Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The most surprising item in the new Benghazi Report…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The most surprising item in the new Benghazi Report…
… is that if you take just the first letter of every paragraph, it spells out “Paul is dead.”
…was that it tested positive for Ricin.
… is that
EducationalFederal Decree #29 bans anyone from reading it.…was the name of Thor’s enemy in the next movie.
… thanks to new efficiency measures, is that it only costs taxpayers $43,184.32 per copy to print.
…is that Carpenter was involved in the final edit and snuck in YGDFT!YLTATSOTE in every third sentence.
… is that it proves the whole thing was a conspiracy. Further discussion of the subject banned at imao.us
The part that reads: “I AM NOT A CRACKPOT!”
…people not commenting on Hillary’s part of the report made her cry.
… is the centerfold spread of Susan Rice.
…is that it DID matter!
@9: What difference does it make?
…was the conclusion….Yes! It really does matter!”
… is that the original terrorist demand were to have included cookies by Anonymiss.
…was an inert substance called polystran, a newly developed chemical used to strengthen insulation and has an estimated breakdown time of three thousand years and — oh, wait: That’s most surprising item in the filling for new Twinkies.
…were John Kerry’s comments that make it clear he was still confusing Benghazi with Ben-Gay.
…were the plans to prevent Benghazi from yielding yet another IMAO straight line… Fail.
… is the complete and fully-sourced timeline of all of the events that occurred on the day of the attacks and the days immediately followi… wow… almost made it through that with a straight face.
stains from Bo’s housebreaking.
It was on white paper, in black ink – RACIST!
…is the conclusion that Democrats will ignore the murder of Americans if it doesn’t help them get a gun control bill passed.
… was that the terrorists apparently all used 7-round clips [sic] in their assault weapons.
…was Joe Biden’s proposal to fire a shotgun through the door at the attackers…which showed more initiative than the rest of the Exec branch on that day.
…was the discovery that the embassy’s instructions, in case of attack, came from the ‘Book of Armaments’ on how to deploy the ‘Holy Grenade of Antioch’
… was a back-door amnesty proposal snuck in by Senators McCain, Graham, and Rubio.
Paper is watermarked, “What difference, at this point, does it make?”
. . . is the embedded video of Hillary Clinton and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad in a break-dancing competition.
… was that the head of the consulate’s security team was Paul Blart, Mall Cop.
… is that it was actually edited by a guy named “Ben Ghazi”.
…is that no one in the administration denied that Bengazi is in fact in Libya.
… is the accidental disclosure of the secret recipe for KFC.
… is the transcript of a frank and coherent interview with Vice President Biden, causing immediate dismissal of the entire report as a fake.
… is the inclusion of a “Where’s Waldo?” game in each photograph reproduced.
…was that the entire attack was choreographed to Gangnam Style, to which we have no tactical response
…was that the statements claiming it was a response to a video were based on reporting from CNN
…was the page 6 recipe for lemon drop cookies
…were the repeated references to “president Romney” that were crossed out
…was the sign-off review list on the last page listed Hillary Clinton, Ahmadinejad, Kim Jung Un, and a Sith lord
…was the postmark of January 12, but was lost by the USPS for 3 months. On purpose. Requested by a high ranking government official. To allow time to redact the involvement of US “employees” in the attack. So Obama can blame republicans for the attack. I AM NOT A CRACKPOT!
…was the way Israel is referred to as “that country where accountants and jewelers come from”
…will never be known, as it was stolen by scum of the earth Libertarians.
…the security assessment started with ‘Never will you find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.’
… is the surprise inclusion of three chapters of the next Game of Thrones novel. (“We had a minimum page count,” replied one well-placed source who spoke on the condition of anonymity.)
… is the full translation of the report contents, including all classified materials, in Arabic.
… is that Michael Bey has been chosen to direct the screen adaptation.
… is that, contrary to all known physical laws and common sense, offering the terrorists copious amounts of bacon to back down did not work.
… is an Amanda Palmer “poem” showing empathy for the terrorists.
…is the complete lack of sentence structure.
