Prank your future self by wasting your life
— donni (@donni) June 3, 2015
The first US copyright law turned 225 this week! Happy birthday to it but DO NOT SING THE SONG IT IS VERY TOUCHY ABOUT THE SONG
— Parker Higgins (@xor) June 3, 2015
*pulls out list of Stuff I Don't Care About*
*crosses off Bruce Jenner*
*adds Caitlyn Jenner*
— rainer fm (@rainerfm) June 4, 2015
Fireman: This is the perfect building for a firehouse, but there's not enough room for stairs
Stripper: I have an idea
— ♡ Brian Essbe ♡ (@SortaBad) June 5, 2015
Grammar mistakes in quotes are disgusting. They make me [sic]
— Thomas Cavin (@torneyatclaw) June 5, 2015
if you forget the plays, and sonnets, and his london theater and all those words he made up, shakespeare did almost nothing. he was a nobody
— John V. (@wettbutt) June 6, 2015
How about a body swap movie about a workaholic mom who HATES murder and a professional assassin with an important murder due THIS WEEK!
— Matt Roller (@rolldiggity) June 6, 2015