Last night I was out of beer. So I did the next best thing to numb my brain – I watched American Idol.
At this point in the game, I don’t have too many favorites, but a few of them stand out enough for me to mention.
Phil Stacey: I know SarahK and some of the other ladies don’t like this guy much. Why? Because he went off to the Idol auditions while his wife was busy giving birth to their child. Personally, I don’t have a problem with this. At the risk of sounding old-fashioined, I believe that birthing babies is “women’s work.” I know, I know: A good husband should be there for the birth, and the afterbirth. But given a choice between following my dreams and watching 10 pounds of (Self censored because Ducky is shivering from the memories of the placenta coming out). I would choose American Idol.
Besides, American Idol has everything a delivery room has – The encouraging words, the screaming, the use of heavy drugs. And that’s just Paula Abdul.
Phil was a great singer. He started off weird. But then again, so did a lot of the guys. Most American Idol men struggle with the lower registers as many of them are more comfortable singing in the higher registers. What’s that called – castrato? I forget.
Phil really brought the song home once he got going. Plus, that bald head reminds me of that Alien guy from the Flintsones. What was his name? Kazoo?
Nick Pedro: Another guy I really liked was Nick Pedro. I love this guy’s story. I mean he quit last year for good reasons. I mean, what man wants to get on stage and sing Buttercup. Please. But it tortured him to wonder what his life could have been like. I identifiy with Nick. It’s hard to wonder about what could have been. A long time ago, Frank J. offered me the chance to write at IMAO. I always wondered what would have happened had I said yes.
Nick has a great voice. His song sucked and it was boring. Actually, I take it all back. He sucked.
Screw you Nick Pedro for making me type this for no reason.
Paul Kim. SarahK noticed the same thing i did. You sing Careless Whisper and you’re doing those stupid “yo, check this” gang-hip hop gestures? Why not just pull out a gun. That would be cool.

Paul Kim Singing:
I’m never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
(Smoothly pulls out gun and shoots at audience)
Bang – Bitch!
though it’s easy to pretend
I know you’re not a fool

Tonight the girls sing. I like to hear a lot of the lady singers. Ironically, many of them have deeper voices than the men. This should should be interesting.