It’s been years since I last saw some on the In My Worlds™. I’m cracking up reading these old jokes I forgot.
“That reminds me of another thing I learned,” Bush said. “The capital of Thailand.”
“The capital of Thailand?” Daschle said with confusion.
“Yeah: Punchyouintheballs!” Bush exclaimed, and then punched Daschle in the groin.
I miss Daschle. He was a good foil.
I, like most narcissistic people, have become convinced I have super mental powers. I’m pretty sure now I can do special things with my brain (other than think and head butt, that is).
Let’s try an experiment.
Think of a word; any word. Keep thinking of it over and over. And then click “Read More”.
Are you thinking of the word? If you’re reading this, then you’re not thinking of the word. Think of the word really really hard and then click ahead.
…it’s illegal to throw a rock at a Democat’s head? It’s true; I looked it up. We truly are a fascist state with no freedom left.
Now I have to come up with other plans for Wednesday if the Democrats win…
“When fascism comes to America, we will no longer be able to throw rocks at Democrats’ heads.” – Frank J.
It’s Friday, so you know it’s time for the wire services to post the non sequitur non-news story of Mahmoud Abbas praying at a mosque.
However, this week’s different… this week we’re going to start a new feature called:
Every so often, readers come to me and ask the questions that haunt their little right-wing minds. These are questions that deserve love, understanding, gentleness and patience. Usually I take these questions and chuck them in the garbage.
But if I keep doing that, people will stop submitting their questions and then we wouldn’t be able to look at their problems and secretly giggle.
That’s why I’ve taken the time to answer the questions that are on YOUR mind.
Why? Because I care.
And SarahK told me to.
But mostly because I care.
Ask Dr. Duck – The Answers.
If I were to take over the world, what country would you like me to give you?
Posted by: brandEn
Taking over the world, BrandEN? That’s very BoldEN. Which country? Let me think. Every great accomplishment deserves some sort of cheap tacky souvenir. Give me Mexico. That’s good. Plus it’s nearby where I can see it and think of our IMAO readers.
**
Oh Wise Avian Sage of Knowing Stuff, etc.,
Do you normally appear in public fully clothed, or have you adopted the Donald Duck trouser-less look, and if so, could you please stay far away from my children?
Welcome back, Mr. McFakerson.
Posted by: PaleoMedic
Much like Donald Duck and Bill Clinton, I prefer to go without pants.
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Dear Dr. Duck
What was that fake SpaceMonkey thing I saw yesterday? Will I have to see it again?
Posted by: AlaskaNick
AlaskaNick, we wish you would be more sensitive. That’s why it’s good that you read IMAO. Remember to compliment Lair, it took him a long time to come up with that crap.
Glenn Reynolds yesterday linked to a left-wing blog because of the author’s displeasure with Harold Ford Jr. (I didn’t read the post; I assume he didn’t like him because he’s black). From a scan of the posts at the blog, it’s just the average postings of a BDS sufferer, but a quote at the top of the blog caught my eye:
“When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross.” – Sinclair Lewis
I don’t know who Sinclair Lewis is, but I was thinking that maybe I could write something really quotable about fascism coming to America and then other blogs would feature what I say. So, I decided to come up with a super-quotable quote about fascism. I figured I’d either have to spend a long time thinking about the nature of fascism or just start writing whatever comes to mind.
I, of course, chose the latter:
“When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in a poncho and carrying a bong.” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, Michael Moore will smother it in mayo and eat it.” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, the netroots crowd will question the timing.” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, liberals will embrace it for the sake of multiculturalism.” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in a gordita and carry three kinds of cheeses.” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, the wiener kids at Kos will ally with it in hopes to defeat the dreaded Chimpy McHitler.” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, it will have a cape, a cane, and a pimp hat with a feather in it and everyone will be like, ‘That’s some stylish fascism!'” – Frank J.
“When fascism comes to America, I’ll punch it in its dumb monkey face.” – Frank J.
Continue reading ‘“When fascism comes to America, it will make a great blog post.” – Frank J.’ »
1) (T/F) Moe invented the drink, “The Flaming Moe”
2) When Burns sells his power plant, he sells it to businessmen from what country?
3) In “Treehouse of Horror II”, Bart turns Homer into what?
4) What is the name of Rev. Lovejoy’s and Rabbi Krustofski’s radio show?
Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.
Since it’s Friday, I thought I’d spread the joy of humor-free, apolitical Friday Catblogging to IMAO (aka “I-MEOW”).
Let’s face it… there’s a reason why I’ mthe only IMAO blogger who does this Friday Catblogging thing. It’s because I have lost teh funny. And, sadly, there is no hope of me ever getting it back.
Anyway, it’s time for Piper the Confused:
You can find more examples of Friday catblogging by searching a blog search engine such as Technorati for “catblogging.”
You can also find a roundup of catblogging posts at The Friday Ark, located at The Modulator blog.
Then, when the weekend is nearly over, head over to The Carnival of the Cats for more kitty goodness.
There’s also Flickr Groups called Furry Friday and Friday Catblogging.
Anybody I miss?
