Petition Against Limbaugh

Limbaugh said he hopes Barack Obama will fail, so the Democrats have made a petition against Rush. See, they suspect Obama probably will fail, and then if that happens people will be like, “This is exactly what Rush hoped would happen! He has the power to shape reality!” And then the Democrats will be like, “What if the next thing he hopes is for man-sized badgers to bite our heads off?” But then they’ll hear a loud scratching at the door and cries of, “Kree! Kree!” (which is the sound I imagine man-sized badgers would make). Then the door will come crashing down and the Democrats will be like, “Aieeeee!”

So that’s why they have an online petition.

56 Comments

  1. It appears to be a non-binding, unalateral petition…useful. And why aren’t they tackling actual PROBLEMS? Perhaps because CONgress is the opposite of PROgress.

    Good thing they aren’t actually working. Maybe their being bogged down with useless gestures and posturing will keep them from f***ing the country as quickly as they’d originally planned.

    Keep ’em blathering, Rush!

  2. It’d be cool if they actually sent a hard copy of their petition to Rush. He could auction it off and give the money to charity like he did the last time deomcrats signed something saying they didn’t like him.

  3. How do we know that Rush ISN’T a man-sized badger about to bite their heads off? Politically-speaking, of course.

    I’m rooting for the badgers. Are wolverines and badgers related?

    I also like that scene in Mars Attacks where Grandma laughs as says, “They blew up Congress.”

  4. I’m going to start a petitition that will mandate more effective petitions.

    We, the undersigned, to solemnly sign our names, thereby ratifying the following:

    A) That petitions should be meaningful, at least to the person who is reading it.

    2) That petitions should be binding. If we sign away gravity, that means NO GRAVITY. Ever. Even if we spell it wrong. You know we didn’t mean to write “gravy.” That would be silly.

    B) That should a petition ever include the signature of a famous person and be sold at an auction, that all signers should get a cut of the profits after expenses.

    E) That counter-petitions don’t count, and should be clearly marked at the top “COUNTER-PETITION: IS MEANINGLESS”

    and

    3) No written petitions against people whose voices are on the radio. Audible petitions only.

  5. When Michael Moore-puddin or Keith Uberdouche makes a statement 100 times worse than anything Rush has said in his entire career, Republicans…

    A) Kept America safe from terrorism, freed 50 million people from despots, pushed back against Democrats destroying the banking system, and expanded the economy for 6 years despite the collapse of the Clinton internet bubble, 9/11, and the collapse of the real estate bubble.

    B) Signed a worthless petition against freedom of speech, while spending more than all our seven years of “expensive wars” combined in less than 6 months – twice over (by their numbers) or 3 times over (by accurate ones), all to cover for the fact that they screwed up the banking and energy systems in the first place.

  6. Are wolverines and badgers related?

    Yes. They are both members of the Mustelidae or weasel family. The wolverine is the largest of the land dwelling critters. The giant otter is the largest overall.

  7. “Yes. They are both members of the Mustelidae or weasel family. The wolverine is the largest of the land dwelling critters. The giant otter is the largest overall.”

    I disagree, ma boy! The biggest weasel in the land would have to either be George Soros or Bill Clinton. I am hard pressed to decide which is the biggest…

  8. I’m John McKKKain and I just have this to say to my conservative friends across the aisle: SHUT.UP!! It’s every person’s responsibility to support our new President in these trying thymes. Rush Limbaugh is an example of a pundit whose expectations are impossible to live up to! God knows I can’t. Mr. Limbaugh is advocating pure REPUBLIC-an principles based on our Constitution. When was the last time you saw anyone from that ilk reaching across the aisle to get things done!! Ah hah! You haven’t. So, don’t listen to Rush, my friends. He won’t get you anywhere except back to the rigid, inflexible interpretation of our founding fathers. And we all know they weren’t very kind to our British friends across that big ocean aisle!

  9. I actually have worn a giant badger costume in the past! (I’m from Wisconsin. It was the mascot for my robotics team in high school.)

    Oromin, I am having a very difficult time restraining myself. My internal snark generator saw “robotics team mascot” and went into overload. I am only staying quiet about this admission of yours, because:

    A. I don’t recognize you as a frequent commentor and I’d hate to discourage anybody.
    B. I don’t want to be a hypocrite as I was on my high school’s Math Team. We were called the “Relatively Prime” and did quite well. But none of you are allowed to speak of this. As far as any of you know, in high school I was extremely athletic, popular and successful with the ladies. Yeah, that’s the ticket…

  10. The fact that they own everything in Washington and are still frothing at the mouth over Rush is the biggest complement he could get: it means he’s effective. Same for Dubya, Cheney, and Palin.

