A good rule of thumb is anyone cheering on the death of a political opponent is someone who in no circumstances you ever want wielding power.

I don’t have any opinion on “monkey this up,” but I did invent a device called the “Up Monkey” — a cannon that fires monkeys (capuchin or smaller) high up into the air. It has no practical use but it’s very popular.

I’ll debate Ted Cruz. I’ll steer every question to The Last Jedi, though. If you liked The Last Jedi, I don’t want your vote.

CUOMO: “Can you stop interrupting”
NIXON: “Can you stop lying?”
CUOMO: gets so close their noses touch “NEVER!”

From what we’ve seen so far, scientists give only a 0.03% chance of that live action Teen Titans show not being terrible.

I thought the only people who read comic books are movie producers.

How are we supposed to know when Democrats really think a Republican is racist versus their almost reflexive calling all Republicans racist?

This was a big problem of theirs with Trump.
“Trump is a huge racist!”
“You mean just like Mitt Romney?”
“Well… um… yeah… but for real this time!”

I don’t know if people really think DeSantis is a racist or their just jumping on him because they have an avenue of attack. It’s impossible to tell. There is no sincerity left at the avenue of partisanship and racism.

Man reads the newspaper
In slow motion we see the In-N-Out cup fall from his hand
He frantically scans the news
The cup collides with ground, spilling soda everywhere
We see the headline “In-N-Out Donates to GOP”
Pan in on the cup revealing a Bible verse on its bottom

Ironically, the easiest way these days to get people to act like Nazis towards a group is to convince people that group is a bunch of Nazis. “Those people are Nazis; let’s round them up into camps!” doesn’t sound too ridiculous.

“Monkey” is kind of a dangerous word because it’s a really fun word in most contexts, but it’s always just inches away from being really racist.

Healthcare is a modern privilege.

Why wouldn’t they just have an American cut of First Man where we see the flag planted on the moon accompanied by the theme to Team America?

If I were to rewrite the moon landing, an evil commie would stow aboard the module and Armstrong kicks the commie out the door as they land on the moon and then finishes the commie off by planting the flag on the moon through his chest.

I got some info from an inside source on what happened with the flag scene on First Man. Ends up, they did their research wrong and had Gosling plant the MTV flag when filming. The error wasn’t noticed until editing and by then it was too late and the scene had to be cut.

We don’t even know if it’s scientifically possible for a non-American to go to the moon. It’s never happened.

The actors union would be a great place to try socialism. One actor earning $20 million could be redistributed to give hundreds of struggling actors a living wage.

What baffles me are all the people protective of The Last Jedi. It’s like prequel criticism if Jar Jar Binks were in some protected class no one was supposed to insult.

Good ole Jack Ryan, defeating evil with his wholesome American-ness.

I don’t get the mixed reviews on Jack Ryan; I really liked it. Looked pretty expensive, too.
Jack Ryan has 72% on RottenTomatoes, but it has 90% audience score which seems more correct.

You may not like Trump, but we did a nationwide search for a United States President, and he was the best we could find. So I think you should support him.

Mod Pizza is cool. One price, and all the toppings you want. Gets Fleming family seal of approval.

Pizza almost never occurs naturally in nature. Over 90% of pizza in the world is man made.

I don’t have any opinion on Colin Kaepernick other than that someone once said he looks like Sideshow Bob and now I can’t stop thinking that every time I see him.

A New Yorker festival? Yeah, even Steve Bannon doesn’t deserve to be subjected to that.

I’ve never quite understood what section of the Pledge of Allegiance Colin Kaepernick was protesting, but I’ve always liked his moxie.

There are only two types of people:
1. People I agree with
2. People so terrible that we should shun anyone who is even ever slightly nice to them

Funny how Howard morphed from being the villain in the first season to the one who seems most like an innocent bystander in the series. #BetterCallSaul

So what’s a Handmaid do? Clean hands? That sounds like a pretty easy job. So what’s their problem?

My favorite show right now is Better Call Saul, so if I go to a protest, I’m going to dress up as Nacho.

One thing I feel blessed by is what a rich, peaceful nation we live in despite the fact our government is very very very dumb from top to bottom.

We just shut down the Senate. The whole thing is dumb. I can’t believe we pay any of those people money.

Good political strategy. Corey Booker called Kavanaugh “A no good, yellow-bellied cur!” and when Kavanaugh turned around to sock him, Booker held up a baby so now we have it on video of Kavanaugh punching a baby.

Wearing a shirt is a symbol of white power. If you see anyone wearing a shirt, they’re probably a Ku Klux Nazi.