My other three kids adore their baby brother Winchester to the point it’s pretty annoying when you try to hold him. I think only our oldest understands about Down syndrome, which just means she’s extra encouraging.

Winchester loves his mommy!
And he’s aware he has a father 🙁
Well, I can keep him entertained for a few minutes, and then he’s like, “Where’s the other one?”

The third season of Halt & Catch Fire was interesting. And for some reason, it was just weird to see Matthew Lillard playing a middle-aged executive.
Those last two episodes of the season were kind of odd. Each felt like it’s own combination of season finale/season premiere.

How long have neo-Nazis been around? Not really “neo” anymore, are they?

If it was a popular vote contest in 2016, I wonder who would have won?
We’ll never know!

I have to hand it to the NBA and Blizzard—they’ve united the right and the left. That’s pretty rare these days.

JARED LETO JOKER: “Wait till they get a load of me.”
AUDIENCE: “We got a load of you, and it was underwhelming. We’re moving on to the next Joker.”
JARED LETO JOKER: “Aw.”

APPLE: “What do you want? Freedom? Or how about instead… a fourth camera on your iPhone?”

Marriage is a religious ceremony. That it’s between one man and one woman is religious view. That it could be with a different number or different genders are other religious views. The government would be taking a religious stance to treat one view as superior to the others.

Why would Greta Thunberg deserve a Nobel Peace Prize? All she did was cause people who already believed one thing to briefly become even more irritating about it.
Still, that’s technically more than what Obama did when he won his.

“The Force Awakens sure set up some intriguing plot points.”
Rian Johnson takes those plot points and stomps them to pieces
“Oh. At least there will be more Admiral Ackbar, right?”
“I’m killing him off screen.”
“Why do you hate Star Wars?”
“I LOVE IT MORE THAN YOU DO!”

When I was in college, Norm MacDonald came to my campus. I bought a ticket to his show, but I was studying so hard I forgot to go. I mean, I have a great career now, but I could have seen Norm MacDonald.

How come whenever a white male is in a movie, he has to be the Joker? I’d like my sons to be able to see some positive portrayals of white males in the media.

I guess a difference between The Empire Strikes Back and The Last Jedi is that no one ever felt the need to memorize a number of apologetics to explain why The Empire Strikes Back is in fact a good movie and not a terrible one.

El Camino was really just like an extended episode of Breaking Bad, but since it’s a really good episode of one of the best TV series ever, that’s not really a complaint.
Also, it really reinforces that Aaron Paul needs a great new role. He is excellent.

I just don’t get caring about billionaires. I wrote about this absurdity in “The Demon Capitalism.” Compared to most of human history, I live in absurd luxury, but I’m supposed to be all upset because someone else has a lot more than my vast wealth?

I noticed my 6yo son was looking cooler. Ends up he got a scrape under his lower lip and it scabbed up and now looks like he has a soul patch.

My son noticed my Babylon Bee hoodie and asked “Is it called the Bible-on Bee because Satan is in it?” I didn’t know what to say to that.

I saw that video and it was pretty scary. If I were the logo for the Vox website, I’d be really afraid of the president shooting me in the head in a church.
It’s another stupid, Trump-worshipping video. You can completely freak out about it, though, but it would just give people more reason to not take you seriously… if anyone is left taking you seriously.
He didn’t shoot The Babylon Bee in the head, did he?
In summary: Everyone chillax like me, the most reasonable person on the internet.

I thought that scene from the Kingsmen was kind of disturbing when I saw it in the movie, but I think the edited version is as likely to inspire violence against journalists as the original inspired violence against Westboro Baptist or other churches.
For the most part, I don’t think we’re very good at figuring out what can inspire crazy people to be violent.

I already knew that out of the gate Disney+ would have tons of A+ content, but it’s great they’ve revealed it will also have a ton of forgettable garbage.

Owning a cat is a bit like having a ghost in your house. It’s this entity you just see every so often and often you’ll just hear some big clatter somewhere in the middle of the night.

Who exactly is the audience for GQ?

My 6yo son gets really hyper any time he has a double espresso.
I keep asking the Starbucks to stop giving him those — or at least charge him for them — but they keep saying “no” and that they “hate me.”
What do I say to that? “Don’t hate me.”? I can’t make a good argument for that.

I guess I’m not caring and compassionate enough to keep getting angry at a chicken sandwich.

If you don’t monitor what’s influencing your kids online, they could end up a part of some fascist organization like the neo-Nazis or the NBA.

I never quite cared for Jack in Supernatural—didn’t hate him, just was meh—but demon Jack demonstrates the problem was how the character was written and not the actor because I like demon Jack.

A really rich guy saying he can’t speak out against brutal oppression because he might lose money probably ain’t a great look.

They’re all terrible idiots and their objective is to trick people into thinking they’re not terrible idiots. And a depressing amount of people still fall for it.

Taxes are the least way the rich contribute to society. Actually, it’s the least way most people contribute.
Except politicians. I want a wealth tax on politicians. I’m very suspicious of all the wealth they’ve accumulated.