Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Obamacare open enrollment started this week. New enrollees…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Obamacare open enrollment started this week. New enrollees…
…are asked to bend over and kiss their bums goodbye
…will find that healthcare is more affordable when it’s funded with OPiuM (Other Peoples’ Money)
…will not pass go, will not collect two hundred dollars.
…are encouraged to blame Bush.
… are coming in from Alpha Centuri to sign up !!!
… must fail a simple IQ test.
… who only speak English will have to come back later. (Fortunately that doesn’t affect too many people.)
… get an Anonymiss cookie (not – psych!!!)
…crash the web site.
… won’t believe what happens next! Click here to find out.
…will be given walnut therapy.
…will be told they can keep their doctor if they like their doctor…. but won’t be able to find a doctor.
… have to be told that they’re ordering Frank’s book from Amazon, because they’re too stupid to realize that buying health insurance is for their own good.
… should check back in thirty days to see if their data has been wiped clean from the HHS hard drives.
…are stupid.
… should ignore the fine print that says they are casting an absentee ballot for Mary Landrieu.
…who fail to make required payments will have a lien put on their transplantable organs.
… can enroll with this one simple trick!
… have nothing better to do with their time while they are waiting outside Home Depot for someone to offer them a day job.
… think they are signing up for that new TV series Romper Room Redux.
. . . will get a free toaster if they are among the first five-hundred to enroll; nobody who enrolls, however, will be able to find a physician willing to treat them
. . . will also be offered several million dollars from an anonymous Nigerian if they simply provide him with information about their bank accounts
…will be disillusioned in due course…
…will become test subjects in the government’s minimal care study…
…won’t be enrolled, won’t know it for months, won’t understand what’s happening to them…
…are in line for cost increases, long wait times, and fewer healthcare options…
@16 Iowa Jim: “. . . will get a free toaster if they are among the first five-hundred to enroll; nobody who enrolls, however, will be able to find a physician willing to treat them.” — or Jonathan Gruber with the toasters.
…will be investigated for not signing-up last year, fined and have their computers hacked. Oh, snap!
…are not allowed to play with sharp objects.
… will have to metaphorically step over the virtual Flanders Field of old enrollees.
#19 Jimmy…check my response to your umlaut comment on the LOTD thanks
Obamacare open enrollment started this week. New enrollees…
will be obliged to eat the previous enrollees.
will find themselves naked in Tijuana without their left kidney and no pleasant Tequila hangover to compensate.
are just as stupid as the old enrollees.
…will be offered the all NEW super-saver Tin Plan, Which comes with an appointment at the Jack Kevorkian Klinik
…will only be cost effective if they are in the late stages of Ebola infection or early stages of death.
…will have to meet the pre-existing condition of setting themselves on fire and then stop, drop enroll.
…will have to quit taking their meds beforehand because you have to be crazy to enroll.
. . . are ecstatic and signing up by the tens
…must do the Truffle Shuffle to gauge their BMI.
…must read the plan in order to know what’s in the plan. They may re-enroll in 2028 after completion of this task.
…cut down the largest tree in the forest…with…A HERRING!!!
…must report to Ferguson for protest duty.
Obamacare open enrollment started this week. New enrollees…
are still arriving from South America so please be patient.
will have their identities stolen in a quick and orderly fashion.
include Daffy Duck and Fred Flintstone.
Obamacare open enrollment started this week. New enrollees…
… must already be declared dead, the only way to save that mythical $2,500.
… probably think Doogie Howser is a real doctor, and Obama is a real president.
… are warned not to eat from Mooch’s nutrition recommendations.
… no longer wonder why Democrats ran away from this stinking pile in the last election.
… get an autographed picture of Karl Marx.
…are composed primarily of people who thought they enrolled in last year’s open enrollment.
…will be hazed by spending 30 minutes in a dark closet with a naked Lena Dunham.
… will be enrolled automatically, unless they opt out. (It nearly happened to me!)
… Will be treated with dignity and respect… Now, strip naked and get on the probulator.
… must submit first born children for sacrifice, along with big toe of choice.
… must swear fealty to “The One”, and submit to an immediate IRS audit.
… must disavow any knowledge of the tastiness of Anonymiss cookies, and immediately consume a FLOTUS lunch to prove loyalty.
I judged this line here: http://www.nukingpolitics.com/2014/11/nuke-punchline-better-study-hard.html
Go get your cookies at 12:30 EST!
@37 – Anonymiss – Thank you…
Link post scheduled for 12:35