Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
…a heads-up display with direct access to WikiLeaks…
[For the muslim market, a head-up-on-pikes display when a female driver is detected. For male drivers, a built-in brisalyzer.]
…it automatically writes posts to your Facebook and Twitter accounts about how much Chrysler sucks.
…body styling that doesn’t resemble an over-proofed Italian loaf…
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
Your own personal Liberal to b**** at you for using gas and killing the environment.
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
it takes selfies for you.
powered by 4 illegal immigrant families on bicycles.
Frickin’ laser beams.
“it takes selfies for you.”
According to the linked article it actually does that.
People actually read the articles?
Yes – unless they have the new Chrysler which reads the articles for them.
I only look at the pictures.
Then don’t bother – it’s not a link to a pron site 😉
CrankShaft Daily, or Popular Mechanics
…it has four on the floor and a fifth under the seat.
…that sucks up white lines faster than a DeLorean.
Advanced cruise control (it’s a midget that you store in the trunk when not in use)
a Samsung Galaxy Note 7 combustion engine (assembled with Samsung washers).
Walrus Winchell wipers.
Automatic theft detection system that informs thieves (in a Darth Vader voice) “This is not your father’s Chrysler.”
Mexican wheels that reject whitewalls.
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
CDs of Lee Iacocca’s greatest speeches
Dual trunk monkeys
A gadget to auto-recycle the leaking oil back into the reservoir
…for recent muslim immigrant men, in emergencies it’s steering wheel deploys an inflatable doll.
…when it sees a Trump bumper sticker it shifts into road rage gear.
…no tinted windows but the Chrysler Le Drug Baron has a hoodie.
An extraordinarily good rear-view mirror so that you can see all the parts that fall off as you drive down the road.
An electronic bumper sticker that changes its political message depending on how many Whole Foods, payday lenders, or gun stores there are in a neighborhood.
Disables internet access to Kelly Blue Book and Consumer Reports.
Complete immunity (and rewards) if your 2017 model destroys a Legacy, wipes out a 4Runner, embarrasses Challengers, passes Civics, eliminates Fiestas, puts Cherokees to the test, or outcompetes Outlanders. Or just wrecks a damn Prius.
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
An owner’s manual whose first page brags about how no Chrysler has ever been used on “Bait Car”
A rewards program based on roadside assistance visits
…the latest in Italian all-season tires. Dago in the mud, Dago in the snow and when Dago flat, Dago Wop, Wop, Wop.
If that’s a reference to some classic song or bit, I haven’t heard it; but if it’s original I’m jealous.
It’s an old gag – haven’t heard it in 30 years.
Thanks for the reminder, Burt!
… on The Common Cordoba 17. (It’s a 4×4).
A Trunk Monkey
Chrysler’s latest car comes with an unbelievable new feature…
…a passenger hologram of Ricardo Montalbán talking about the cars “rich, thickly-cushioned luxury seats in soft Corinthian leather”.