……..an automated foot out of mouth machine for “Crazy Uncle Joe”. He’s getting old enough that removing them is getting labor intensive and dangerous for him and us.
……..a TSA station complete with pat down artists for member of Congress who come to visit, hence why no one wants to visit the Oval Orifice.
…….a teleprompter – that way the president won’t ever be off message or honest.
………a throne so he can “reign” in the style his rule as befitting the ” Almighty Emperor for Life”.
In the Oval Office, the just installed…The original Jimmy Buffett Margaritaville Margarita Mixer featured on the South Park episide entitled “Margaritaville.” And the best news of all, is that the U.S. Treasury Department only had to pay 90 trillion dollars to get it!
A “Left Turn Only” sign so Obama remembers how to get to his desk…(Secret Service uses the same sign when they take Biden out to NASCAR events…Recycling is good !!)
According the the New York Times the White House just installed a new sh!t shining machine for all the sh!t Obama is dishing out can be shined and polished real nice.
. . . telephones with direct lines to MSNBC, the New York Times, and the Washington Post, so that they all know what to say.
. . . portraits of Louis Farrakhan, Josef Stalin, Jeremiah Wright, and Karl Marx.
In the Oval Office, they just installed a doggie-door so Joe Biden doesn’t need to scratch and whine to be let out anymore.
-ls
… a hopium bong with a presidential seal
a lie detector in the lecterns.
In other news, Obama, Biden and the remainder of the staff will be at Camp David until further notice.
A web cam from inside the Akula class submarine so Obama can get a water’s eye view of the damage Russia is going to cause.
…TOTUS, so the President can finally talk on the telephone to somebody besides Michelle or Joe.
…some murals of Kenya, to remind the president of home.
…some new signage to differentiate doors from windows.
…a new Emergency Bucket Removal Station.
…Laser tag! But, Joe Biden just keeps standing in the corner, shooting himself, then shouting “I win!”
a replica of the jamkaran well.
……..an automated foot out of mouth machine for “Crazy Uncle Joe”. He’s getting old enough that removing them is getting labor intensive and dangerous for him and us.
……..a TSA station complete with pat down artists for member of Congress who come to visit, hence why no one wants to visit the Oval Orifice.
…….a teleprompter – that way the president won’t ever be off message or honest.
………a throne so he can “reign” in the style his rule as befitting the ” Almighty Emperor for Life”.
Bullshit detectors on all the doors, and now everyone’s locked out
. . . a corner for Joe Biden to stand in.
. . . an ATM
. . . a Left Turn Only traffic sign
. . . Mitt Romney’s favorite new carpeting, getting it ready.
…a life size mirror, so the current occupant can gaze longingly at the one he loves the most.
…Biden mouth harness and body chains ala Bob Morley.
… a microphone plugged directly to Soledad O’Brien’s mouth.
…a two-car garage door, as Michelle can’t fit her “toned arms” through the current door.
…a bust of Ward Churchill.
In the Oval Office, they just installed… A teleprompter.
In the Oval Office, they just installed… a sticker on the phone labeled “this end up.”
http://www.imao.us/index.php/2012/06/imao-flashback-obamas-3am-phone-call/
In the Oval Office, they just installed…A halal approved fried twinkie machine for Ramadan. Don’t tell Michelle.
…outlet safety caps and took all the paperclips away from Joe.
….new locks to keep out Romney.
…a blast door for when Bill Ayers comes over to visit.
…a revolving door to make it easier for his staff to find jobs as lobbyists.
… a baby gate to keep the dogs in and Crazy Uncle Joe out.
…a sense of Honor. Obama looked at it and asked, “Whuzzat?”
…a changing station for Joe.
…new air filters in the echo chamber.
In the Oval Office, the just installed…The original Jimmy Buffett Margaritaville Margarita Mixer featured on the South Park episide entitled “Margaritaville.” And the best news of all, is that the U.S. Treasury Department only had to pay 90 trillion dollars to get it!
… The Cone of Silence. That way Obama can honestly say “I never hear Joe say that.”
Ear sized expansions on the doorways so Obama doesn’t have to walk through sideways.
…a waffle machine and a Put-Put Golf™ course.
An industrial grade ballasted coat rack for uncle joe to hang his assortment of “safety helmets” on…. and it has a built in crayon holster
…an air filtration system in an attempt to remove the stench of failure.
An invisible fence to keep Joe from wandering off the official grounds.
… a TV monitor dedicated to 24/7 coverage of Joe Biden attached to a big red button labeled ‘gentle reminder’.
…The Clapper. But, the press corps keep making the lights go on and off.
…the Closet of Silence.
…a prayer rug.
…a corner. Sorry, there is now one less Joe Biden joke in the world.
@Lawrence Simon – I think that’s a one-way doggie door for snacks.
Okay, twist my arm. I’ll tell the joke.
How does Obama confuse Joe Biden?
Call him into the Oval Office and tell him, “White people can’t make slavery comments. Go stand in the corner.”
a washable finger-painting wall for Joe.
a map of all 57 contiguous US states.
a shrine to his Chinese masters.
a one-way pet door. Bo can come in, but he can’t get out.
a memorial to the unknown job he created or saved.
A panic room and four more years supply of arugula.
…a turnstile that only allows entry after a $100 campaign contribution.
A “Left Turn Only” sign so Obama remembers how to get to his desk…(Secret Service uses the same sign when they take Biden out to NASCAR events…Recycling is good !!)
a countdown clock labeled “Communism in: “
Those kinetic motion balls..to mezmorize Biden while important decisions are made, like how can we blame Bush for THIS !??
A bumper sticker: “The last dog I ate was smarter than your honor roll student”
An ejection seat, I hope !!
According the the New York Times the White House just installed a new sh!t shining machine for all the sh!t Obama is dishing out can be shined and polished real nice.
. . . telephones with direct lines to MSNBC, the New York Times, and the Washington Post, so that they all know what to say.
. . . portraits of Louis Farrakhan, Josef Stalin, Jeremiah Wright, and Karl Marx.
@Iowa Jim: …so they all know what to say and what national security secrets to publish.
a mosque
…. a corner for Joe Joe to stand in when he’s naughty.
…a hotline directly to George Soros.
In the Oval Office, they just installed… A giant floating head to advise Barack. Pay no attention to the Valerie behind the curtain.
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