Got Your Goat

This story seems like a good opportunity to make fun of lesser cultures, but what if criminals actually were able to use black magic to turn into goats to avoid prosecution? Currently, our legal system is incapable of handling goats in a criminal manner, but apparently Nigeria has at least thought that out. I guess the next step it to compel the goat to turn back into a person, but I’m not sure how you bring that matter before a judge. And you’ll need some sort of hard evidence that the goat is really a human in a magical disguise. Would that take black magic? And would is it illegal to use black magic even if it were in the pursuit of justice?

It’s complicated. I guess this is really more of a matter for the Volokh Conspiracy than my blog.

22 Comments

  1. If he turned into a goat would he than have the intelligence of a goat and forget how to use his black magic thus leaving him stuck as a goat?

    [Your ignorance of black magic is appalling. -Ed.]

  2. Well we may not have ways to deal with criminals that can change themselves into a goat, but we are getting close with that story yesterday where some nut job submitted a guilty plea for killing her child on the condition that it be withdrawn if the child resurrects in accordance to her cults teachings.

  3. Why not believe it? Our current POTUS is a weasel that was magically transformed into human form.
    I just happened to catch the original “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” last night. It’s amazing. I think they were not only warning us about what was happening to Hollywood, but the onslaught of liberals and the eventual Obamanation…they’re all pod people!

  4. Just wow! I would expect this kind of behavioral deviance from a kenyan, but nigerians aren’t usually devolved enough to have stupid thoughts. Maybe if they were not so busy becomming goats, they would have time to evolve.

  5. A goat is a meat source, not a criminal. Barbecue the goat, and if the criminal shows up later, prosecute the criminal.

    If the criminal actually did turn into a goat, too bad. It is still tasty cabrito!

  6. Actually, isn’t it fascinating that Chiefs on US naval vessels are referred to as “Old Goats.” And the compartment where they sleep is called the “Goat Locker.” (I would not want to be an Old Goat in a Goat Locker.)

    With this fact in mind, please take the following Quiz and substitute the correct word for goat in the following (warning, they get progressively harder):

    1. A goat in the hand is worth two in the goat.
    2. You drive me up a goat!
    3. The third time’s a goat.
    4. Don’t take away my goat. I need my goat!
    5. You want the goat? You can’t handle the goat!
    6. You’re young and on your first set of goats.
    7. If you go to bed with goats, you’ll get up with goats.

    So, umm… How’d you do?

  7. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » I Hope He Fails

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