Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
cup holders.
You no longer need to say ‘Hold mah beer and watch this.’ before your EVA
is a nuclear weapon that the wearer can detonate on the moon.
is a comfy chair.
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
are such diverse elements as…
The long requested “fart fan”
A spiffy space vest and space bowtie,
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
rear entry hatch for their Gay outreach program.
I’m not saying its for alien probes…. but its for alien probes…. too….
…the liberal version is meant to be empty.
A skosh more room for space junk.
The LBJ inseam module suit?
Since LBJ nicknamed his junk ‘Jumbo’ that may be fitting.
Internal face shield wipers
…it comes in black to be more slendering.
A book that says “DON’T PANIC” on the front.
Automatic piped in Star Trek opening muzak
When you point it has a “Pew Pew Pew” sound effect.
…a built-in remote control pod bay door opener.
…the material is resistant to Alien acid blood.
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
two pair of pants.
…more pockets to hold small items that can be later sold as “genuine space-traveled stuff”…
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
tapable rear keg holder.
NASA has developed a new space suit. Amongst its features…
a subwoofer.
Silkscreening that says “I’m with Stupid”
…it comes in regular and relaxed-fit.
Silkscreening that says “Neil Armstrong went to the moon, but all I got was this Space suit.”
cigar cutter is built in.
(Can’t smoke because you’re in a pure oxygen atmosphere, but you can chomp all you want.)
…glittery socks for the moonwalk.
…prayer rug compartment for outreach crew on Mars mission.
Unfortunately only one glove to go with the socks.
Easily detachable components for the construction of signs on the moon.
…one-hour dry cleaning.
…Elton John’s Rocket Man on a continuous audio loop.
Shatner’s version?
Left shirt pocket is labeled “Left Stuff” and right shirt pocket is labeled “Right Stuff”
…a complimentary audio version of Frank J’s first draft of the sequel to Superego!
…for the hippster astronaut, button fly!
…a deployable emergency straw to suck away the dreaded zero-G “Oh-my-God-I-can’t-see-or breathe” moisture glob…
…Space Force weapons system, Vehicle Empowerment Looping Corraller Retainment Oligarchy (VELCRO) in case of trouble with tribbles.
Built in porta potty for no gravity – Oh Gee Whiz
Enough room for another person for that space mile-high club.
Built-in fleshlight … I mean, flashlight.