I ran out of gas. I… I had a flat tire. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts. It wasn’t my fault. I swear to god!
Made a big mistake during the whole month of June … ignored the rainbow flag wavers at our own peril, and now nothing “straight” ends up getting done. D’oh!!
In honor of Stallone’s 80th birthday, I was watching a Rocky marathon. At the rate this is going, there won’t be an SLotD tomorrow or Wednesday either.
You went to the Trump 4th of July Bash…got way too drunk….then got punched out by an Antifa Protestor on your way out.
The emu ate my homework
Adjustment for Earth curvature
Trump
I ran out of gas. I… I had a flat tire. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts. It wasn’t my fault. I swear to god!
Sometimes the 4th of July is just so great it takes more than one day to celebrate.
Interns got your tongue?
Made a big mistake during the whole month of June … ignored the rainbow flag wavers at our own peril, and now nothing “straight” ends up getting done. D’oh!!
You ran into the Yak, and it held a grudge.
You found a sheleighly and have been seeking it’s owner.
Extra ~~~~
An incorrect understanding of “independence” that doesn’t include “duty”, “honor” and “faithfulness “…
They don’t release prisoners from county jail on bond early enough on Monday mornings after a holiday…
All correct so far.
I was taking lingerie measurements.
Trump didn’t call to get my Red Card overturned.
IMAO got a new NSA monitor, and I had to help with his orientation.
I was on my way to bring evidence to a grand jury in Chappaqua and I haven’t been heard from since
Manmade Global Climate Change
2 words:
Bourbon
In honor of Stallone’s 80th birthday, I was watching a Rocky marathon. At the rate this is going, there won’t be an SLotD tomorrow or Wednesday either.
Plead the 5th of July.
You used your floppy disk to hide a hotdog from Joey Chestnut.
Donald Trump insists on his signature being at the top of IMAO logo.
It’s the quarterfinals of the Passive-Aggressive Olympics.
Paul Pelosi ran over your keyboard.
Clock was set for Greenwich Mean Line.
Pausing to look back at Lou Gehrig and Cal Ripken.
I’m on strike until USPS delivers my Anonymiss cookies
You finally ran out of the stockpile Basil, no Basil, left us.