When Redskins Cry

ASHBURN, VA (IMAO News) — The NFL’s Washington franchise announced their long-anticipated name change today, removing the nickname that predates the team’s time in the nation’s capital. Team owner Dan Snyder made the announcement after days of speculation.

“We decided to do several things with this unique opportunity,” Snyder told reports at the team’s office in Ashburn, Virginia. “What began as a botched arrest by a crew of police officers consisting of a black man, an Hispanic man, an Asian man, and a white man, was refactored as a black versus white issue. In keeping with that spirit, we have decided to participate in the new narrative, and take it to the next step of opposing racism by removing a logo that was designed by a Native American person.”

The Team Formerly Known As The Redskins

Snyder said it was important to return the focus to the original event that began the latest round of outrage. “George Floyd was from Minneapolis, so it’s appropriate we honor that connection with a new logo that celebrates that fact. The most famous person of color from Minneapolis was certainly the great entertainer Prince. Our Washington NFL franchise has licensed the logo of this great artist to help keep this front and center to all of our fans,” Snyder added. “From this day forward, we’ll simply be this unpronounceable symbol.”

The Team Formerly Known As The Redskins opens their NFL preseason schedule on August 15 with a game against the Tennessee Titans at FedEx Field in Landover, Maryland. The team is expected to be sporting the new logo for the game.

Reports indicate that a further review of the use of “Washington” is also being conducted and team officials will announce a new city name the team will play under as well.

7 Comments

  1. I’d suggest they call them the Washington Bullets.
    That would make DC fans happy, or at least as happy as they could be at losing the current name, and tick off all the right people.
    I predict a lack of sales of new jerseys and a run on Skins jerseys in local stores.

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