There seems to be a new trend: kids beating up ferocious animals. Before, I told you about a kid who beat up a bear, and now here’s one who punched and alligator. See, Megan, alligators are just like bullies; it you stand up to them, they’ll always back down.
“The best thing to do during an alligator attack is struggle, make noise and create confusion, much like a democrat, said Joy Hill, a spokeswoman for the Florida Fish & Wildlife Conservation Commission.”
Nice pic of the boy and his stuffed gator accompanies the story.
Burma Shave.
What I would like to know is who would NOT struggle, make noise and creat confusion??
The French, maybe?
“The boy’s mother, Misty Warren, said the family has seen alligators in the area before, but none had ever bothered them.”
Rule number one:
DON’T SWIM WITH ALLIGATORS! Duh.
Frank:
Enough stalling. Get busy on IMW for tomorrow, or so help me God, I will shake my fust at you.
What can prove Darwinism more than a family that lets its offspring swim in the gator pond?
I hope this little tale of courage convinces more kids to take on large predators.
I know it belongs with the wonderful letter to Michael Moore, but I just saw this today.
http://www.michaelmoorehatesamerica.com/
check it out
Just like the alligator that they’re chasing in Central Florida. Such a friendly guy, he just wanted to lick the kid’s face and chew on his ear a little… just ignore the ugly lacerations, that’s it…
Does anyone know who still sells copies of Larson’s “There’s a hair in my dirt?”
But Frank, Alligators are scary. Cant blame it for wanting to eat that kid though, especially since any Floridean knows this is breeding season for them. The Kid is lucky eating him is all the alligator wanted to do!
Conservative_D, that is a fantastic site. I was just thinking the other day that some patriotic filmmaker should do a movie that exposes Moore’s bullshit.
I’ve linked the site on my blog (and the Starship Troopers site that Joe mentioned earlier as well), but traffic-wise that amounts to putting a handwritten cardboard sign up on a forgotten dirt road. I think I might send Rachel Lucas an e-mail about this; if she links Michael Moore Hates America (and if Frank does too) those guys might get the traffic and support they need to hand that bloated liar his ass on a platter.
Sorry for the visual.
S
I’ll give it a look see.
we went to the beach for a field trip in biology and my friend punched a crab
it looked at her funny and tried to eat a fish
[Rockynoggin thinks to self] I wonder if the ronin will ever get another encoded message
Fighting back is only going to make the bears and alligators angier, and then more animals will become sympathetic to their cause.
For every bear you punch, there will be ten more to take their place.
Violence begets violence.
We need to get along with these creatures and celebrate our cultural differences.
It’s America’s fault for having children animals find so tasty.
No, the tasty children are a result of a diet of fat forced on Americans by the fast food corporate machine. Years of McDonald’s trash dumped in our rivers, swamps and forests have driven the animals to crave for a Big Mac, and when they can’t find one, then Lil’ Mac will do just fine. CURSE YOU RONALD MCDONALD!
All children should carry guns from this point on. Children residing near alligator ponds should carry grenades. Children residing near heavy forestry should carry lots of C-4.
Pfft. A 4 to 6 ft. gator is a juvenile, still learning what is/is not good eatin’. That kid is lucky he ran into the student and not the master.
I can’t wait to see “Teenager vs. Alligator” on “Animal Face-Off” on the Discovery Channel.
I once kicked a weiner dog in the balls.