38 Comments

  1. Write a book about the time his Swift boat got shot up in Cambodia when he was covering John Kerry’s heroics.

    Seek confirmation of his claim of being lynched for attempting to give up his front row bus seat to a woman named Rosa Parks, the woman most famous for being the only one to say no to Brian Williams.

  2. Discover a cure for cancer, find Amelia Earhart’s plane, rescue the castaways on Gilligan’s Island, help Mr. Spock reprogram the entire USS Enterprise computer system, rid Hawaii of the menace of spy Wo Fat, have guided tours of the location where his rocket from Krypton landed, get a Connecticut social security number, fix all freeway potholes, and sue Stars and Stripes.

  3. …take dancing lessons so this does not happen again.

    …join OJ on the links and help him find Nichole’s killer.

    …apply to become Jeb Bush’s head speech writer.

    …challenge Pinocchio to a lie-off

  4. ….why,… he’ll invent a world of his own making, of course !
    ‘Williamsburg’ has a nice ring to it. He’ll be at the entrance gate and will request your particular backround story,
    to eventually make it his very own ‘special tale’.

    …then,… you’ll go out for beers with Brian, while he bores you to death with Fantasmagorical B S, the likes of which you’ve never even imagined…..

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