Here is a comment from Mars in response to my Know Thy Enemy: Syria piece (this is a cut and past with no edits):
Have you got nothing better to do then talk about Syria?
A place no doubt you know F_____ all about.
If wasn’t for Syria your brain will stop working.
France have a great thing to offer mainly some common sense and just being human like every body else.
These macho craps about kicking ass how munch of English and American stupidity does carry, can’t you any fuller of bull shit.
Like if England and America is perfect.
More this idiot Bush who classed Sharon as a man of peace, that really goes to show the level of intelligent he carry.
He was proven stupid until 9/11; it was his lucky day it made him looks intelligent.
If all of you hate the ME so much why don’t you go back and stay where you belong.
NEW FUN FACTS ABOUT SYRIA
* Syrians has a not good grasp of the English.
* In addition to sponsoring terrorism, they like to whine when you say mean things about them.
* They apparently believe that mental functioning derives from Syria.
* They admire Osama bin Laden, Saddam Hussein, and France.
And one last thing: I don’t think England and America are perfect… just America.
Hmm. I don’t know about being stupid prior to 9/11 (loved that tax cut) but he sure has wised up since then. You don’t appease terrorists (including Arafat). You send Buck the marine.
SEE! There it is…. When you cross a goat with a hash smoking Arab, you get a rant about how great France and it’s little sister Syria are.
Some people just don’t understand satire. My sister is a far left liberal, and she loves this site! Laugh every once in a while, some things in life are meant not to be taken seriously!
I am surprised he did not call you a jooooooooo.
Could you run that one through BabelFish? It couldn’t get any screwier.
Well, for some odd reason, France is brought up every time any nation is getting bashed, which leads me to the conclusion that they have finally constructed their “feared” SWMIRG (Super Weenie Mind Influencing Ray Gun). France has been attempting to construct this evil ray gun for decades now, and although it would take an normal industrious people about a week, they were usually; “too tired to de zee werk, I weel finish zees stof az zoon az I nap.”
Alas, the evil machine was machined, and now France is able to vomit their weenie ideals upon the rest of the EU, that is except England, which still manages to house quite a few beer-drinking”good ole chaps.” (europe’s version of good ole boys)
*On a side note: Wine, while tasty and good for the heart in small amounts, has been recently proven that if ingested to freequently will de-descend testicles to the point that they will create a vagina-like chasm where they once resided.
Ok, enough about the terror, I have a solution that will kill two birds with one stone. Have a “random” raffle where all the hippies in America would “win” a free plane ticket to France. They won’t ask any questions because thay’ll all just think that they signed up one day when they were high. (You could just spin it off as a Ben & Jerry’s promotion if you wanted too)
You might be saying to yourself: “Now John, I understand sending the hippies away and all, but why would this be worth my tax dollars to send hippies on a free trip?”
“Pardon me, kind sir, I will gladly elaborate:”
1) Unbeknownst to the hippies (they’re high anyway), these tickets will be one-way tickets.
2) Hippies are: dirty, smelly, whiny, and altogether “groovy” dudes.
3) French are: dirty, smelly, whiny, and altogether “groovy” dudes.
4) The hippies won’t want to come home anymore than we want them too.
5) We’ll tell France that were sending over our ambassadors from Texas, Louisana, South Carolina, Tennessee, Mississipi, Arkansas, etc.
6) France will be all like: “Oh hoh hoh, if zees is what zee South eez like, Amereeca must not be zo bad.”
7) France will keep the hippies, and start thinking that Bush is just getting a bad rap from all those poor innocent terrorist-harboring countries, thus turning the Weenie Gun to our favor.
8) No hippies, Amen. (And with any luck, the patchouli ban will finally be passed in lieu.)
9) Europe will love us, and the German will sing praise to Bush. “Breken-ze-doich” (You have to say it out loud, because I don’t know how to spell in German at all, although I’m about %95 certain that the phraise means “praise Bush”)
“Now John, what if the hippies talk about how they really feel about everything?”
Come on guys, they’re hippies with NO S.W.I.M.R.G, so they’ll have no influence on anyone at all, even the French, who by some modern scientific connundrum still contain shards of human DNA.
Oh yeah, if the hippies ever try to come home, don’t tell them “no” directly. Just keep bumping their flights saying: “whoa, what are the odds? What a bummer man.” Eventually they’ll get bored and just “wander off.”
Some people just don’t understand satire
The reason that the SWMIRG does not work against England is cloud cover (unlike Scotland and Ireland who are too drunk to be affected by the ray gun).
The heavy cloud cover over London prevent the rays from actually reaching Brittain. Also hte Brits already hate all French products, culture, and just about anything else coming out of spitFrancespit so on the few ocasions were it reaches GB they just ignore it. “oh look chaps, a Frog ray” “Bollocks, get out of the way, it probably stinks”
Question: In a fight between France and Aquaman, who would win?
So let me get this strait…
This guy wants us to bomb france too?
Well, ok.
Hell, I am wondering how to tell the hippies from the Frogs. Hmmmmmm.
Both smell
Both smoke, although the French smoke stinky cigs and the hippies are all bong-heads.
Sandals
Hippie chicks, although hirsute, have less underarm hair than the average Frogette.
Hippies tend to dress in seafarer jeans, serapes and mass quantities of hemp.
Frogs were skinny legged shiny pants and black turtlenecks.
Hmmmmmm, this is going to require more research.
I’ve never though about that before!