Friday Night Open Thread: Killing Baby Hitler

Well, here we are again with another fun moral dilemma: if you could go back in time, should you kill Baby Hitler?

Yes.

A contrasting viewpoint might be ignored. Or it might be: “But he’s so little and cute, and does possess the potential to not be a monster. Are you going to kill someone who hasn’t done evil yet?”

Yup.

“But he’s just a baby.”

Don’t care. I come from the future. He’s Hitler.

“But someone worse could take his place.”

Yeah, right. He’s literally Hitler.

“What about Himmler?”

No charisma. No chin. Could never have mobilized the nation and its army, industry, working class, middle class, upper class, and financiers. Hitler did.

I hope this ends all debate on this not-so-vexing question. It’ll save a lot of time for future ethicists and their mealy-mouthed, kowtowing students. Remember, Bill Clinton was re-elected on his ethics. That says a lot about ethics.

Next week we may look at whether you should give your seat in a lifeboat on the Titanic to women and children. (Spoiler: The answer is also yes.) And if Hitler is paddling toward your boat (he would have turned 23 five days earlier), you should clobber him repeatedly with an oar for being a racist coward murderous bastard ****.

Now, I can anticipate a lot of counter-reasoning from the WWJD (What Would Jesus Do?) crowd, and I have no counter-counter-argument. Too many counters. Since I’m not Jesus, I must (in poker terms) check to the Raiser.

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Do you have something you’d like to share? A link? A joke? Some words of wisdom? A topic to discuss? It’s our nightly Open Thread, and you have the floor.

11 Comments

  1. The last time anyone went back and tried to kill baby Hitler, they were unsuccessful. The Hitlers were on vacation. But the timeline got screwed up anyway, and things started to get weird. Now look at what’s in the White House.

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