PG-13

We say IMAO is a PG-13 site in that we’ll allow some bawdy language but we’d rather you not go crazy with it. Also, young children really shouldn’t be reading about politics without parental supervision. Interestingly, though, I saw this post of listed reasons for an MPAA rating. Apparently you can get a PG-13 rating for “non-stop ninja action”.

So that’s why IMAO is a PG-13 site: Non-stop ninja action.

27 Comments

  1. Ill check the old testament but I recall it saying for tween movies:

    Then Moses said to those worshiping the rated R calf: Some side boob less then 4 F bombs none used as a verb and no beavers or dongs. Am I missing anything?

  2. Dammit Jim. I’m a doctor not a theater critic.

    Is that PG-13, Frank?

    I always go by what sounds appropriate moderated by good judgment (or WordPress’s mysterious list of forbidden words like “pron” and “whõre,” etc.)

  3. How’s this for PG-13?
    Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the english language today, is the word f–k. Out of all the english words that begin with the letter “f” …f–k is the only word refered to as ‘the f-word… It’s the one magical word. Just by its sound it can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. F–k, as most words in the english language, is derived from the German …the word fuieken, which means to strike.
    In English, f–k falls into many grammatical categories:

    As a transitive verb for intance …John f–ked Shirley.
    As an intransitive verb…Shirley f–ks.

    Its meaning is not always sexual, it can be used as…

    An adjective such as …John’s doing all the f–king work.
    As part of an adverb …Shirley talks too f–king much.
    As an adverb enhancing an adjective …Shirley is f–king beautiful.
    As a noun …I don’t give a f–k.
    As part of a word …absof–kinglutely -or- inf–kingcredible.
    And as almost every word in a sentence …F–k the f–king f–kers ( this is one of my personal favorites…zzyzx).

    As you must realize, there aren’t too many words with the versatility of f–k…such as these examples describing situations such as:

    Fraud …I got f–ked at the used car lot.
    Dismay …ahhh f–k it.
    Trouble …I guess I’m really f–ked now.
    Agression …Don’t f–k with me buddy.
    Difficulty …I don’t understand this f–king question.
    Inquiry …Who the f–k was that?
    Dissatisfaction …I don’t like what the f–k is going on here.
    Incompetance …He’s a f–k-off.
    Dismissal …Why don’t you go outside and play hide and go f–k yourself…

    I’m sure you can think of many more examples.
    With all these multi-purpose applications, how can anyone be offended when you use the word. We say use this unique, flexible word more often in your daily speech.
    It will identify the quality of your character immediately.
    Say it loudly and proudly…
    …F–K YOU!!

  4. I’m picturing Vanilla Ice from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze – “Ninja, Ninja RAP! Ninja, Ninja RAP! GO Ninja Go Ninja, GO!”
    Of course, the dance is even better than the lyrics.

    What, like no one else remembers the early 90s?

  5. @zzyzx: Do you know that that originally came from a classic bit from James Wagner whose voice we all recognize as the voice of Disney? Anyhoo Jame’s Wagner’s History of the F-Word is classic. Wagner’s serious voice against the script above is quite a hoot.

    Warning: the link will start an audio that is not safe for work; it ain’t likely safe for home when your girlfriend or wife is around. Heck, the actual URL ain’t even safe.

  6. I had a patient in the Emergency Room one night, young lady of 17 or so from a motor vehicle accident. Dad came in to see her (with her permission) and we were cleaning her up. When we rolled her over to clean her back she had a tattoo in the classic “tramp stamp” position, beautiful olde english lettering, boldly stating “BORN TO F—“. Words cannot express his expression.

  7. Well.
    Finally I am beginning to understand why every time I visit your site, I end up having to remove a couple dozen throwing stars from the wall behind the monitor.
    I am getting pretty sick and tired of constantly having to patch the drywall, mister.

  8. You do know that a movie can say F–k once and still be PG-13, it’s that second time that gets it the R-Rating. However you can’t say F–k once on tv even on shows rated TVMA, which brings to question why they have those arbitrary ratings anyway.

  9. Speaking of foul language, my family stopped for gas in CT on the way up to our little cottage here in Maine. A gentleman pulls up, steps out, and says “Holy s***, welcome to Connecticut!” upon seeing how much higher the gas prices were thanks to taxes. The taxes didn’t stop most of CT from looking like a parking lot.

  10. #4 EnemyoftheState says:
    My wife said my site is PG. I asked if she meant because of the content. She said “yes, Pretty Goofy.”

    Yeah, this place is Pretty Goofy (PG), too. There’s a certain freedom in being able to go PG any time you want at a place like this.

    “Crazzle razzle frazzle crazzer ranz.” (from an old cartoon)

  11. Sheryl Crow in concert: Rated PG-13 for mediocre music and use of recycled toilet paper (one square at a time)
    The United States Congress: Rated PG for portrayals of developmentally challenged senior citizens and baby boomers.
    Colorado Republican Governor Primary: Rated NC-17 for graphic depiction of political suicide.

  12. @ Obamaaintmymama: Did the Sheryl Crow reference come from Friday’s Redeye? Gutfeld ripped on Sheryl Crow’s 2 1/2 page environmental rider that she’s attached to her appearance contract:

    Gutfeld Rips Crow

    Forget about bowls of green M&M’s, energy saving light bulbs, post recycled toilet paper and non-petroleum cups are demanded. Please, oh please let an informed staffer leave 3 pieces of post recycled toilet paper in her bathroom.

  13. Ooops, should be:

    Forget about bowls of green M&M’s. Energy saving light bulbs, post recycled toilet paper and non-petroleum cups are demanded. Please, oh please let an informed staffer leave 3 pieces of post recycled toilet paper in her bathroom.

    I knew it didn’t look right. Sometimes puntumication is important.

  14. I dunno. There’s an award with a ninja wailing on an Eddie Van Halen-style 80’s axe… and the “Chuck Norris will allow your blog to live Award” … but non-stop ninja action? I detect at least a few pauses. Hell, if this WERE non-stop ninja action I ought not to detect ANYTHING.

  15. How about a rating of MP-60, whereby you must have an IQ of more than 60 to watch a left-wing political propaganda film (often falsely categorized as “documentaries” by the Academy)? It would put an end to the mass hysteria of the mentally-challenged who have believed that Michael Moore was really handed a gun when he opened up a bank account or that Al Gore knew what he was talking about when spouting falsified data about the world turning into a fireball because I use the wrong type of light bulb.

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