This Is Not Blindness, It’s a Deliberate Choice to Not See

[High Praise! to Irritable Pundit]

The REAL Number Is 912

Police have cited a 42-year-old Pennsylvania woman for disorderly conduct after she called 911 requesting a divorce.

What a waste of everyone’s time. Might as well call Eric Holder & ask for a Fast & Furious investigation.

Belated Happy Industrial Revolution Day!

[High Praise! to Idahoser]

Forget Earth Day:

Celebrate the Industrial Revolution

Let us have a day when all of us take a moment to acknowledge the enormous contribution made to human life by the inventors and businessmen of the Industrial Revolution.

CAUTION (Carpenter only): The author of the piece is not just a scum of the earth Libertarian, he’s one of those Objectivist minions of Satan.

Link of the Day: Satire – President Obama Signs Executive Order Outlawing The Taliban

[High Praise! to The Duffel Blog]

President Obama Signs Executive Order Outlawing The Taliban

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

Wisdom of the Day: Constitution Cooking Locos

Do It for the Children!

In New York state, some parents are complaining that the new standardized tests are “too hard” for their children.

Just waiting for some Democrat to propose free answer keys for the underprivileged.

Obama Warned Us – Prosperity

The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product, but on the reach of our prosperity, on the ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart — not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

BARACK OBAMA, Inaugural Address, Jan. 20. 2009

“And rest assured that route will be thoroughly paved with only the very best of good intentions.”

The Secret to Invisibility: Bad Typing

According to Lindsey Graham, a misspelling of Tamerlan Tsarnaev’s name kept the FBI from knowing he left the country. Is this something we really want to advertise? All I have to do is put two m’s in Fleming and suddenly I’m invisible to the federal government.

While they may have their eyes on Frank, they’ll never find Frnak!

Straight Line of the Day: Because of the Sequester Cutbacks, Airports…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Because of the sequester cutbacks, airports…

From 90% to 49%

So a new USA Today poll showed that only 49% favor Congress passing a new gun control law. So, as James Taranto pointed out, if we take Obama’s claims at face value (and who would doubt his integrity?), then we’ve had a 41 point drop in support for background checks in five days.

Wow, they really just face planted on this issue. At the beginning, a few of us were worried we’d be back to that annoying “assault weapons” ban and having to buy idiotic, half-solid plastic ten round magazines for our handguns. Then it was apparent that wouldn’t happen and they focused on pointlessly expanding background checks and we were all like, “Well, that might be minorly annoying.” And then they couldn’t even get that because everyone except for a few ninnies are wise to how useless this gun control nonsense is.

Who is a background check going to stop? Only a really dumb criminal would attempt to go through legal means to get a gun if he knew he’d fail the background check. And even if one is caught, what then?

“What? You won’t give me a gun? I guess I’ll give up trying to murder people and instead hug everyone.”

All except the laziest of criminals is going to try again until they find a way to get one of the hundreds of millions of guns floating around this country. It’s pointless to stop a criminal from getting a gun once; you have to stop him every time. And you can’t.

Trying to keep criminals from getting guns is pointless. And if you do that by disarming law abiding citizens, it’s also evil. If you want to prevent gun violence, work on the assumption the criminals already have guns. Pass laws aimed only at criminals like tougher sentences for any crime involving a gun. And make sure citizens can be armed so that being a violent criminal is a very dangerous thing.

And get rid of the idiotic “Gun Free School Zone” signs that basically say nothing but “here is a great place for a mass shooting.” These are the only logical options available. If your emotions keep you from seeing the logic, you need to excuse yourself from this issue because you’re unable to think straight on it.

Random Thoughts: Earth Day, Canada, and Immigration

Completely missed it was Earth Day yesterday. I never got all this jingoism over the planet we just happened to be born on.

Obviously the Boston marathon bombers were on the right because they believed the common right-wing assumption that Muslims are terrorists.

Why would you attempt a terror attack in Canada? That’s lack of ambition right there

I wish they made a globe that only had the U.S. on it.

I hope the thwarted terror attack will cause the news to finally explain Canada to us. I never got what they do up there.

So jobs and the economy… are we done with that until the next president?

A conspiracy I noticed: The actions of conspiracy theorists are inconsistent with people who truly believe the government is murdering its own citizens.

If I have a say, please don’t murder babies, even if that’s more convenient for me. #BroChoice

I don’t believe any guy so beta as to actually use the term “Bro-Choice” could successfully impregnate a woman.

I’m just one of the majority of Americans confused about why having immigration laws and enforcing them is so controversial.

I still wondering exactly how killing random people at a marathon was supposed to help Islam, but I’m guessing no satisfying answer exists.

How Does This Secure the Border?

The 844-page immigration reform bill contains a program to give out taxpayer-funded free cell phones.

I’ll ask the obvious question… wouldn’t it be cheaper to make the border wall out of bricks?