How to Not Be Extreme

So the reason we get crazy people like the Discovery Channel hostage taker is people have extreme views and stuff, and they probably shouldn’t have those. I don’t know where people get extreme views from; maybe it’s from kids on the playground. Anyway, parents should be very careful your kids don’t have extreme views, and if their views get extreme, you should give them a spanking.

Perhaps some people don’t know their views are extreme. That’s silly. It’s very easy to tell if you’re views are extreme. If every time you tell people your views, everyone is like, “That’s crazy!” That means your views are extreme.

But what if people just aren’t enlightened enough on the subject?

That’s not the case. Your views are extreme. Get better views.

I’m pretty sure I’m right and everyone else is just an unthinking sheeple!

No. You are wrong. You have extreme, crazy views and you should stop that.

RON PAUL!

I said stop that! Stop that now!

Wait, who am I talking to?

Anyway, test out your views and if people say they’re crazy, they probably are. But test them out with lots of different people. Like if you’ve only told your views to professors and students on a college campus and they all think you’re super correct, that’s actually a sign your views are both extreme and hugely moronic.

So go out there, and don’t be extreme!

28 Comments

  1. A realistic plan for peace: Nuke The Moon. – – -“You’re Crazy!” – – – “Extremism in pursuit of a realistic plan for peace is no vice, and moderation in pursuit of Science! is no virtue.”

  2. “For I say unto you, that except your righteousness exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven.”
    “That’s just CRAZY!” “He’s an EXTREMIST!” “Crucify him!”

  3. One of my favorites is, “Get you nose outta my wallet!” See, that’s not extreme since I’m giving fair warning. The alternative is to just cut their nose off despite their face which is ugly anyway.

    But maybe I should change it to “Get your cotton-pickin’ hands off my wallet!” which would apply to the President since Rick Sanchez at CNN called him the “Cotton-picking President” which must not be extreme and is okay to say.

  4. “If every time you tell people your views, everyone is like, “That’s crazy!” That means your views are extreme.”

    Or, if you live in San Francisco or Berkley and they DON’T tell you you’re crazy, that means your views are extreme.

  5. “Like if you’ve only told your views to professors and students on a college campus and they all think you’re super correct, or if your views match those of the MSM, that’s actually a sign your views are both extreme and hugely moronic.”

    FIFY

    Heck, Rick Sanchez says the terrorist “[is] he’s very concerned. He’s an activist, may be very well-meaning, but he’s now put himself in a situation…”

    So, this guy is crazy as a loon, but to the MSM, he’s concerned and well-meaning. Agree with that, and you’re a loon, too.

  6. Frank J., I rarely disagree with you, e.g. I’m totally on board with nuking the moon, but I tell people about how we should only allow the Federal government to do things that are in the Constitution, and people say that’s crazy all the time. And, I’m sorry, but I’m fairly sure that I’m right and everyone else is wrong. Plus they are unthinking sheeple.

  7. Something from Nothing argument is a philosophical argument that proves logically: The existence of any thing cannot have come from nothing or no thing nor could it have ever existed at all.

    To partially grasp this understanding the philosopher must first realise that nothing or no thing equals the absence of any thing including the absence of absence itself (nothingness). One theory shows that the universe was created from the expansion of heat energy (Big Bang) but the Something from Nothing argument shows that the energy could not have ever existed at all nor could it have come into existence from nothing. But the alternative is Creationism, which says that a creator God created something from nothing, and must himself have come from nothing, or from something that came from nothing, unless this God was infinite.

    Okay I hope this clears up all the confusion.

  8. First you talk to yourself, but you’re not crazy.
    Then you talk to the squirrels, but you’re not crazy.
    Then the squirrels talk to you, but you’re still not crazy.
    But when you start doing what the squirrels tell you to do, THEN you’re crazy.

    (you can replace ‘squirrels’ with Algore, MSNBC, celebrity activists or liberal professors, and it still works.)

  9. They used to call me “The Silent Majority”. Last year, Janet Napolitano started calling me an Enemy of the State.

    Sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me.

    (And if they try the sticks and stones, I have a Glock in my pocket.)

  10. I think we should stop worrying about burning the Koran and start working on ways to burn more of the people who follow it.

    I think the only difference between CP-USA and the cabal of satanic whores who rule the Democratic party is that the latter have a better press agent.

    I’m genuinely amazed that civil war hasn’t broken out yet. When elected officials routinely violate their oath of office, not because someone is buying them off, but because they subscribe to an ideology that directs them to do so, then at what point does armed insurrection become not just a good idea but a moral imperative?

    Yeah, I drink anti-freeze, what of it?

  11. I once heard it said that there are three signs of a crank (or in this case, extremist):

    * Every crank has a theory about the Jews.

    * Every crank has a theory about the gold standard.

    * Every crank has a theory about who *really* wrote Shakespeare’s plays.

    And nowadays, you can add a fourth:

    * Every crank has a theory about who’s *really* responsible for 9/11.

    So, if you have a theory about the Jews, the gold standard, Shakespeare, or 9/11, you are an extremist. Please shut your piehole: I don’t want to hear it.

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