. . . trashed a park, defecated in public, and realized that it’s really more of a drum “triangle” than a drum “circle” when there are only three people present.
. . . began writing their memoirs, in which the Occupy movement was the most meaningful political, economic and social movement in the history of forever, and they were the brilliant stars of the movement (pun intended).
…looked back on all that they had accomplished – the pointless dramatics, the wasted city resources, the murders, the rapes, the spread of disease – and vowed to do even more in the future.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…called each other on their I-phones and tried once more to come up with a concise list of demands.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…all stayed in bed, because “The Rich Guys” were keeping them down, so what’s the use of trying ?
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…wait, what am I saying? They don’t even know what day of the week it is, let alone that it’s the 1 year anniversary !
…published a business plan that included an FY 2013 strategic focus to occupy Broad Street and Exchange Place before raising capital through an IPO to leverage the brand and pursue franchise opportunities on New Street and Nassau Street.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…tried to go in on a cake, but all they could muster up was a quarter, three pieces of chalk, a bunch of misspelled signs, and a nickle bag of weed that’s mostly stems and seeds.
Dude…We are the 99%, right? We’re also the 47%.
So…does that make us like…the 140-something percent? Or like…did we eat all those brownies?
That’s soooo funny, dude…I think we need to…wait, what was I talking about?
…protesters once again left their parents’ basement for the day. It took forever to get enough players in Call of Duty.
…searched for relevance.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…
pooped it’s pants, and cried for it’s mama.
…screamed, cried, pooped themselves, and could only think of themselves. So, pretty much how everyone celebrates their first birthday.
…tried once again to kill their lice and fleas.
…made sure their iPhones were well-charged so they could order out for pizza this time.
…took a day off from work. So, it was pretty much like every other day.
. . . trashed a park, defecated in public, and realized that it’s really more of a drum “triangle” than a drum “circle” when there are only three people present.
…wore their best pair of blue jeans that were already standing up on their own.
. . . began writing their memoirs, in which the Occupy movement was the most meaningful political, economic and social movement in the history of forever, and they were the brilliant stars of the movement (pun intended).
…checked the essentials:
Choom √
Lighter √
Money for Latte’s √
iPhone charged, plus earbuds √
DNC talking points on notepad √
Hairband, beads and clothing stickers √
Emergency toilet paper √
Rape prevention kit √
protested the artificial significance of one day over any other based on the white, masculine, Euro-centric time-keeping methods.
..could only manage two “down twinkles” over the embassy riots/Romney’s reaction.
…looked back on all that they had accomplished – the pointless dramatics, the wasted city resources, the murders, the rapes, the spread of disease – and vowed to do even more in the future.
set up three more rape tents.
…met up with Muslim protesters and you couldn’t tell the difference between the two groups.
took a bath.
set up a hippy punching booth.
donated their pets for the big lunch meeting with Barak.
Sarah Jessica Parker showed up to provide horsey rides for the kiddies.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…called each other on their I-phones and tried once more to come up with a concise list of demands.
kidnapped hedge fund managers and forced them to compete in drunken caged knife fights.
demanded food, water, toilets, tents, favorable news coverage, birth control and internet access; all delivered to their mom’s basement.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…all stayed in bed, because “The Rich Guys” were keeping them down, so what’s the use of trying ?
declared the event gun free. Violent assaults tripled.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…wait, what am I saying? They don’t even know what day of the week it is, let alone that it’s the 1 year anniversary !
asked Susan Sarandon to the be keynote speaker, and they all wept anew at the rembrance of the Sarandon-Robbins split.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…Hippies everywhere pitched a tent.
…showered.
…got jobs to pay for the cake and party favors.
slept in, showed up in the late afternoon and wondered where the free stuff was.
…had one of their mom’s drive them to the park.
…published a business plan that included an FY 2013 strategic focus to occupy Broad Street and Exchange Place before raising capital through an IPO to leverage the brand and pursue franchise opportunities on New Street and Nassau Street.
…left the cake out in the rain. It took so long to bake it. They’ll never have that recipe again.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…got congratulatory collection notices from the banks holding their student loan notes.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…had a drum circle and chanted, “We’re the 47 percent! We’re the 47 percent!”
…wanted a pony and they must have gotten it. What? They didn’t? But the smell. What? Oh. Ooohhhhh!
…created a world record Human Centipede.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…tried to go in on a cake, but all they could muster up was a quarter, three pieces of chalk, a bunch of misspelled signs, and a nickle bag of weed that’s mostly stems and seeds.
…. had Nancy Pelosi jump out of a cake.
To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street…
So were they celebrating their inception, their failure, or their demise?
…All of the members were declared protected habitat for fleas and lice by the EPA.
…Occupied a small window ledge and declared it their Liberated Urban Space. The pidgeons were annoyed.
…mourned the loss of OWS members that constantly get run over by trucks loaded with money that Obama keeps sending to Wall Street.
…unionized, then voted to go on strike.
…lobbied to have lice, fleas and canker sores declared as dependents.
…did the same thing they do every night, Pinky—try to take over the world! One basement at a time.
. . . raped a dog.
. . . “Wait, it’s been a year? I just got here yesterday.”, said the protestor in a tent filled with fumes.
. . . burned “Batman Rises” bootleg dvds.
For the anniversary they were let out of quarantine.
Dude…We are the 99%, right? We’re also the 47%.
So…does that make us like…the 140-something percent? Or like…did we eat all those brownies?
That’s soooo funny, dude…I think we need to…wait, what was I talking about?
…decided on its agenda.
…occupied Chuck E. Cheese.
@g
Thank you so much for that image. I need to cleanse my inner eye.
served a very special funnel cake. That’s…not…funnel… cake …!
…said, “meh”…
is occupying a shoe-shine shop in sheboygan
… slept until noon, ate some Cheetos & then posted about how awesome Obama is to their 3 remaining Facebook friends.
Showered!
Were hosed down by the EPA 3 times and put back into quarantine.
…they decided to occupy the Cake Boss.
…received birthday wishes from the economy…”There is no cake, there is no ice cream… Happy Birthday M… F-ers..”
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