prototype of today’s homeless bum/addict/ne’er-do-well. There’s hope to be found in Peppermint Patty, as she exhibits no trans behavior, just tomboy ways that get misconstrued these days. Snoopy’s delusional Flying Ace is akin to Walter Mitty, suggesting the need for meds of some sort, or at least the need to lie down and talk about his childhood to a trusted mental health professional. Schroeder is a bright spot, as he’s a virtuoso without the ego or substance abuse issues, and he doesn’t take advantage of his groupie.
And if Charlie Brown got hearing aids, he’d understand adults a lot better.
I watch South Park and Archer and a lot of other animated shows. Nothin’. I got nothing’.