Obama recently tied up LA traffic, angering the usually liberal LA against him. That got me thinking, with Obama taking the unpopular stance on about everything combined with his arrogant attitude, there’s little left he can do to turn even more people against him. But if that’s his goal, here’s some ideas:
WAYS OBAMA CAN STILL TURN EVEN MORE PEOPLE AGAINST HIM
* Change the national anthem to people blowing into a vuvuzela.
* Go on vacation so much that most your speeches are given from Disney World.
* Make it so everyone gets an automated call twice or may daily explaining how they can be more sensitive to illegal immigrants.
* Build a mosque in the White House.
* Protect needed government forms by putting them each individually in clamshell packaging.
* New rhetorical device: Angrily shake a puppy to get everyone’s attention.
* Have the federal government install a switch to kill the internet. Idly flip it back and forth whenever you’re bored.
* Keep scheduling prime time addresses to constantly interrupt Conan O’Brien’s new show.
* Say it’s ridiculous that your health care plan would have “death panels” as you unveil your completely different “who we make dead to save money” panel.
* Announce new jobs plan: “Shut up, I obviously don’t care.”
* Get a Blagojevich hairstyle.
* Keep dropping hints about how things would go more smoothly if you were made dictator.
Now that Brett Favre is back as my team’s QB, schedule a news conference and make coverage mandatory the night we open up against the Saints! That would be so painful I’d stick a vuvuzela up my own butt figuring that If it’s going to hurt that much I’m going to do it to myself!
“* Make it so everyone gets an automated call twice or may daily explaining how they can be more sensitive to illegal immigrants.”
Start it off with “Press one for English…”
He could also dupe that idiot senator with the floppy ears into proposing that Obama be granted unlimited emergency powers.
That iron picket fence surrounding the White House would be perfect for displaying the hands and heads of his political enemies.
How about “Let Biden handle press briefings and make then Mandatory Viewing to all Americans.”
“Encourage” Californian’s to press to Long Gun Registration and limits on ammunition purchases…
I have been looking for an excuse to finally buy a M1 Garand and M1903 Springfield form CMP.
🙂
Take trips out to flyover country and hunt people with a bb gun.
Land Air force one on the freeway at 5pm and roller blade around for a while.
Pass a speed limit of 40 mph for nascar “to save gas” Take airforce one to a see a race.
Go to the movies, Set up front and wear a big hat.
Announce you are going to attend a popular Washington area church, get the secret service to do high level security on everyone, but sleep in instead.
Mount the teleprompter on a Segway and ride it everywhere.
Close Hawaii for a “private party”
Insist that Hollywood give you advance private screenings of all new movies, drop spoilers into prime time addresses.
Do the same for TV shows but time the speech to interrupt the show you are spoiling.
Without explanation begin wearing a coat of human skin.
Interrupt the Superbowl to make an emergency announcement about how you think Soccer should be the “Real” football
Rename a populous state after your wife.
Change the recipe of cool ranch Doritos.
He could come out in support of Muslims while simultaneously insulting Christians…oh, wait…never mind.
@Joe Schmo: Sadly, the telephone message would start out as:
Presione uno para el español.
Prensa dos para el inglés .
I’m still chuckling.
Give Michelle an hour of prime time to tell American children that they are too fat. Set behind her eating an ice cream cone.
* Run for re-election
Broadcast the Adhan 5 times a day, out of massive speakers on the rooftop of the Whitehouse.
Take up Cat Juggling
Announce the new economic data, UNEXPECTEDLY.
Announce that he’s having so much fun Livin’Large at the taxpayer expense that he would really like a second term in office.
More bowing, and apologizing to foreign leaders.
More primetime lectures on why Americans are a bunch of Stoopid RAAAAACISTS!
I tend to think that O-bah-muhh has already found the Cheney/Halliburton Internet Kill Switch. It was disguised to look like an extra button on the TV remote.
@Burmashave: That would be effective, too.
* Put seven more stars on the flag.
