Straight Line of the Day: Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
Unusual Tweet by Strategic Command Spurs Comedic Comments
Stars and Stripes | March 28, 2021 | Seth RobsomDid a military mascot gain control of the U.S. Strategic Command Twitter account or has someone inadvertently released the launch code for a nuclear weapon?
These were among the questions asked by commenters after the command, at 8:48 a.m. Monday, tweeted the sequence
“;l;;gmlxzssaw.”
The unusual message had received more than 12,000 likes, 9,000 retweets and hundreds of comments less than an hour after it was posted.
“Apologizes for any confusion. Please disregard this post,” the command, at Offutt Air Force Base, Neb., tweeted in vain after the original message.
When in Danger or in doubt
Run in circles, scream and shout.
…prepare three envelopes
…”Surrender Dorothy”
…”We begin bombing in 5 minutes.”
Ladies and Gentlemen take my advice,
pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
…”Drink more Ovaltine.”
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
Olympus has fallen.
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
“Who let the dogs out?” Biden, that’s who!
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
the diversity officer is hard at work.
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
Unleash the Kraken!
Welease Bawabbas
Welease Wudolph the Wed-nosed Weindeer!
Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down! Which coincidentally eliminates O’Biden from being a Weeble…
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
Free Ever Grounded!
…”The eagle flies on Friday”
J-J-J-J-Jim Eagle???
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
the end of the world as we know it…
but I feel fine.
…”Hail, hail Freedonia”
The message? Whatever it is, I’m against it.
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
Biden decided to take up Tweeting.
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
It’s take your toddler to work day.
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
something in Chinese, we’ll circle back on that.
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
well I’m not saying it’s Aliens but… it’s Aliens.
…IMAO; get moderately lame x-rated zenomorphs – send soon as Wednesday… it’s clear to me…
The IMAO security section wants to have a word with you… in private.
Intergalactic Strippers: Come see the XXXenomorphs bare all!
Zaphod Beeblebrox is on-board.
“;l;;gmlxzssaw.”
Obviously trying out Biden’s new Secret Service nickname.
Wapner in 10 minutes…. definitely
New code for “Duck & Cover”, just came in over the CRM114
Dr. Strangelove Obscury?
Yes indeed a very rare Obscury is in order.
Excellent! I’ve been to a rodeo . . .
“;l;;gmlxzssaw.” (Make sure to tell Domino’s no anchovies)
…”All of Taiwan airspace belong to us…”
Dave’s not here, man.
Out: Name, rank and serial number.
In: Pronouns.
Sorry, Joe, we only take orders from Matthew Broderick now.
Come over here and…make that Utah, and say that.
…”You G** D****ed F***ing Thieves! You Libertarians Truly Are The Scum of The Earth!”
Well, it is the only rational response to “trunalimunumaprzure.”
So, the Sea of Serenity it is. I was really expecting the target to be the Sea of Tranquility.
;l;;gmlxzssaw
..but first, a little covfefe!
…I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
;l
;
;
(groucho
marx
likenesses)
“x . . .
z.”
“Something’s
skipped.”
“Atsa-
why”
;l
;
;
gimme
more
limericks:
x
Zippers are down or they’re up;
So suck it up, Buttercup!
She’ll pledge it’ll stay
Always this way —
Which is why you should get a pre-nup.
…”May as well get bombed tonight, because we’re all getting bombed tomorrow…”
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
BESURETODRINKYOUROVALTINE
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
you really should have kept that secret decoder ring you got in that one box of Cracker Jacks all those years ago.
Good little Joey ate all his meat? Now he can have his pudding.
BOHICA Alert. (Dems are back in power)
The Killing of Georgie (Part III), Let’s nuke Minneapolis
Strategic Command has sent you a message! It means…
They want you back in the USAF/SAC because the Commanders Facility Inspection (CFI) is coming up and they need you to mop and wax thirty year old floors so they’ll look like they’ve never been walked on.
PS: Anyone who ever spent any time in SAC knows exactly what I’m talking about.
Yes, what ever happened to the familiar “Strategic Air Command”? The headline sounded wrong to me, just calling it “Strategic Command.” Wonder when and why it was changed. “Air” is not diverse enough?
Not if white people can breathe it.