We have another batch of questions from our offer to let you Ask IMAO Anything.
Some questions that were left in the comments previously were answered by others on the IMAO Crack Answers Squad (we still need a good name for that), but some were left unanswered. We’re answering those now. And, we’re adding clarification to a few that were already answered.
Oppo: Can I ask questions about Hardee’s parking lots?
You just did.
Harvey: Who Mourns for Adonais?
‘Tis we, who lost in stormy visions, keep
With phantoms an unprofitable strife,
And in mad trance, strike with our spirit’s knife
Invulnerable nothings. We decay
Like corpses in a charnel; fear and grief
Convulse us and consume us day by day,
And cold hopes swarm like worms within our living clay.
zzyzx: Canada is fictional!?! I’ve always known Belgium is fictional but I had no idea about Canada!! So who’s that Trudeau guy … another one of Mayor Pete’s husbands?
Correction: one of his wives.
Oppo: Will all presidential candidates be asked “Briefs or Boxers?”?
Only the women running: Kamala Harris, Elizabeth Warren, Kirsten Gillibrand, Tulsi Gabbard, Amy Klobuchar, Marianne Williamson, and Pete Buttigieg.
c64wood: Is Soylent Green really green?
Yes. And so are the people’s faces after finding out what was in it.
Oppo: When’s the next “caulk like a pirate” day?
You think you’re putty cute, don’t you?
DamnCat: How much did the lady pay for the stairway to heaven?
One soul. But she wasn’t using it. Kinda like Kamala Harris.
Oppo: Did they give you a key to IMAO world headquarters, or did they give you a key from the lost and found?
Did they give you a key to IMAO world headquarters, or just a handful of quarters to call someone to let you in?
Did they give you a key to IMAO world headquarters, or do you just lurk around until someone else gets buzzed in?
Did they give you a key to IMAO world headquarters, or do you have to go all “Nakatomi Tower” to get to your terminal?
Frank loaned me his. He hasn’t asked for them back yet.
ayleygraph2015: Who should buy groceries: Sid or Stephen?
As long as I get to eat the groceries, it doesn’t matter.
Oppo: I say, stout yeoman, may I borrow your pennyfarthing?
Forsooth, it is hardly worthy of consideration as a mode of transportation, but doest as thou will.
Oppo: Has anti-Catholicism reached critical mass?
I don’t have Confirmation of that.
walruskkkch: Now my question for today.
Well, who are you?
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Come on tell me who are you
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Oh, I really wanna know
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Tell me tell me who are you
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Come on come on
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Ah who the f**k are you?
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Who are you?
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Oh tell me who are you
(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Who? Me?
Slapout: I haven’t gotten a newsletter from Frank J in a while. Did he stop or is it going to my spam folder?
Both.
Veeshir: Why haven’t you answered any of my questions?
What do you mean? I’ve even answered questions you didn’t ask.
If you have a question for us, you can email Ask.IMAO.Anything@gmail.com or leave an answer in the comments. If you leave the question here, perhaps one of our smartasses loyal following will be able to provide you with what you seek.
We’ll follow up with additional answers, and answers to the email questions, in a few days.
Would you rather live in the ascendancy of a civilization or it’s decline?
Just how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood???
How much wind could a windbreaker break if a windbreaker could break wind?
As much as Chuck would.
Chuck Norris does not break wind, he utterly annihilates it.
When Chuck Norris says, “Pull my finger” you break wind.
In Soviet Russia, wind break you.
How do you type with boxing gloves on your hands?
Why must I be a teenager in Love?
Because your parents were going to move to Indifference a few years ago, but they just lost interest.
When cataloging a biography do you prefer CT or the Subject number? And why.
Who moderates the moderators?
What’d you change your IMAO password to?
Who wrote the Book of Love?
Last session.
In the immortal words of AOC, “Who dis?”
–canadafreepress.com/article/who-dis-who-datwho-cares
What’s so funny about peace, love, and understanding?
They have their shoes on the wrong feet.
I’ve heard there’s an untrue story that’s getting passed around. Is this an urban legend?
Sub urban legend.
— Chevy Chase
Quo Vadis?
Quo Tardis.
How can I get into a poker game with Obama, who said things like “Don’t call my bluff!”?
Does anyone now in the government have an unsecured email server in their residence transmitting classified information without intent for it to be accessed and therefore without fear of repercussion?
We could tell but then we would have to witness your unexpected suicide by consults notes drowning inside a locked refrigerator in your pool.
In the immortal words of Sergeant Foley in An Officer and a Gentleman:
“Let’s get down to it. Why would a slick little hustler like you sign up for this kind of abuse?”
“the IMAO Crack Answers Squad”
.
“AskIMAO” Pies? Nah, way too gay.
Well, not as gay as “the gayest thing” that Buttigieg asked us to imagine — but in the running.
“Quint the AskIMAO”?
Meh.
But you see where I’m going with this.
I asked once a long time ago if beta carotene had passed its evaluation yet. Hmm?
In the event of a prolonged crisis, isn’t the Supply Room / IT Department really the best place to be?
Are “Jurassic Drive” and “Jurassic: Reverse” being considered as sequel titles?
What in the hell are the fantods?
I’m gassy from all the onions and not a bit sleepy. Can’t we just cuddle?
We know about the name “Evian”, but is there a better backwards word to use as the name of a brand of water?
Patez
Why do we have to wait for Answers #6 to get a comments link up?