Straight Line of the Day: St. Patrick’s Day Resolutions Posted by Oppo on 17 March 2026, 12:00 pm “I thought those were for New Year’s.” “Forget it. He’s on a roll.”
for example: A catheter goes you-know where. Beware of St. Patrick’s Cathe-Drill! 3 Reply to this comment
Never fight without drinkin’. And the other way around, too. May the pavement rise up to hit ya’. 6 Reply to this comment
I resolve to take better care of my replacement shillelagh so it doesn’t up and disappear like it’s predecessor. 2 Reply to this comment
I resolved to share the true story of St. Patrick: About 1500 years ago, there was a young man who was kidnapped, taken to a foreign land, and made a slave. He looked at the people in his new land and thought, “Wow, these people really need Jesus.” 5 Reply to this comment
My solemn St. Patrick’s Day resolution this year is to drink Guinness, same as every year. 3 Reply to this comment
Reminisce about the 1970s and bomb, kneecap and shoot my friends and foes alike. Back before the Troubles were imported from the Mid East. 1 Reply to this comment
I will never drink leftover green beer for next New Year’s Eve again….ever.
Be kind to snakes…
Beware of “St. Patrick’s Bad Analogies”
for example:
A catheter goes you-know where. Beware of St. Patrick’s Cathe-Drill!
Never fight without drinkin’. And the other way around, too. May the pavement rise up to hit ya’.
St. Patrick’s Day Resolutions
A nation once again.
I prefer the solutions to the resolutions. Solutions like whiskey and beer.
Never hold my beer in my shootin’ hand.
None needed. My resolution was to survive the Ides of March.
Find more secure storage for me lucky charms.
Mika:
“When would you like for my Private Chauffeur to pick you up?”
I resolve to take better care of my replacement shillelagh so it doesn’t up and disappear like it’s predecessor.
I resolved to share the true story of St. Patrick:
About 1500 years ago, there was a young man who was kidnapped, taken to a foreign land, and made a slave.
He looked at the people in his new land and thought, “Wow, these people really need Jesus.”
My solemn St. Patrick’s Day resolution this year is to drink Guinness, same as every year.
I resolve to never play the Wild Rover.
No
Never no more
Reminisce about the 1970s and bomb, kneecap and shoot my friends and foes alike. Back before the Troubles were imported from the Mid East.