Observations Regarding Election 2006

The key to defeating any Senate Democrat in the future — an endorsement by Kos.
Minnesota elected its first Muslim Senator. The Capitol Security team will now have to allow him to wear explosive vests — provided it’s for “religious purposes.”
Arizona approved English as its official language. You can learn all the details by calling their official English Is The Official Arizona Language Hotline. Press 1 for English.
Gay Marriage Bans were approved in several states. So no matter what happened last night with all the gay celebrations, you can be sure that very few of them woke up married.
Jim Webb appears to be the winner in the Virginia senate race. He was so happy that he took his campaign manager, swept him up in his arms, held him upside down, and put his penis in his mouth. This is a tribal ritual signifying love and respect. (Okay, I stole that joke from Ace — but it’s still a good one.)
Democrats do indeed have a solid plan for Iraq: This includes banning guns, more Sunni/Shiite affirmative action, and making the rich Iraqis pay their fair share.
In California, Proposition 87 (the Alternative Fuel By Taxing Big Oil Initiative) went down in flames. Which is good. Burning ballots can be used as an alternative fuel.
The Mark Foley flirting with pages issue had a big impact. Most Americans are against child predators. Unless they can moonwalk.
Overall, I’d have to say we got our comeuppance. Sure, we ate it big time, but look on the bright side: Now Democrats have to do the driving instead of screaming at us from the back seat and constantly whapping us with the map. Get your whapping arms ready, the next two years are going to be an interesting ride.

11 Comments

  1. For the record, Frank, Ellison (the Minnesota Muslim) was elected as a Congressman, not as a Senator.
    Meanwhile, I guess I get to hear six years of penis jokes about my new Senator Webb. Oh goodie.
    I believe this election has confirmed my working theory over several years: the American public, as a whole, is stupid.

  2. I can come up with 2 good things about this election:
    1. Republicans are going to be more energized in 2008, and hopefully the GOP won’t screw over their base.
    2.Maybe now the College Republicans at my school can now enjoy the Protected Minority perks. (Whenever the CDs wanted to justify silencing the CRs, they claimed that since we held the majority in Congress we didn’t get to have a say)

  3. Hey, RightWingF***
    What was the Republicans plan for dealing with Iraq? I guess the country didn’t buy the it’ll all work out bullshit coming out of gabs of f***s like you and FORMER defense secretary Rumsfled.
    Ha Ha…..FORMER.

  4. RightWingDuck,
    Narb isn’t going to have much of a chance. One of the “benefits” for LLL’s like him is that now Charley Rangel will get his military draft. This time around both men and women will be eligible, there won’t be any exemptions or amnesties for draft dodgers.
    Enjoy, Narb!

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