Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro urged his urged his nation to be on guard against the threat of President Trump ordering an invasion of Venezuela.
Apparently he’s never met Trump. He’s not going to invade. He’ll buy that stinking rathole country for a song then build a casino on it.
Why, we got more oil than they do these days so what would be the point? Frankly a couple of smart bombs targeted to his Presidential Palace would suffice. Let the Venezuelans sort it out after that.
At the current exchange rate, it would probably take only one verse of a song.
“…He’ll buy that stinking rathole country for a song then ”
Rip out the old kitchen and replace it with granite counter tops and stainless steel appliances. Replace the tile in the bathrooms. Paint the place some trendy color and add some fresh mulch to the landscaping. Once all of that is done he will mark the place up 130% and start an imaginary bidding war between the potential buyers and make a very substantial profit on the place when it finally sells for triple the market value.
And for the post-credit bump…. a new US ally in South America.