* Award a contract for Navy helicopters to the Russians over American companies(too late)
* Build a Home Depot at the Alamo.
* Stack the SCOTUS by adding four more justices, all communist.
* Fold the US Constitution into a pirate hat(arrr ar rrrr pirrrrraaaats!)
* Build a Benihana at the USS Arizona Memorial.
* Cut off the head from the statue of Jebediah Springfield.
* Take Bo to Michael Vick’s house.
* Invite the Bush’s over for a beer summit. Bow to him.
* Change everything ‘MLK’ to ‘BHO’.
* Hoc a loogie in the Communion Cup.
“Keep dropping hints about how things would go more smoothly if you were made dictator.”
Isn’t he already doint this?
Make it mandatory to learn Arabic.
Mandate every woman to wear a Burka.
Out law anything made out of pork.
Outlaw all bars and strip joints.
Outlaw Victoria’s Secret.
Use Pelosi’s image as the standard of beauty all women must strive for.
@16 Cilla.
Use Pelosi’s image as the standard of beauty all women must strive for.
Bad! No! No!
Blame George W. even more.
Drive around Washington, D.C. in “the beast” with the window down, yelling through a bullhorn: “NO!, you can’t have the keys, but if you’re nice, I’ll stop and let you check the tire pressure!”
– Get re-elected
I have to disagree re: the Blagojevich haircut. In fact, I think it would be hilarious (with a capital ‘arious’) if Obama got that haircut. He’d still be a douchebag, but then he’d have the hair to match.
* Have Air Force One make continuous, unannounced, low fly-overs of big American cities, causing widespread panic.
* Actually arrange for private pilots to violate the air space where he’s visiting, causing the Air National Guard to scramble F-15’s supersonically over large metropolitan areas. Happened a few days ago around Seattle – I kid you not. People here hadn’t heard sonic booms in so long they didn’t know what they were. Everywhere he goes, he should leave being known as “Boom Boom Obama.”
* Always have your presidential motorcade drive unannounced through American cities on the freeways, causing local state patrols to shut them down for reasons that aren’t obvious to anyone. (Also happens here with Obama each time he vists but didn’t with Bush!)
* That’s enough – he’ll continue to find ways to anger us that we can’t even imagine now.
Tax the crap out of people and then tell them they should thank you for it.
Sign into law Michelle’s wish that all chairs in the USA be widened to fit her ginormas ass, since walking out of posh parties and State Dinners with a wing back clamped around her buttocks hasn’t caught on as a fashion statement any better than her clothing choices.
He could sign a presidential order demanding that all future vampire movies must follow “twilight” rules like sparkling in the sun instead of burning up into a pile of ash like God intended. I would have more but I have avoided the franchise like the plague.
Instead on “in God we trust” on our currency he could change it to “In Allah we trust”
Print the sign identifying the site of the former Twin Towers in Arabic.
Put Elena Kagan’s face on the $1 bill so that we have to look at it every day.
Make Ramadan a public school holiday (oh, wait, that’s been done).
I’d vote the entire thread FTW, but that would be ever so liberal. Russ #19 gets it for combining hilarious imagery, the tire pressure crapola and the automobile in the ditch meme all into one. Did I miss anything, Russ?
Honestly pretty much exactly what he has been doing so far.
Imagine if he didn’t have the press running a slobbery cover for him with all the amateurish and outright contradictory things he has done and said?
Speaking of pissing people off, I know the universe is awesome because Joe Biden is the living cartoon embodiment of everything the left has relentlessly tried to paint Dan Quayle, Sarah Palin, and Bob Dole etc.. over the years.
He could always drown some kittens or run over a puppy or two. Maybe he could make some kids cry or put some religious leaders in jail. I’m sure however someone on his staff has already thought of these things and has thrown them out as not being evil enough. After all with the bunch of Chicago politicians in the White House I’m sure they can continue to come up with more and move inappropriate things for him to do and say.
After all that city is the poster child for the Liberal meme “vote early, vote often, vote dead. What did people really expect?