    But yeah, as long as the Dumocrats are b*tching about us, they’re not doing anything too heinous to the country and we can just otherwise ignore them. God bless Rush for taking their crap for our team.

  11. Oromin – I just can’t get that picture out of my head. The the only person dorkier than a member of the high school robotics is the badger-suited team mascot.

    You are the alpha-dork! All inferior dorks bow down in homage!

  12. innominatus – you have much better self control than I do. I too would not want to discourge Oromin. I think it is great that he comes right out and says it.

    God help me though – I can’t stop smiling at the thought.

    Oromin – if it helps any I will tell on myself. I was on a PeeWee football team that did not score a single point all year – we were shut out every single game.

  13. What I want to do is something similar to what Howard Stern did for that one season of American Idol, where he had all his listeners call in and keep this really awful contestant in the game as long as possible, thus completely delegitimizing the whole show. I say that every single one of Rush’s listeners, and everyone that reads this comment (all 2 of you), to sign it. We hyperinflate it to the point where the Dems have no idea what their real level of support is, and the only thing they can do is have another online petition in order to try and get it right, but then we go and screw with that one, too!

  14. “I think Kree! Kree! should be the official call of IMAO! Hillarious!”

    It’s how we’ll know each other after the revolution, when we’re all in hiding. “The Rocking Chair Is Against The Wall.” “John Has a Brown Mustache.” “Kree! Kree!” “Frank…is that you?””

  15. # Roanoke RnR says:
    January 28th, 2009 at 4:25 pm

    It’s Rush’s fault that Obama thought a window was the door into the Oval office…http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2009/01/28/2009-01-28_hey_bam_thats_not_the_door.html

    Midvale School For The Gifted…

  16. The Wisconsin University mascot is a Badger… Yea…I know it’s like way gay… But not as gay as the Minnesota Golden Gopher…sigh… That’s why when either team plays my Iowa Hawkeyes, Herky Hawkeye gives both mascots a nuclear wedgie and makes them go sit with the high school girls…

  17. “As far as any of you know, in high school I was extremely athletic, popular and successful with the ladies. Yeah, that’s the ticket…”

    I never, ever had a crush on a jock or tried to date one. Skinny guys who played music, who were quiet (so I could bring out the wild side outside the stupid school settings), and definitely never, ever stupid, or had quirky private interests – that was always the thing. ‘Course I liked long hair and denim jackets, too, but hey – I bet you fit at least a bunch of those 🙂

  18. Herky Hawkeye? WTF? Herky????

    ‘Herky’ reminds me of hurricane which reminds me of tornado which reminds me of CYCLONE! But hey, at least they have the good fashion sense to model their uniforms after those worn by the soon-to-be-Super-Bowl-Champs-Again Pittsburgh Steelers! Woooo!

  19. I think Rush will be able to pull through the petition crisis pretty much unscathed, but he’s screwed if they bring out the dreaded *U.N. Resolution*.
    …if they get that, it’s game over, dude.

  20. I wrote:
    “Freedom of Speach is a beutiful thing!
    Keep on Speaking Truth to Power!
    (Hey Dems! I though debate and disent
    were the New Patriotism? Or is just
    paying more taxes Patriotic in your world now?)”

    Yeah! That’ll show’em! heh.
    (claim your victories where you can find them.)

  21. Hey! Badgers and wolverines are NOT related! Wolverines are so much cooler and more awesome than those lame badgers. Even when the Wolverines completely suck and lose to everyone else, they can still beat the Badgers (and the Gophers, but nobody cares about them). But just you wait, Rich Rod will get things turned around soon (or he’ll be out on his can), and then the Wolverines will reclaim their rightful place as the “Champions of the (mid)west”.

    WOLVERINES!!!

  22. Pingback: Democrats petition against Limbaugh in Fairness Doctrine preview « Wellsy’s World

  23. this is in keeping with BHO’s way of doing things. Dont take any real action. Its the “Animal House” solution.
    “I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody’s part. “

  24. Oromin – “I actually have worn a giant badger costume in the past! (I’m from Wisconsin. It was the mascot for my robotics team in high school.)”

