I take one day off for a family emergency, and look what you blockheads go and do while my back is turned!!!

I’ll have you know, I had to take one of my sweet little kitty cats, Hillary, to her therapist again Tuesday after she saw that awful manchild the Russians installed as our President’s face on TV, and it took the whole day to get her calmed down. Poor thing. She just hasn’t been the same since that awful election!

I had to sit there under the watchful eye of the wonderful Dr. Karen Baucha, stroking my sweet little pussy for hours just to get her to stop twitching. Then, I took her home to all her sweet sisters and we all sang to her and I assured over and over again it would be alright… even though I knew it was a lie. Dear Gaia, give me strength!

Then, today, I am trying to catch up on my important work of keeping an eye out for Truth™, and I start reading this ridiculous excuse for a blog, and what do I find???

Guns being pointed at Our President!!! No, not Drumpf, our real, actual President!!!

I am so going to have you arrested for that “Oppo”… just as soon as I doxx you! You can’t hide from the TURDS, we know all, see all and hear all! Fear us!!!

And as if that weren’t enough, I find that preposterous oaf Harvey has been at it again, after I specifically gave him a time out mind you, publishing not just one, but two absurdly fact-challenged articles the last two days. The unmittigated gall of that man!!!

ACLU Sues Steinway Because Piano Has Only 36 Black Keys

Here I see a wonderful article about the marvelous ACLU suing in the name of Social Justice, and the whole thing turns out to be yet another fraud! No truth to it at all!

The so-called attorneys discussed in the article? Lionel Hutz was a character from the Simpsons, and Paul Biegler was from Anatomy of a Murder! There is such a thing as Google, Mr. Olson, and I do know how to use it!!!

But that wasn’t even the worst of it…

AOC Proposes Balanced Budget After Being Bitten by Radioactive Accountant

Do I even have to discuss this? Seriously?

Another assault on this wonderful, amazing young woman? Radioactive accountants???

While it is true that Rep. Ocasio-Cortez does, in fact, have super-powers, they come to her naturally by being a woman of color rising from the relentless oppression of The Patriarchy and White Supremacy that has ruled our country since its misbegotten founding, not from the pages of some silly comic book aimed at white male adolescents.

Mr. Olson, I can see you are bound and determined to make life difficult for me, but beware… I will stay on you like a canker sore until you bend to the will of the TURDS! Now cease and desist with this behavior at once, Mister!!!

Who is Frieda N. Trood?

This “article” published earlier today by Mr. Harvey Olson is so egregiously false as to cause one’s head to explode with rage:

Judge Orders Gillette to Pay Reparations To Men Who Threw Away Fortune In Razors After Toxic Masculinity Ad

One day on the job and here I am dealing with such falderal! Have you no shame?

I have scoured reliable news sources and found no mention of such judgment against Proctor & Gamble or its subsidiary Gillette. As far as I can tell, Judge Roy Bean, who has been the subject of old movies and TV shows, passed away over 116 years ago in March, 1903!!!

Furthermore, they are perfectly right to criticize men for toxic masculinity, as it is a terrible scourge on our society and must be wiped out! $8 billion is a small price to pay for Social Justice!

Really, when are you going to realize you can’t get away with this clear disregard for The Truth™ any longer? Now, go to your room, Mister! You are getting a time out!!!

Who is Frieda N. Trood?

In our on-going efforts to prevent clearly false information from being spread unchecked on the Internet, and thereby unduly interfering in our long-treasured system of Democratcy, Snoops.com, the self-annointed final arbiter on what is or is not truly true to The Truth™, has been given full access to this blatantly Truth™ offending blog by direct order of the Tribunal Unmoved by Right-wing Demands for Speech, or, TURDS!

We have assigned one of our ace fact-checkers, Frieda N. Trood, to monitor this site on a full-time basis to ensure its readers will no longer be fooled by the posting of clearly false or misleading stories under the guise of “satire” or “humor.” Since everyone knows that no one on the Right has any sense of humor that anyone who matters is aware of, we have taken it upon ourselves to clean up the Internet of attacks on The Truth™ using such flimsy excuses.

Ms. Trood will be free and unencumbered to post as she sees fit, fact-checking random items found on this site which she sees as a threat to Our Democratcy. Bloggers and commenters alike are duly warned that this site is now being closely monitored and anything you post here (or anywhere else on the Internet for that matter) can and will be used against you by TURDS to ban you from all further participation in Social Media. So there!

Repent and be miserable, all ye White Supremacist Cis-Gendered filth! We’re watching you!!!