Live to be 100.
Make Helen Thomas his press secretary.
He could make Gibbs work topless except for a bow tie. It would be like Chris Farley in his famous Patrick Swayze SNL.
Make Bacon a controlled substance.
Compete on dancing with the stars with Michelle. rig the voting.
Sunbathe on the White house lawn
Take the limo for a joyride, wreck it and blame Biden
Invade Canada.
When referring back to the previous administration, refer to Bush as whitey.
Sell Alaska back to the Russians.
Take fannie mae’s backlog of foreclosed houses and give them to Hamas.
Move the gitmo detainees to the food court at the mall.
Wander around the white house in your underwear. Refuse to get dressed even when working in the Oval office. when pressed for an explanation simply say “MY house, my rules.”
Some of the best ones I can think of, he has already done:
Nationalize General Motors
Refer to Jerusalem by it’s Arabic name.
grovel before foreign leaders
Skip Christmas
Celebrate Ramadan
Throw parties on the white house lawn
close freeways during rush hour
take lavish vacations during times of high unemployment.
insult supreme court justices during the state of the union
and on and on.
In response to Burmashave @#26, I missed an opportunity. I should have written “On his next vacation, instead of taking Air Force One, drive “the beast” and………………..”
In place of those curly paisley patterns on our dollar bills, why not add some ornate Arabic calligraphy?
Force through legislation requiring all Ice Cream Trucks to play the muslim call to prayer instead of “Pop goes the weasel”.
I seem to have a mental illness as my brain is stuck on this topic.
Spray paint Obama tag art on various Washington area monuments.
Begin talking in nothing but rhyming sing-song.
Sign a Jobs bill, then give all the jobs to evil scary monkeys.
Plan a new mission to the moon using only politically correct astronauts spend an extra billion or two making the lunar module wheel chair accessible.
Sell ad space on the side of the white house.
Force PBS to carry presidential Karaoke night.
Put a new sign under the Statue of Liberty. Welcome everyone except most unholy infidels.
Blame Bush for poorly received resignation speech.
That would be impossible DanielS. He could spend the whole speech flipping the bird and calling America racist and his resignation would still be well received
I don’t think you want to be blowing on any vevuzula…they sound dangerous…like tonettes.
Health concerns
A study by Dr Ruth McNerney of the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, and colleagues, concluded that the spread of diseases by means of vuvuzelas was possible.[40] McNerney found tiny droplets at the bottom of a vuvuzela that can carry flu and cold germs that are small enough to stay suspended in the air for hours, and can enter into the airways of a person’s lungs. The vuvuzelas can infect others on a greater scale than coughing or shouting.
The vuvuzelas have the potential to cause noise-induced hearing loss.[3][4][6][40] Prof James Hall III, Dr Dirk Koekemoer, De Wet Swanepoel and colleagues at the University of Pretoria found that vuvuzelas can have a negative effect when a listener’s eardrums are exposed to the instrument’s high-intensity sound. The vuvuzelas produce an average sound pressure of 113 dB(A) at 2 metres (6.6 ft) from the device opening.[4] The study finds that subjects should not be exposed to more than 15 minutes per day at an intensity of 100 dB(A).[4] The study assumes that if a single vuvuzela emits a sound that is dangerously loud to subjects within a 2 metre radius, and numerous vuvuzelas are typically blown together for the duration of a match, it may put spectators at a significant risk of hearing loss.[4] Hearing loss experts at the U.S. National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health (NIOSH) recommend that exposure at the 113 dB(A) level not exceed 45 seconds per day.[41] A newer model has a modified mouthpiece that reduces the volume by 20 dB.[42]
[edit] Noise levels and bans
Concerns about the constant intensities produced by the vuvuzelas during the 2010 FIFA World Cup matches were raised independently by representatives of international football teams, spectators and sports commentators. The noise levels that were demonstrated during the 2010 FIFA World Cup prompted various sporting organisations to ban the vuvuzela at future events