    Too much info… too much info. Unless, of course, the badger costume was an aphrodisiac to your female classmates.

    IMO petitions are like those stupid chain emails. Do you really believe signing a petition will make Rush change his mind or shut down his show? Yes??? Well then, I guess angry badgers will attack you and your family if you don’t immediately forward that email to 10 friends.

  25. Keep it up libs. They will continue to give Mr. Limbaugh free publicity, as they have Ms. Coulter, which is of course the last thing they should want. Please do expose more people to conservative thought, pretty please. Thats how we get you. Expose you to common sense and logic and eventually even Joe six-pack starts to pay attention.

    Especially when it cuts into his liquor allotment or his TV time. Right media elitists.

  26. “Thank you for sharing this message with friends and family. When members of the Republican Attack Machine like Rush Limbaugh kick into action, we need a strong grassroots response.”

    HOW DID THEY FIND OUT ABOUT THE MACHINE!!! WE HAVE A LEAK!!! A TRAITOR IN OUR MIDST!!!

  27. Thats just wonderful. There is nothing more pointless, worthless, and borderline masturbatory than an internet petition. The true mark of a worthless person is pushing an internet petition to silence oposing view points.

  28. I’m not positive, but I believe the Dems are misrepresenting what Rush actually said. (Now there’s a big surprise).

    The web site blurb is:

    Last week, Rush Limbaugh actually said that he “hopes” President Obama fails to meet America’s challenges.

    If Hopey is turning to Socialism as the way to meet America’s challenges, then I hope he fails too. America needs more freedom and Capitalism, not less.

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  30. There is only one way to stop Liberals in their tracks. Turn off the money. We could stage a taxpayer revolt or find out who corporations support and then refuse to buy from them. Since I personally don’t want to go to jail I think the second idea is better.

    GE is a perfect example. They have been on the O’vomit train for quite some time, wonder why? Could it be that since they have quite the stake in Wind Power they need someone in the White House that is not only friendly to their “ecological sensitivity” but someone who can be bought?

    If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck and smells like a duck……… sure as shooting isn’t a mountain lion.

  31. #51 – Seanmahair,
    I like that.
    Perfectly legal and economical too; since Not spending our money would be the whole point!
    Full disclosure of compaign contributions would be necessary to see where to place the blame, of course.
    Too bad we can’t hire the same death-squad of lawyers who are demanding the names, addresses, and places of business of people who supported prop. 8 in California to find out who the O king is most indebted to.
    Maybe rival companies would rat on each other in an attempt to direct the boycott; another savings, since they would bear the burden of investigation and leaking the news.
    In the long run, any company (or foreign government) wanting to interfere in our politics would have to give equal amounts to each party or candidate to avoid the appearance of favoritism which might tend to disgruntlize their consumer base.

  32. While we’re going that route I’m all for real campaign finance reform. Each party can spend exactly 1 million dollars on campaign advertisements within 6 months of the election. Also for every minute of positive “news” time one candidate gets his opponent gets the same. Since there’s nothing on TV worth watching this shouldn’t be a problem. Each should have to make an application to run, complete with campaign promises neatly spelled out, no legal mumbo jumbo or legalize. Something that has to be notarized and can be accessed by the “common man”. Back room deal making should be outlawed with the fine being the inability to ever run for anything including a bus, for life.

    Also every time a candidate casts unfounded and untruthful aspersions they should be fined 500 dollars. Ann Coulter writes whole books that use peoples actual word to prove her point. If we can’t field candidates at least as intelligent as Ann maybe she should be running the government. This provision alone would empty war chests all over the country.

    Once upon a time the call to serve one’s country as a representative was a sacrifice. Maybe it needs to be returned to that state again. If these characters weren’t making so much money and spent the majority of their time working in actual jobs maybe, just maybe their perspective would have some patina of reality.

    But then again I am a cynic and pessimist so……..probably not.

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  34. If this is still a free country, why do we want to get Rush Limbaugh off the air??? He has the biggest radio audience of anyone in radio. This goes against my freedom to listen to Rush.
    He is entitled to share his opinion on radio just as Keith Oberman has the right to spew his rants. I will fight to keep the freedoms we still enjoy. One of them is to be able to listen to whomever
    I choose to listen to. We may disagree with each other but should have the right to voice our opinions.

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