…while the House GOP had concluded that Hillary blew the Benghazi response, former President Bill Clinton remarked that it was the first thing he was aware of that Hillary had ever blown.
…was the relevation that Kint’s story to the detective was invented on the fly, and yet he was really Keyzer Soze.
… is that the whole thing is written in iambic pentameter.
It’s a cookbook.
… is that “Rosebud” is, apparently, a sled.
… is that if you read it aloud backwards, it will summon Cthulhu from its ancient slumber to destroy all of mankind.
… was that it defined is and proved billy did have sex with that woman.
@47: Also known as the Hillary! 2016 campaign.
… is that it also shows who let the dogs out, what becomes of the brokenhearted, and that somebody really does know what time it is.
…were the repeated over-strikes by some entity know only as “The Grammar Hammer”
…were all the cookie crumbs in between the pages.
… was the crayon scrawl of “nuh-uh” in Biden’s handwriting on the most damning bits of evidence.
…it turns out it was incited by a Justin Bieber video.
…was found in Sandy Berger’s underwear.
… is [REDACTED] and [REDACTED]; which was hastily redacted for [REDACTED] concerns.
Hilary fhtagn!
that Hilary “unexpectedly” lied.
was that Obama and Hillary WERE to blame.
…is that the entire report is the line “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” repeated over and over and over….
…is that the picture on the cover was of the Charmin Bears.
…was when you find out that Snape is actually a good guy.
…. was the nice, new cover sheet on the TPS report. TPS = Totally Political Sh!t
…Hillary’s career was dead the whole time.
…was Appendix C – that charted Hillary’s Cankles.
…is Obama’s birth certificate from Greenland
… is that Ben Ghazi is a real person in Chicago. He is homeless and it really is Bush’s fault
…is Al Gore’s patent on the internet.
… is that the administration and the news media are consistently on the same page.
… is the way Hillary’s reputation was undefended, by design. Her reputation was shot and dragged through the mud. That sounds awful! Can you imagine it happening to a person?
Sneaky Bacon to Bunkerhillbilly @6
http://www.imao.us/index.php/2013/04/i-may-be-having-too-much-fun-with-this/
…is that the Benghazi Consulate and Fort Marcy Park have the same GPS coordinates.
…is the Ambassadors complete disregard of posted OSHA sign banning being raped and murdered by terrorists.
…is the admission of the truth we all know and dare not speak, Hillary’s screeching voice is reason enough to hate and kill us. The worst, most heartless and vicious of the terrorists let her live to punish us with the fate worse than death, having to occasionally listen to Hillary.
is that it was typed on an IBM Selectric typewriter and has been authenticated by Dan Rather.
….is the revelation that they were going to send in Seal Team Six but settled on ordering pizza and beer to better watch the videos instead.
The most surprising item in the new Benghazi Report…
…was the cover letter saying, “File next to Rosewood Law Firm Papers”
…was the arabic translation consisting only of “Allahu Akbar!”
…was finding out who shot JR.
…no one suspected Colonel Mustard in the library with the candlestick!
…no one expected some kind of Spanish Inquisition…
…The Colonel’s Secret Recipe!
The most surprising item in the new Benghazi Report…
…was the speech by Neil Kinnock.
Was that it made carpenter run far away!!!!!!
YGDFT!YLTATSOTE What ever that means.
The most surprising item in the new Benghazi Report…
…look! Squirrel!
…the current price of tea in China.
…that these clowns could issue a report at all.
… was that the Doubletalk was in Doubletalk interpreted that it was all BUSH’s fault.
The most surprising item in the new Benghazi Report…
… is something that you just can’t unsee.
… was its cameo appearance in the new “Evil Dead” movie.
… was a list of passwords to the AP Twitter accounts.
… was a “Nuke the Moon” recommendation.
… was that the State Department now defines “protecting ambassadors” as “making sure they’ve got sufficient condoms”.
… was that Mel Brooks was credited as an author.
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No one is getting a multi-million dollar grant for this amazing new instance of Green Technology.
whhoosp. wrong therad 😉