So Obama added Biden to his ticket in 2008 to give it more gravitas, which was just one of many big mistakes to follow. Obama, being a dummy himself, assumed that since Biden had been in the Senate for decades, he must know something — when actually suggests the opposite of that. Now it would be too big a deal to dump the lunkhead, so they’re forced to just try and manage him until election day. So to help out, here are some ideas to make Biden look smarter.
IDEAS TO MAKE BIDEN APPEAR SMARTER
* Make sure his mouth is always full of a whole bag of Big League Chew so he is unable to talk.
* Have him wear thick glasses, a mortarboard, and an “I’m with stupid” t-shirt where the arrow isn’t pointed at himself.
* Somehow get him a prop newspaper to hold that on the outside is the Wall Street Journal and the inside is nothing but Marmaduke so he’ll be entertained.
* Give him an earpiece that feeds him things to say and a collar that shocks him when he strays off topic.
* Have him always carry around a bunch of books. To encourage this, hollow out the books and fill them with gummy worms.
* Put dark sunglasses on him to hide his vacant stare.
* Promise him if he’s quiet and doesn’t make any embarrassing statements, he’ll finally get that rabbit farm.
* Have him wear a Paul Ryan mask.
Get him to talk about gardening.
Sadly, I honestly believe it’s just the opposite. I think they want Biden to keep saying as many stupid things as possible. They just know they need to pace the stupidity at the right intervals to get maximum media coverage.
Let’s face it, every second that Nobama doesn’t have to talk about the economy or jobs, it’s a “win” for him.
So it’s “Get out there, crazy Uncle Joe”, and share some more of your wisdom. Then you can take a nap…”
Make him always stand next to Janet Napolitano so he appears like a genius by comparison.
Get him out of that little red suit and away from the organ grinder.
re Dirk The Imapiler, I concur. However, my reasoning is: Having a VP that looks stupid was probably part of a plan to make Obama appear smarter. Maybe not much point to finding a solution to a solution.
Appear on “The View.” When compared to those dullards even Joe is a mental giant.
To help him pass the time on a long flight on Air Force One, Joe the Vice President was working on a crossword puzzle. He leaned over to President Obama and said. “Excuse me Mr. President, but what would be a four letter word for a woman ending in u-n-t?” After thinking a moment the president replied, “Why that would be ‘aunt’ I believe.” Joe was silent for a moment and then said, “Oh-oh, in that case do you have an eraser!?”
I think Biden’s apparent senility is exactly what makes him useful to Obama. Biden is Obama’s life insurance policy. He may be an incompetent Marxist hack, but the next one in line is just embarrassing.
As far as I’m concerned, I’d trade an incompetent Marxist hack for an incompetent hack, although without the “Marxist” he may not get the same level of protection from the leftist media and appear as incompetent as his predecessor should have.
Biden IS a Democrat, but I don’t think he’s a Marxist on purpose. I see him as more of the kind of politician that will say whatever needs to be said to get elected and stay that way and he just doesn’t know any better. He’s kind of a throwback to the Democrats of old… before the party was totally cooped by Socialist ideology.
Wow, who knew? So, the real reason we have endured all of this ridiculous “political correctness” was so that by the time Joe Biden was part of the administration everyone would be afraid to use the term “mentally retarded.”
that fourth one would never work. Right after he said, ‘Hello’, he’d descend into a spastic rendition of the Cool Jerk and that’d be it.
They want him to sound stupid. That way, Obama sounds smart by comparison. It would be best for the GOP to just pretend that Joe doesn’t exist, or maybe even try to praise what little intelligence he has.
Might work, but he’d lose out against her in the manliness category.
For starters, it might help Joe if he started doing that thing where audience members call out simple math problems, and then he could answer by counting out the answer by stomping his foot.
How to make Joe Biden appear smarter?
Two words: duct tape.
Stick an ice cream cone to his forehead and pump the room full of nitrous oxide.
Plastic surgery – he could go for the Waxman look, or maybe get a Kucinich.
Biden is smart, in his own way, after his own fashion.
I think he’s got some dirt about Obama, or maybe the people that suggested him as VP, or maybe both.
There’s no way somebody just said out of the blue, “Hey! Biden would be GREAT for our VP!” Unless they were as dumb as Biden himself.
Ok. Now that I look at it, the second one seems more likely after all.
8 Ideas to Make Biden Appear Smarter. Have him stand next to Mr. Obama whenever the president talks about economic policy or health care.