EXCLUSIVE!
Thanks to anonymous sources, we here at IMAO (and America is an Obamanation!) have managed to get hold of a secret communique from Secretary of Education Arne Duncan to members of the teachers’ union regarding the President’s live address to our nation’s school children this coming Tuesday:
Greetings, my fellow educators and indoctrination coordinators!
As I am certain you are well aware by now, a truly exciting day in the annals of history approaches, as our beloved President will address school children all over this quite plain and undistinguished nation on Tuesday, September 8th, to ask their help in moving this backward, bitter land of bible-clinging troglodytes forward into the glorious international collective of tomorrow.
I hope you are all as excited as I am by this new and hopeful day of change we can all believe in!
By now, you should have received your classroom kits and instructions on how to make this a true moment of insight and enlightenment for all of the good little progressives who have been entrusted to your care. Remember, our Dear Leader is counting on the cooperation of each and every one of you to help undo any damage that may have been inflicted on our poor, dear children by their awful, evil-mongering parental units during this excruciatingly long and painful summer. Thankfully, though, we have them back under our control now and with your hard work and commitment to our just and noble cause, I am quite certain that their young heads full of mush can still be molded into what our Great Society most needs — conformist worker drones.
Be certain to engage the students in the Party approved activities before, during and after The Great One’s sure-to-be awe-inspiring speech. It is imperative that we not miss this opportunity to drive home The Messiah’s message to these impressionable young children, so they can begin helping us push our agenda on the American People while we still can.
Unfortunately, some students may not be as cooperative as we might hope. Luckily, there are proven methods of dealing with their misbehavior…
[Bart Simpson Chalkboard Generator]
Should that prove ineffective, there is no cause for alarm as we are including several bottles of our newest formula in your classroom kits!
Yours in Faithful “O”bedience,
Arne Duncan
United States Secretary of Education
BREAKING:
The Nose on Your Face has an exclusive copy of the original draft of the Dept. of Education’s classroom activities sheet.
To Quote Pink Floyd : We don’t need no education…We don’t need no thought control…No dark sarcasm in the classroom…Teachers leave them kids alone…Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone!…All in all it’s just another brick in the wall…All in all you’re just another brick in the wall.
“When an opponent declares, ‘I will not come over to your side.’, I calmly say,’Your child belongs to us already…Who are you?…You will pass on.Your descendents,however,now stand in the new camp.In a short time they will know nothing else except this new COMMUNITY.”—Former community organizer, Adolf Hitler
*Cough, cough!* *Sniff, snorkle!* I think I hear my grandchildren getting the eyes-wide-open flu. The peak of symptoms should hit on, probably, Tuesday, then they should be all better by, oh, Wednesday or maybe Thursday of next week, just to avoid any fall-out from the indoctrination fog.
OBAMA LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE!!!
The classless disgrace is reaching a pinacle. What a tool.
And rangle, what a pos. The prejudice against present hussein is blocking reform.
Nothing said about about the classless disgrace being a commie mo fo.
Just as water seeks its own level so to does moronism. Obama is simply leveling to his capacity – and school children are the highest he can attain. Community organizing is not full of people on the right of the bell curve after all…
Just another bucket on the head. Wouldn’t it be funny if 3 red X’s flashed across Obamas’ telecast?
My kids are safely homeschooled. No worries here. Why, if this talk with the kids is so important, are they not encouraging private/homeschools to participate? Do they, perhaps, know something about the public schools and their willingness to be propagandized versus private/homeschools, hmmmmmmmmmm?
Sept. 8th: National Keep Your Kids Home From School Day.
It’s too late, my kid already graduated college. He’s a raging conservative and I doubt that Obama, peace be unto him, could do to him what 4 years of commie professors couldn’t do!
R.S. McCain asks: What would Ferris Bueller do?
Kids should just go on strike and skip school that day. And when Obama send out his community army to make them go, they will all succumb to irony poisoning because they’re union workers.
Has anyone else noticed that Bart is a very good speller and has been for years?
I have. And it makes me suspect he may not a real person.
Sweet my son”s school sent home the opt out letter. I think it should have been an opt in policy. Ian ain’t hearing the Big O.
Instead of “Parents – Keep your kids home” day, why not really screw with the system and make it “Students – Bring your parents to school” day?
I couldn’t go to my childs school. It wouldn’t be pretty. All and all it sounds like a great “mental health day” for the son. His sister can use his help with her daycare kids and I won’t have to re-educate him at home.
I call that a win-win.
HEY OBAMA, LEAVE MY KID ALONE. All and all your just another commie jerk in the Mall (National, that is).
Sorry for the double shot but I want to ask those who have no problem with this, imagine if you can a member of the opposing party attempting this kind of end run and propaganda. I dare say that if Pres. Bush had even suggested such a thing he’d have been tarred, feathered, run out of town on a rail and hoisted with his own petard.
My how the WORMS have turned.
16. I’m agin it mostly because it will a precedent. There will be another, then another, then guess what, another. As many as schools will put up with over the next three years.
Perhaps there will be an urgent need for Napolitano from Homeland Security to tell the kiddies about her terrorist list and why Canada should worry us as much as Mexico.
After that you can bet your butt that Nancy will feel slighted and get time to explain how the CIA lied to her and Bush drowned bunny rabbits. Or maybe it was Cheney who drowned them. Or Karl. Hell, it was all of them!
But even Reid probably won’t have the gall to tell children why casinos should get stimulus funds.
BTW. Our school board didn’t allow the broadcast in elementary or junior high. They will show it to high school students enrolled in a civics course.
Cool. I gots me a Bart Chalkboard Generator. Your minimum usefulness in life has been met Mr. Right, live longish and be not poor.
My child could use a little “deprogramming”, he read this site once and is now convinced that Obama is a clone of Hitler
Oh heck!
Is anyone watching what he has in his other hand?
My Spidey-(paranoia)-sense suspects we’re being mis-directed again!
Constant Vigilance!
Funny, my kid read robotimecops site and thought he turned into a floating turd~
which is doubly funny since I have no kids and actually AM a floating turd (according to ex)…
Great post Ted!