First!
That’s right, first.
Welcome, one and all to the……
first,
the prime,
the initial,
the primordial,
the instigational,
the premier,
the maiden,
the earliest,
the original,
the pioneer,
the primary,
the beginning,
the inaugural,
Carnival of Comedy.
Don’t all those synonyms for ‘first’ line up look a lot like the numeral one? Well, who cares what you think? I think they do and I am your host, spacemonkey.
This carnival of comedy is going to be more fun than a barrel full of… submissions. You thought I was going to say more fun than a barrel full of monkeys, didn’t you? Admit it, you did. Well, hah! I’m proud to say I resisted the urge.
What? I said it anyway? Well, crap. I told myself and TOLD myself I wasn’t going to bring up monkeys. Frank J. hates them (monkeys) so. Then what do I do? I bring up monkeys. Great.
Man.
But I can’t let my failures as host stop me. I must move on, there’s a Carnival of Comedy to start.
Speaking of submissions (remember? I was talking about the submissions a while back, before I got on the monkey bent) we do have a barrelful. Not a literal barrel, of course. As that would just be silly. I suppose I could print them out, I guess and they might fill a notebook. But saying a notebook-full of submissions isn’t as nearly as funny as a barrel full of, not monkeys, but submissions. Is it? I don’t think so.
A notebook-full of monkeys might actually be funnier than both of the other sayings, but it would be inaccurate seeing as I have Carnival of Comedy submissions and not, in fact, monkeys. I always strive for accuracy. That was why I admitted to not actually having a barrel.
We do have a record number of submissions for a Carnival of Comedy on IMAO if memory serves and it being the first one and all. You’ll have to count them though, the number gets so high I have to take my shoes off to count them and I’m not allowed to do that at work any more. For a few reasons that I won’t go into here.
That said, the number of submissions is, like, WAAAAY more than 10 as you can see for yourself. Unless, of couse, you are a total moron, then I suppose you’ll just have to take my word for it. Even I can tell its more than 10. I wouldn’t need to take my shoes off otherwise.
Of course, I don’t think there are any total morons who read this site regularly. But it is a special day after all and there might be some who were brought in by bus for the occasion.
As hoped, the submissions range all over the comedy spectrum from funny pictures to essays to lists to howtos, there’s even an ebay auction.
Enough lead in I suppose so lets all take our shoes off (if we are allowed), kick back, put the drinks away and on the count of one, start the carnival.
All Ready? All together.

Continue reading ‘The First! Carnival of Comedy’ »